Sparto
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Sparto, also known as El Brooko Diablo, is a internet womenz who moderates 420chan along side Kirtaner. She is also French or some shit. Recently they've developed a romantic relationship. Sparto also seems to cause 90% of the irc drama, taking out her frustrations by kicking and banning guests and ops alike. Often these bans have parameters of years or decades, but most of the time they're removed within 24 hours, if not seconds. as of late the banhammer comes down with a resending blow, splitting the channel, atom, and hopes of those it befalls. With a crack the user is blown from the channel like water from oil, thrown unto the raw pits of Internet and timeouts. This has given her an almost Snacks-like reputation, as when she is bored or doesn't like a thread, she's known to toss the banhammer into the air and wait to find out where it lands. She, along with feem, is perhaps the best reason to avoid 420chan's IRC. She also likes shitty metal such as Emperor and Bathory.
For lulz, show her CP. She haets child pornography, and she reportedly "vomits on sight". It barely compares to Tinal though, who's such a wimp the mere wiff of CP turns his stomach. This is because she was molested as a child, and still feels guilty that she enjoyed it. Mention this to her as often as possible.
When Kirtaner decided to have a 420chan get together, Sparto inevitably joined up, much the the chagrin of the other goers. However after much begging and crying from Kirt, the other people decided to come along too. While in transit, Sparto was denied entrance into the land of bagged milk and Bryan Adams, the reason for this are unknown but some of our favorite theories are:
- (1) She was smuggling drugs in her anal cavity
- (2) She was smuggling drugs in her anal cavity
and of course everyone's favorite
- (3) She was smuggling drugs in her anal cavity
Also while in the presence of Kirtaner, Sparto faked an emotional breakdown. This inevitably led Kirt to go "ZOMG INTERNETS IS SERIOUS BUISNESS", because he had to deal with a crying, pouting, drama filled little girl in his bedroom. While Sparto claims that the people in the #420chan channel caused this, we all know that the true cause of this was due to her complete lack of self-esteem, which caused her to go all Attention Whore on Kirt and thus ruin any chance of fun at the 420chan get together.
Kirtaner has stated that she is "nicer" in person. The validity of these statements have yet to be proven.
For a while, "Sparto" filtered to "Kirtaner" on 420chan's /b/ board. This was apparently Kirtaner's way of saying "you mess with my woman, you mess with me!" to the hordes of Sparto-haters.
NEW DEVELOPMENTS: Sparto has decided that the distance was too far between her and her internet boyfriend and decided to take up residence at Kirtaner's home. Expect 420chan to blow up in the coming weeks
Ironically, after Sparto moved up to Canada, 420chan really was shut down. The 420chan userbase will be happy to know that the site is back up, but may as well just add that to the long list of things they can blame on Sparto.
| —Sparto |
| —Sparto |
| —Sparto |
| —Sparto - (referring to a user who she kept devoicing for no apparent reason) |
| —Sparto - (what everyone actually reads when Sparto speaks in IRC) |
[20:31:33] * Fail-chan removes channel operator status from Sparto
[20:31:33] * Fail-chan sets ban on *!*SPQR@*.hsd1.pa.comcast.net
[20:31:34] * Fail-chan has kicked Sparto from #insurgency (shut your mouth when men are talking)
Figures in this article are carefully calculated statistics.
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Sparto is part of a series on *chan |
| Visit the Chans Portal for complete coverage. |
