User:Kevman459

From Encyclopedia Dramatica

Oh Hai.

I like to stalk the recent changes page and edit other peoples failed attempts at funny, because I'm not funny myself. --Kevman 459 22:49, 28 May 2008 (CDT)

Subpages: User:Kevman459/Opentasks

Shit I can never find when I need it:

• Molestion Log
• Plumbing Log
• List of Templates

To do list

• Clean up Goddessmine
• Rewrite/add pics to Tits or leave
• Operation Caption - add captions to galleries severely lacking them.
• Add "moar like (sexual pun on article title), amirite?" to the first sentence of every article on ED.
• ????
• Profit!

[edit] Open Tasks - My Version

[edit] Comedy Gold From Special:Unusedimages

I liek this image and don't want to forget about it.

This needs to be used somewhere.

I don't use the word epic very often, so I won't start now.

[edit] Vandalism is Fucking Pointless

From new user to raep in 7 minutes.

[edit] WHAT NOT TO DO

These are real snippets from ED. Please don't be like them.

[edit] Charizard14

Charizard14 is a Fat Lonely Nerd since 1990 and is a Clone of Fatferaligatr and done over 9000 fat pictures like fatferaligatr.His name is Jay york (moar like Gay York,Amirite?)and he is a 18 years old Sickfuck and he draw like a 5 years old child. He is a World of Warcrap player and Talked Always About his fucking Graduation. DRAGON ROID RAGE!!! DRAGON ROID RAGE!!! His favorite Pokemon is Charizard ( at least 100 years old he love that same dragon).His favorite band is Linkin Park and it mean he is a Emo.He claims he like to eat everthing ( same your mom )

[edit] You have two options

[edit] When you get two options

You will get two options after a teacher (usually of Italian decent) becomes aggravated because you're talking in class or did poor on a test. At that point he will say, "You have to options: I can cum on your face or I can cum on your tits" Then you get to decide weather you want his man syrup on your chest or face region.

[edit] The options

-face

-tits

[edit] Kierkegaard

A Danish philosopher whose only merit is that he died before the age of 45, note: "possibly from complications from a fall he had taken from a tree when he was a boy".

He was a Jew, a cancerous tumor in the Aryan racial body.

Excerpt from "The Concept of Irony"

There is some truth in this, and therefore it may also be said of this Seyn that it is das unvordenkliche Seyn [the being absolutely antecedent to thought]. As such it is the beginning of all thought; it is the first object of thinking (primum quod se objicit cogitationi [that which reveals itself for cognition], which is not the content of thought but can become that. It may be objected that it can never be imagined, either, but to this reply might be given that there are many possibilites of imagining such a possibility prior to the actuality, such as a machine, a work of art.

[edit] Rocky

Rocky is a 6 part movie serise about a man with a drug addiction who has to fight to stay alive. In the first movie he starts off as a bum on the street doing circus acts to survive. Then the world champion of boxing a crazy gay man gives rocky a chance to fight him if he gets gay with him.

[edit] Snus

Snus is a drug invented at least 100 years ago by Scandinavians who remembered the days when they were tough and manly vikings and not communist homosexual furfags. This was done because no Swedish man had ever had sex with a woman since the vikings were pwned by Christianity when all women got laid by niggers and the white man felt he had to ensure his survival. The irony of this, of course, is that no woman would ever go near a man who has stuffed his mouth with fail. To counteract this embarrassing mistake, alcohol was invented.

[edit] Faceless boy

Wow where do I start with this article... First off, I guess he figured he would leave his computer on 24/7 so ED could call up the image on his hard drive whenever someone accessed the article. Second, is it supposed to be a meme from /b/? The filename looks like a 4chan rename, but he changed the copypasta to /ED/tards from /b/tards....

Image:C:\Documents and Settings\Jamie\My Documents\My Pictures\1204446982362.jpg

Hey /ED/tards!

I don’t know what’s wrong with you guys, seriously! You all bawwww about not having girlfriends, lives or any other shit. But here’s the truth:

-I have a girlfriend; she’s really hot. And I mean REALLY. -I play keyboard. None of your shitty emo music, no. I play stuff people enjoy SOCIALLY. -I have TONNES of friends, male and female. I’m funny, smart, and friendly. -I get good grades. I’m going to get rich, while you faggots sit in your basements.

The best bit? I spend about 4 hours a day on here, and have done for about a year. I’m one of you, but not. I’m everything you want to be, but aren’t.

Pic is me. I got rid of my face, because I don’t want you freaks fapping to me.

[edit] Roffles - aka: Why there needs to be a 30 day waiting list for new members to create new articles

Roffles commonly used in ROFFLECOPTER or ROFFLES WITH SYRUP causes da lulz of all people. For example, when you say roffles to a furry or a Jew, they will fall to the ground and burn to death. This is obviously because they are not anything cool like a toaster. Toasters are cool. LULZ. It is a well known fact that they Americans(fatty fatty 3 shoes) like roffles with syrup, or anything else with syrup. Americanz is fatties who liek syrup on everything. Especially their Mudkipz. Roffles is the number 1 killer of all AZNS in da hizzouse. Roffles and Lulz make da azns not be able to drive. Poor azns.