9/11
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
9/11, also known in some circles as .8181, is the abbreviated version of "September 11," on which date certain men in black from the US government twice set off hidden explosives in teh world trade center towers, fired a missile at the Pentagon, and tried to blame it on Muslim terrorists. The result was a bunch of butthurt Americans who suddenly became "patriotic" and subsequently the sale of kitschy flags, patriotic t-shirts, and pins with crying eagles rose Over 9,000%.
9/11 is also the date on which certain fascist terrorists led by Augusto Pinochet and backed by the CIA hijacked the democratically-elected socialist government of Chile, as a result of which some 3,000 innocent South Americans were executed or “disappeared.” Funny old thing, history. If you think this is at all relevant, you are a terrorist.
Reason to 9/11? Why, it is so simple. It was the super friends who took the WTC's down. George Bush was flying Wonder womans invisible jet and crashed into the towers.Space ghost and Casper took out the pentagon as per VP Cheneys orders. Flight 93 was a drone with no passengers or crew and filled with tax stimulus refund checks for the liberals, Superman directed the plane into the ground in Penn. where co-conspirators called 911. This is the absolute truth because i say it is. I have irrefutable proof and you have to believe me!
9/11 is also known to be the date on which a whole bunch of crazy redskins killed all the populace and set the Chilean city of Santiago on fire. And then raped all the women. After killing and burning them. But nobody gives a shit about that anymore.
9/11 is also known to be the date Jews blew up the twin towers to get insurance money.
9/11 is also the day Papa Bush started the gulf war, 11 years BWTC.
9/11 is 111 days before new year.
9/11 is also known to be the date when a bunch of rightards attacked and killed 30 workers in Cochabamba, Bolivia, throwing the bodies to the river.
9/11 was actually performed by group of Japanese Anime fans source. Sadly, President Bush didn't drop over 9000 nukes on Japan, instead he just killed some totally unrelated and innocent people in Afganistan and Iraq. But we must never forget who was responsible - see picture to the left.
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[edit] Holy Fucking Shit
In common Internets parlance and on various old media outlets, 9/11 is used to make liberals feel guilty for hating America, not supporting the war in Iraq, and forgetting about Poland. If you suggest that there was any significant reason for people to commit suicide while killing 3,000 people you are a conspiracy theorist and will be pwned with impenetrable conservative logic, seen here. Conservatives and President Bush, meanwhile, use it to justify their political ideology as well as any policies that may seem, on the face of it, stupid or crazy.
YOU GUYS ARE ALL ASWHOLES! - PEOPLE FUKING DIAED AT 9/111, ED IS A BUNCH OF LOSSERS AND FAGOTS. YOU ALL DISCUST ME... WE ARE AT WAR, STRT BEEING MOORE PAYTRIOTIC. IM SOORY FOR SPELING, I AM DISLEXIC. - SPARTAN BALLS.
IRL, the term 9/11 is often associated with cheesy, über-patriotic imagery of the event, such as on mall-bought t-shirts proclaiming "NEVER FORGET!", and on the bumper stickers of countless SUVs. All of this swag is made in China, further funding Communism.
[edit] Theories
[edit] Loose Change
Known internet fucktard Dylan Avery also presents the story of Loose Change, which is a documentary void of scientific fact. Plz refer to above. Also, Jews did WTC is NOT a theory, it is SCIENTIFIC FACT YOU INSENSITIVE FUCKS.
[edit] Illuminati
Richard C. Hoagland proposes that Freemasons did WTC, [1][2] or the Muslim League of Assassins did WTC due to the Freemason back story with the Knights Templar, or those chain letters you get about how 9+1+1=11.
If we could tie the actual architects of the WTC towers directly to Freemasonry, we would have strong support for this aspect of our theory. To this point however, we have not been able to do so. We do, however, have some fascinating circumstantial evidence.
[edit] Alternate Theories
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[edit] Conclusion
These theories above are all retarded, and made up by wacko nutjobs, because everyone knows that Jews did WTC.
[edit] The Nightmare Continues
After several years of calm, the United States was yet again subjected to a harrowing, nightmarish vision of the apocalypse when dozens of little boxes with lights and pictures of terrifying alien creatures flipping the bird were placed in prominent locations in ten major U.S. cities in early 2007. By late January, the boxes had existed without incident for several weeks, and thus the obvious dangers inherent in little boxes with lights on them would have probably gone unheeded for perhaps one or even two more weeks had not some brave resident of Boston noticed them, pronounced them "wicked scary," and notified his or her local Catholic priest and the Department of Homeland Security, which promptly shut down a portion of the city and brought in bomb squads to have them removed. Understandably, the governor of Massachusetts and spokespersons for several law enforcement departments were outraged, calling the incident a "hoax" unfit for "this post-9/11 world." Their reasoning, of course, was sound. It is a well-known fact among terrorism experts that 90 percent of all a-linear attacks on Western targets perpetrated by Islamic terrorists involve little boxes with lights on them depicting cult characters from hipster-friendly American late night television cartoons engaged in a purely Western hand gesture, and which are placed in prominent locations for several weeks without exploding.
[edit] You're a terrorist
A common defense used by anyone who disagrees with you is saying "9/11" and "Terrorist." Once these words are spoken you instantly lose and are supporting terrorism and there is nothing you can say that makes you sound less like a terrorist; your best option is just to fuck off or call them a Nazi.
Example:
"Why are we going to war?" "Saying things like that support the terrorists." "O"
Once you have let everyone know you're a terrorist, all that's left is to blow some shit up. Follow these simple steps to ensure epic win:
[edit] Clarification
Not to be confused with the very similar sounding 7-11. While both of these number related names have a lot in common, namely the Arabs and Indians involved in the plot to take over USAn ghettos, the effects of 7-11 are much more pervasive than 9/11
[edit] Videos
Tribute
Many people have tributed 9/11 with websites, epitaphs and other such useless things which definitely amount to the equivalent value of a human being. However, the best of these is the Ecuadorian singer, Delfin Hasta El Fin, which translates to, seriously, 'Dolphin Till The End'. I'm not even going TRY making fun of THAT. Although it shows you many things about his sexual identity. His music video, 'Twin Towers', is a wonderful insight into how the South Americans (wait, what?) view the tragic events that occurred on 9/11. We cry, but for many different reasons.
Delfin Hasta El Fin's "Twin Towers" Video
Also, there are the highly overlooked deaths of countless woodland critters which perished during the crash of United Airlines Fight 93 into a Shanksville, Pennsylvania field.
Video Links
- Osama! The Musical
- Actual Footage of Events
- Further irrefutable evidence can be seen here.
- Benny Hill did WTC!
[edit] Gallery
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[edit] See Also
[edit] External Links
- 911 was funny.
- Fappin material.
- Marion Cotillard says it is better that the towers were destroyed, so that we don't have to spend money to modernize them.
| 9/11 is part of a series on Terrorists 
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Big Players Osama Bin Laden
• John Walker Lindh
• Muslims
• George W Bush
• Unabomber
• Cho Seung-Hui
• Michael Moore
• The Finnisher
• Matthew Murray
• Robert Hawkins
• Timothy McVeigh Terrorist Groups, Beliefs and Causes Arab
• Axis of Evil
• Iran
• Ireland
• Islam
• Pakistan
• Palestine
• Sudan Terrorist Actions Waco • WTC • Columbine • ATHF Terrorist Attack • VTech • Oklahoma City Bombing • Delaware State University Shooting • Police Brutality You can help improve Encyclopedia Dramatica by adding more and more awesome explosions and killers of civilians. |
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