The Royal Family

From Encyclopedia Dramatica

The British Royal Family can trace its roots back to Danish King Cunt [1] and to Adolf Hitler, and is one of the oldest institutions in the world. Famous for inventions such as the 60,000Hz fart[2] and the art of sniffing coke off footmen [3], the present incumbent, Queen Elizabeth II, is old enough to remember when gays and abortion were illegal, when the average Brit pronounced the word “house” as “hice” and freely used words like “nignog” and “chinky”. Now only her husband freely uses those words.

1 Members of the Royal Family
2 Not members of the Royal Family
3 The death of Lady Diana
4 See Also
5 Breaking news (28/02/08) - Americans plot to kill Prince Harry
6 Who says Murdoch and the Sun hate the Royals?
7 Gallery
8 External Links

[edit] Members of the Royal Family

HRH The Queen’s new populist image

[edit] Queen Elizabeth II

The present Queen has reigned over Britain since there was something worth ruling over. Now she is left with the dregs. She was temporarily deposed by Margaret Thatcher in 1989 when she was made furher after the Falkland putsche. The Queen was reinstated in 1990 when the country realised Thatcher was a regular fucking scare-the-bairns and that the Queen, conversely reminds us all of Nan.

PHILIP MAH BOIIIIII!!!

[edit] Prince Philip

Prince Philip was emasculated by his bitch wife when she rode him up the aisle, fucked him up the arse and forevar robbed him of the chance of being King of the Greasey wops - WTF Phillip! Show the bitch where the kitchen is, amirite? In response to the shame of having the wife wear the trousers and steal his penis, Phillip resorted to the life of the troll, mostly at her expense. That'll learn the cunt Phil!

Phillip has had some notable win in his career as a troll:

"Where did you get that hat?" - To his wife, the Queen, immediately after her coronation (1953)

"Everybody was saying we must have more leisure. Now they are complaining they are unemployed." - Said during the 1981 recession (1981)

"If you stay here much longer, you'll all get slitty-eyed." - Said to British students in China (1986)

"It looks like it was put in by Indians." - Said after he saw a poorly constructed fusebox (1999)

Edinburgh: "And what exotic part of the world do you come from?"

Lord Taylor: "I'm from Birmingham." - An exchange with Lord Taylor of Warwick, who is black (1999)

"Do you still throw spears at each other?" - To an Aboriginal man on Australia's Tjapukai Aboriginal Cultural Park (2002)

"If you see a man opening a car door for a woman, it means one of two things: it's either a new woman or a new car!"

"You look like you're ready for bed!" - Said to the President of Nigeria, who was dressed in traditional robes

"Never pass up a chance to go to the loo or to take a poo." - When asked his secret for dealing with public appearances - GENIUS!

Harry in the family's traditional dress uniform

[edit] Lesser Members

Princess Britney of Monaco

Generic term for younger royals who get their tits out, have sex and hang out with Eurotrash minor royalty. Like Lady Sara Philips and Hermione Granger.

Lady Diana of Princess of Wales

Generic term for victims of the Royal Family such as the Princes in the Tower, Diana Spencer, the prostitutes of Jack the Ripper, the wives of King Henry the Eighth and Shergar.

Princes Harry and William

The acceptable face of Nazism and a major fap dream for young American girls who long for big throbbing Royal cock. One is the son of Prince Toby Jug, heir apparent to to the Crown of England, the other the son of James Hewitt, professional horse fellator. Can you tell? Known for killing Argentinians and wearing the Swastika whilst serving in the Armed Forces.

[edit] Not members of the Royal Family

Prince
King Naseem
Duke Ellington
Queen Latifah
The Pope

Osama bin Laden

People of the wrong sort who could never be accepted as members of the Royal Family

[edit] The death of Lady Diana

Lady Di (geddit?) was an attention whore, a wigger and a peace activist who had a taste for Arab dick. After causing a massive fall in the share price of the Duke of Edinburgh's landmine investments and getting herself knocked up by a fucking Muslim, she naturally had to die[4] and was sentenced to death by Fiat Punto. She has since become a Dead Gay Icon and along with Dorothy, Marilyn Monroe and Freddie Mercury is much loved by Elton John. Her death led to the kidnapping of Shergar to provide a replacement shag for Prince Charles.

[edit] See Also

Queen Elizabeth

[edit] Breaking news (28/02/08) - Americans plot to kill Prince Harry

An American website has told Al Qaeda where Prince Harry is fighting in Afghanistan [5] so that he'll be easier to blow up with a roadside bomb.

Other helpful information for potential assassins -

Code name: Widow 67
Call Sign: Budgie

Harry in Afghanistan last Thursday

[edit] Who says Murdoch and the Sun hate the Royals?

Yeah, like so this is such a good joke right, cos Harry’s girlfriend is called Chelsy and they went to a party in Chelsea, and so the Sun said “Harry’s back in Chelsea” like we’re meant to think that he’s back in Chelsy, like he’s got his cock in her vagoo or something. Brilliant!!!!

[edit] Gallery

Lady Diana after being embalmed for her funeral	The Queen invented the upskirt	Lady Diana invented anorexia	Princess Anne invented secret anal in public
Younger Royals are more media savvy than the older generation	Fap	Too black to fuck a Royal	Prince William molests some commoners
Prince Harry has the hots for the Nazis	Charles stars in a “Carry On” film for charity	An artist’s impression of the future King Charles and Queen Shergar	Necrophiliac wet dream
Necrophiliac dogging	Necrophiliacs mob Buckingham Palace hoping to get lucky		Classic Portrait of the Queen.