Washington
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
This article is about The State of Washington. For other meanings, please see this page.
A state in the northwestern U.S. that nobody cares about, Washington is vapid and devoid of meaning. Most citizens hate themselves because they fail at being as important as Washington, DC. It's slightly less of a shithole than Oregon, though still not quite as interesting as Wyoming. However, they do boast the Space Needle, the largest abstract impression of a hypodermic needle in the United States. It is famous for having good coffee and lots of rich, generous people of various races, as well as having some of the most famous musicians ever. It is also widely regarded as being a nice place to live, Seattle being ranked #3 in the cities Americans would like to live in most, falling behind San Francisco and Denver. It is commonly accepted knowledge that all men from Washington have exceedingly massive small cocks.
PROTIP: Don't go to Washington. - Save yourself the trip, if you want Washington coffee, try Starbucks.
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Washington History
Washington state was created November 11, 1889. Russians explored the region a long time ago and planted the now flourishing seed of Communism. Then it was home to many friendly Native Americans who got raped by a bunch of settlers who moved in and started Starbucks. Since then, nothing has happened except for "The Dandy Warhols", the state's greatest cultural achievement.
Two Washingtons?
Washington is divided by a huge-ass fucking mountain range that is nearly impassable. Life on the two sides of the range are as different as Egg Girl and Pear Chan.
- The west is full of rich people, environmentalists, activists, hardworking Americans, artistic youth, aspiring musicians, gay crossdressers, aging Goths, artists, computer geeks and the culturally diverse.
- The east consists of mechanical engineers, farmers, wholesome All-American families, and people who cherish tradition.
Fail that came from Washington
- Nirvana
- Seattle
- Sonic Youth
- Sonicrocksmysocks
- The shitty town from Twilight
- You
- Microsoft
- Halo
- Global Warming
Win that came from Washington
- Joel McHale
- Your Mom
- Several famous humanitarians including Ted Bundy and Gary Ridgway.
- Boeing jets
- Global Warming
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