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Much like [[pizza and beer]], '''hookers and blow''' are two entirely separate items that are fundamentally inseparable. 

==The History of Hookers and Blow==
[[Image:doingblow.jpg|thumb|right|No visible Hookers, but two or so rails of blow]]

It is widely believed the first [[hooker]] ever was actually Eve of Eden. She'd [[blow]] anything for a little [[drugs|bump]]. It was also stated, in The Bible, that Adam is a [[furry]]. But that's neither here nor there.

Blow was invented by [[God]] to give Eve an excuse to [[prostitute]] herself to animals and [[Jews]]. It was also responsible for [[womyn|women]]'s rights in a strange way. 

Women began to gain much power when they realized that if they were to hook for the blow, but not snort the blow, they would have both [[money]] and blow, which they could then sell earning them [[moar|more]] [[money]]s. With this money they bought [[God]], [[Dollfie|Dollfies]] and [[Your mom]]. They later gained the right to vote or [[whatever]].

It was thusly realized that to prevent women from buying more [[crap|shit]] that they would need to be controlled. Hookers and blow were battered with a [[scat|mudslinging]] campaign that made them look [[ugly|bad]] and uncool. Now a secret elite watches over the world to prevent [[cunt|women]] from rising once more. [[Never forget]] that women are fucking [[evil|devious]].

==Contemporary Hookers==
[[Image:Businessman.jpg|thumb|right|Sole consumers of the combination of both hookers and blow.]] 
[[Image:UglyHooker.jpg|thumb|Unfortunately, this is more common]]
[[Image:Kadupree3.jpg|thumb|right|This [[Eliot Spitzer|whore]] <s>is</s> was way overpriced.]]

In this modern age, hookers have adopted a slightly stigmatized reputation. They exchange simple services for a price. In other words, for example, hookers [[suck]], usually for [[At least 100|about]] twenty dollars. This is enough to buy [[crack]] for them, and [[vagina|crack]] for their customers too!

A strange species evolved [[at least 100]] days after [[noone|everyone]] was told Hookers + Blow = Bad. These creatures were mammals with tufts of [[hirsute|hair]] on their heads and strange narrow patterns extending from their lower neck to their bellies. These are often made of silk and are made by like, Armani, or [[whatever]]. Pictured at right, these strange [[cow|beasts]] were flush with [[money|disposable income]], often were called [[rapist|charming]], [[DESU|eloquent]], and [[hawt|handsome]], making them the perfect customers for hookers, while their [[money|cash]] usually ensured that they themselves had [[drugs|blow]].[[Image:HAUNTED_HOOKER.jpg|thumb|left|It is widely believed that this is what Hookers look like.]]

==Fun Facts About Hookers!==

[[Eliot Spitzer]], the former Governor of [[New York]] has spent more [[money]] on hookers than you will ever see in your entire [[basement dweller|basement dwelling]] lifetime. It is also believed that paying for sex is the only way Eliot will [[EVAR]] get laid again.

For about the same price you would expect to pay to take some girl out for dinner and a movie, or out to the opera or some other boring event, you could get yourself a pretty [[hott|good looking]] hooker!

== [[Cocaine|Blow Itself]]==

Blow, coke, snow, white, [[Satan|Devil's Dandruff]], Soft, white bitch, yeyo, Totally Awesome White Alabama Liquid Snake, Food of the Gods, toot are all sort of [[dumb]] names for cocaine. Found in the wild, cocaine is from like leaves and shit in South American jungles, maybe. 

In fifth grade, my [[pedophile|teacher]] told us the [[Mexican|natives]] [[blowjob|sucked]] on the leaves and just like passed out for days. They'd like...foam at the mouth. And just lie around for days and days. That, however was totally pointless becuase just laying around doesn't burn [[ana|calories]].

Fortunately, coke has been refined, redefined, and relined so it is suitable for our [[stoner|highest]] [[ana|supermodels]]. Mostly, it is used by bored, rich businessmen to keep [[whore]]s around.  

The relationship of hookers and businessmen is one steeped in [[semen|history]]. What better to spend some cash on then a drug that makes you feel unexceptionally awesome and a woman you don't have to be nice to?

The best example is the etymology of the word [[blowjob]]:

<center>
'''''Blow:''' slang for the drug Cocaine.''

'''<font size=5><big>[[Mathematics|+]]</big></font>'''

'''''[[Job]]:''' what you do to get paid.'' 

'''<font size=5><big>[[Logic|&darr;]]</big></font>'''

'''''Conclusion:''' a job done for blow.''
</center>

==Other Uses==

Blow and Hookers or Hookers and Blow can be used for many multitudes of things.

For example, what says [[gay|I Love You]] better than a big olde snow pile and a [[loli|fourteen year old]] Cuban hooker? Wives: take notes! If you can't get Cuban, go for a [[Mexican]]. Never settle for a Guatemalan. Studies have shown a high [[statistic|percentile]] of [[tranny|trannies]] of this ethnicity. 

Try out a little blow and a well-weathered old whore to tide over Little League winners! Wait until you see the happiness a woman with a [[otherkin|Tinkerbell]] tattoo and a C-section scar and two rails can give your little slugger!

Has your little [[jew|Schlomo]] become a man? Pick up a Kosher [[muslim|Israeli refugee]]. She'll be so grateful she's been fished from the middle of [[Israel|Fuck-You-I-Was-Here-First-Land]] and so numb and [[horny]] from the blow she'll make a man of the party guests, rabbi, and maybe some furniture.

== See Also ==

* [[Hookers]]
* [[Cocaine|Blow]]

[[Category:Netspeak]]
[[Category:Memes]]