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{{rainbowsmall|HOLY SHIT SHE'S PREGNANT AGAIN!}}


<center>[[Image:Oprahpregnantman.jpg|Whatever respect was left for Oprah has just gone crashing through the floorboards.]]</center>

{{squote|
Doctors have discriminated against us, turning us away due to their religious beliefs. Health care professionals have refused to call me by a male pronoun or recognise Nancy as my wife. Receptionists have laughed at us. Friends and family have been unsupportive; most of Nancy’s family doesn’t even know I’m transgender.|That last line contains the most [[lulz]].}}

Thomas Beatie is a semi post-op female to male transgender attention whore. She/he recently became famous by announcing to world that "he" is the world's first pregnant man.  Naturally, an announcement such as this can only be made on daytime television. He is a huge [[Fag|Fag]] that only changed sexes to get [[attention|famous]].  

[[Image:howdoigotpregnant.jpg|thumb|right|[[Asking_for_it|You were asking for it.]]]]
==The world's first pregnant man, or rather, the world's 6 billionth pregnant woman==

{{squote|
"Despite the fact that my belly is growing with a new life inside me, I am stable and confident being the man that I am."|Thomas Beatie, not a man.}}
[[Image:Thomasbeatie.jpg|thumb|left|[[Fail|Facial hair doesn't make you a man, a penis does.]]]]
[[Image:RealMpreg.jpg|thumb|200px|I can see the scars where your boobs used to be.]]

This was originally thought to be an April Fool's Day joke by [[Fox News]]. If only.

Even though it's not a joke, it also isn't the scientific breakthrough it may seem to be. Thomas Beatie was actually born Tracy Lagondino, a full-fledged woman with a vagina, uterus, eggs and kitchen-know-how.  Not some XXY mutant freak with an overdeveloped clit like Chyna, but a actual dainty dame. 

At some point in her twisted life she ''chose'' to feel like a man trapped in a woman's body because she's a total attention whore, and decided to have gender reassignment surgery.  Unfortunately, the surgeon did a half-assed job and left her vag intact.  One of the deciding factors in determining if someone is a man or a woman, is usually whether they are a [[penis|plug]] or a [[vagina|socket]], but for some reason Thomas/Tracy/It decided to become a malformed [[Manbearpig|half man, half woman, half pig]] with no tits and no penis.

But because of her surgery, she is "legally" considered a man, thus, Thomas might get into the history books on a technicality for being the first pregnant man (See also Barry Bonds).

Since even a fucking 5 year old knows men have a penis, and women have a hatchet wound, Thomas' only real claim to fame is trolling Oprah and the American public.


<center>One of the lines from a fan is "I'm hoping it's going to become a trend."


<youtube>MNkZhcmorOw</youtube></center>

==Unholy Union==
Thomas and her bull-dyke wife Nancy devised their plan to spit in God's face more than a couple years ago.  Nancy, the real woman, had previously had her uterus yanked out by a rabid monkey at a petting zoo, so she was unable to get preggo by Thomas' nonexistent sperm.  

Unlike most couples married in a house of God, being down one uterus did not leave the Beaties out of the baby race. Since [[Raptor Jesus|Jesus]] no longer liked Nancy, Thomas decided to go off his/her Testosterone regimen, and get knocked up the old fashioned way; with some [[anonymous]] [[Cum|sperm]] and a Turkey baster. God once again told them to "knock it the fuck off" by giving Thomas an ectopic pregnancy, which required the doctors to remove one of his fallopian tubes (egg chutes). 

===UPDATE===
[[Image:Juliannaatbirth.jpg|left|thumb|The reseult of a sucessful pregnancy.]]
{{squote|
His first successful insemination ended in a life-threatening ectopic pregnancy with triplets, resulting in the loss of all his embryos and his right Fallopian tube. “When my brother found out about my loss, he said, ‘It’s a good thing that happened. Who knows what kind of monster it would have been?,” he wrote.|Not everyone has a grasp of [[irony]].It would have probably been some sort of [[Cloverfield|monster.]]anyway.}}


On 4th July 2008 Thomas Beatie, a low-life degenerate cum-dumpster, gave birth to a girl - thus creating a completely [[cock]]-free family. What a sad, pitiful thought.
There are three possible outcomes to this unholiest of births:


# The spawn will become like the one who bore it, becoming a man-hating [[lesbian|bulldyke]] until it re-assigns it's gender to become a cock-hungry faggot - having been deprived of a juicy penis for so long.
# It will go through it's whole life thinking it's a boy. Thus becoming the arch-enemy of [[Chris Crocker]].
# It will become [[an hero]]. If someone doesn't get there first.



==Oprah appearance==
Beatie's appearance caused a stir among many who questioned the lengths some of Oprah's female viewers were going to to get on her show. Oprah herself responded to this in an interview with some newsreporter.

Reporter: "Given what Thomas did, what do you think the average female viewer will now have to do to get on your show?" 

Oprah: "Well I don't know, Thomas really raised the bar. I'd think someone would have to cut off their arm at the elbow and sew it to half of a dismembered snake creating some sort of hybrid limb that hisses and spits venom. Or maybe cut off their ears and sew them to their elbows, it's gonna be tough."

==SHE'S PREGNANT AGAIN!==
Just when you thought things couldn't get any more fucked up she got pregnant again. I think she's trying to recreate [[spermcube]].

==See also==
[[Image:Mrgarrison.jpg|thumb|right|"Look at me everyone, I'm a man!"]]

*[[Pregnant]]
*[[Pregnophile]]
*[[Juliana Wetmore]] Thomas gets a healthy baby girl - this normal couple get a mutant. [[God]] does have a sense of humour.
*[[How is babby formed?]]
*[[YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG]]
*[[Snapesnogger]] Considering Beatie is an [[azn]], she's probably drooling all over him/her . . .
*[[Mpreg]] Nice try "Thomas".

==External links==
*[http://www.popfi.com/2008/03/21/the-story-of-the-pregnant-man/ Some story about him or something.]
*[http://www.iht.com/articles/2008/04/14/opinion/edjacoby.php People agree; she's a chick, and an attention whore.]
*[http://allieiswired.com/archives/2008/07/thomas-beattie-gives-birth/ This particular blog is sympathetic to Thomas. It also has articles laughing at female celebrities for getting knocked-up.]]
*[http://www.whynotcoconut.com/?p=717 They're going to make a movie about it. Yes, really.]
*[http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/northamerica/usa/2111788/Pregnant-man-Thomas-Beatie-to-publish-book.html And a book.]

[[Category:People]]
[[Category:Trolls]]
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