ZOO: The Movie
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
| —Charles Mudede - Who obviously isn't shocked by horse buttsecks. |
Contents |
The Film
| —When will the oppression cease? |
Even PETA couldn't believe this shit.
This documentary (moar liek COCK-umentary amirite?) is about the life of Kenneth Pinyan - better known as "Mr. Hands". The film itself was made with 2 of the men who drove Mr. Hands to the hospital when his ass began spitting blood.
The film is mainly about "dispelling" the arguments against bestiality in a way that would make TheAmazingAtheist proud - mainly that sex with animals is a beautiful loving thing (unlike those fuckards who dare to eat meat - except the cock) and that only Christians have a problem with this. Clearly anyone who can't see the beauty of a loving relationship between humans and non-humans is a closed-minded Nazi-worshiping bigot.
Unlike the internet, the film itself does not contain many explicit scenes, which is why even the animal-lovers were bitterly disappointed that there was nothing to fap to.
It was nominated for best picture at the Sundance Film Festival by a bunch of pretentious yuppie scumbags. In this movie, it is also shown that the horse had his cock cut off in retaliation for puncturing Mr. Hands's colon. And also to prevent more sick fucks from killing themselves by impaling their sphincters on delicious horse cock.
Some poor ignorant bastards have confused this movie with Equus and had a horrible, horrible surprise.
Reviews
Below is proof that not everyone in the U.S.A. are bible-bashing Christfags. Under normal circumstances this would be a good thing:
- The Seattle Time where Mr. Hands himself came from, gave a movie a positive review saying: "A tough sell that gets respect at Sundance."
- Indiewire called it: "one of the most beautiful films of the year."
- Toronto Star wrote: "gorgeously artful ... one of the most beautifully restrained, formally distinctive and mysterious films of the entire festival."
External Links
- User comments at IMDB. The first guy who gave it 10/10 also left his e-mail...
- Somebody is foolish enough to ask why the fuck anyone would sympathize with this sad excuse for a human. So many flames follow her ass ends up more inflamed than Mr. Hands himself.
- The aptly-named "Ew.com" says what we're thinking - even after pretending horse-fuckers are an oppressed minority, you still won't understand WTF is going on.
See Also
- Bestiality
- Cory Williamson Another victim of prejudice
- Darkhorseman Sadly, unlike Mr. Hands, he isn't dead yet
- Free Speech
- Furries Of course they like to pretend they're the horse
- Thor
- Mr Hands The man himself
- Orangina Now they're on TV...
- Vegetarians They don't liek horse-meat either
- Victim complex
- Your resistance only makes my penis harder!
- Zoophile
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ZOO: The Movie is part of a series on Furfaggotry |
| Visit the Furfaggotry Portal for complete coverage. |
ZOO: The Movie is part of a series on Bad things to happen to animals
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Basic Concepts
Furry • Bestiality • Taxidermy • Animal Abuse |
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Opposing Concepts and Causes
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BestiLOLity in Action
Poeticirony • Crusadercat • Darkhorseman • Dracoguard • Esachasa • Mr. Hands • WolfJLupus • Chibiabos • Charles-wolfman • ShadoWolffess • Snover • Skylos • Marry Your Pet • Neuticles.com • Dalhusky • Cory Williamson • Abbie Hawkins | |
Why We Don't Have Nice Things
Alcohol • Alisa Kuzmenko • Michael Vick, a.k.a. Ron Mexico • Camrose Cat Killers • Chevy the Therapy Dog • Cheyenne Cherry • City glitter • LinktheWolf • Staredog • Tinkebell • Wang Jeu • Zeriara • Zippocat • NEDM • David Motari • "Mudkips" the cat • Bonsai Kitten • Japanese Bug Fights • Heaven • Kenny Glenn • Travis the Killer Chimp • Tyler Weinman • Marvin Morvan and Alex Teniola |
