The Dark Knight IMDb Board
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Geeks rejoice! "The Dark Knight" (the latest movie about Batman) is the Best. Thing. Evar. The act of waiting for it only makes life worthwhile, if excruciating. Nothing compares to it --not even sex.
To discuss such metaphysical event infinitely, without carnal desires of any kind, you should go to The Dark Knight IMDb Board.
Contents |
Welcome to hell
Much like the boards on 300 and Star Wars, TDK IMDb Board is a shithole in the form of a concealed forum. If you're not a geek (and you have my congratulations) stay away from it.
This pit full of comic-book experts has a new topic every 9000 YEARS. The virgins type frantically with their chubby, sausage-like fingers, twiddling away on the keyboard. They have complete disregard for orthography or life itself. It should be noted that the movie's tagline, Why so serious? (Alt. spelling while fapping: Why so seriouos?) has become a signature line, a nickname, a password, even a meme, but worst of all, a secret salute for geektards everywhere.
Of course you can't criticize TDK, nor the trailer, nor the director or even the guy who plays Alfred. You can expect more drama and more shit when this thing gets released.
Some topics of discussion
- OMFG!!1! THE DARK KNIGHT'S #1 OUT OF 250!!OMG!!
- Who should Paris f^ck next?
- Megan Fox's vagina (by thedirtiestplayerinthega - nice one)
- Joker not Chemically burned?
- What music would Batman and Joker listen to?
- A cameo by Cesar Romero (despite the inconvenient fact that Mr. Romero is dead)
- Do you think The Joker is capable of raping someone?
- Batman - Christian or Atheist?
- Batman is gay (literally) - (but we knew that, amirite?)
- Will there ever be peace between Nolanites and Burtonites?
- BATMAN VS SUPER MAN VS SPIDER MAN TRIPLE THREAT
- George Bush doesn't care about black people!
- Gay
- Ron Paul...REALLY? [1] (The discussion that followed, you guessed it, is worthless)
- Do you think Batman could ever REALLY exist?
- Oh noes, Heath Ledger is dead!!! WTF DO WE DO NOW??? (PROTIP: fapping won't bring him back, and it's a dead cert that a gajillion fucking threads on a messageboard won't either)
- SUICIDAL PEOPLE COME HERE!!!!!!!!1111111
- Teh Jocker doesn't care about black people!
- I Tried to Kick a Guy in My Dream and Kicked My Wall In Real Life
- Imagine if Bruce Wayne was black.
- Bruce Wayne: Nigger or Jew...or both?
- Barney the Purple Dinosaur BETTER then Ledger!!!
- The general audiences should be thanking people like me
- would batman eat only one packet of oatmeal?
- Is there anyone in here who liked The Aviator more than The Departed?
- Which Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants girl would you have hot sex with?
- POLL: Have you ever eaten your own poo?
- incest? what do you guys think about incest?
- ?????
- PROFIT!!!
- RUNNINGJOKES!!!!11
The sad thing is that these are actual posts. Lulz were not intentional.
A message to the TDK board
In all truth you are stupid to claim wars on other boards when you have two posts a second and most of your threads are off topic and nasty. Maybe you Dark Knight bitches are so intent on causing trouble because your offline lives are so fucked up, so unjust that "THE BAT" himself has recurited you to cause chaos because 'it always gets darkest before the dawn." Really people get a fucking life and wait for the goddamn dvd release!!! Go kill yourself, this movie is pretty fucking shit.
Put away those black tights, take care of your kids and your wife. Or better yet get a decent job that prohibits you from being on the computer so much. Scrub your ass and wash that yellowly green dye out. Buy a business suit that doesn't make you look like a cheap pimp (excluding all forms or purple). Stop saying that everyone reminds you of your father and " you hated your father). If you hated pops so much then A) you were a spoiled brat, B) daddy didn't cough up enough cash to pay for your extra screenings of this film, or C) you were born in the hoodz. Answered yes to any of those choices and no one cares to help you. IT'S A DOG EAT BAT WORLD BITCHES!! The entire public knows that The Dark Knight is box office gold so chill out batties. You are suppost to promote justice not paranoid rebellion.
Enter Pimptaddyone, ruining the movie for everybody
Just after an IMDb user named Pimptaddyone watched TDK, instead of hanging out with some IRL friends, he went straight to his keyboard and ruined the experience for everybody. Some details below:
- The Joker, a Oprah's new protege, reveals himself asking Batman to take his bra off or he'll start killing people. He says he does it for the mob: he wants their money back, and in exchange wants half of Batman's bra for himself. The Joker kills some people using big ass stones and small bras as slingshots, but decides to go higher and kidnaps both Rachel Dawes and Harvey Dent: Batman has to decide which one to save -- Rachel, who sleeps using Batman's left breast as a pillow, or Harvey, who sleeps using Batman's right breast as a pillow.
- As part of his plan, Joker gets captured by the Justice League of Bras; batman rushes to Rachel to save her, but the Joker has lied, he's not an A-cup but a Double D! Batman ends up saving Harvey Dent, who loses his mind completely when he discovers that not only Joker escaped with his favorite bra, but has set on fire the bra and the police building.
- Joker announces that the Mayor has to die, or he'll blow up Gotham's giant blow-up doll that is lying conveniently on the rooftop of Gotham Hospital. Dent decides to hunt down anyone who was involved in Rachel's bra burning, and kills people too using a gun loaded with bullets made from compressed bras: he finds Macaroni and kills him, just after Macaroni (worried about Joker's increasing bra size) has said to Batman where to find the Joker. Meanwhile, the clown blows up the blow-up doll that looks like a hospital with Batman on top
- Now Joker actually runs Gotham City Bra Inc., so he tells people that they have to deal with only A-cups and nothing else. If they can't hadle it, then they can leave. Two giant bras of pepole leave the metropolis: one full of criminals, and one full of innocents. Joker stops the bras and announces that he'll blow both the bras up at midnight, unless one bra blows the other up (they both have inflators).
- Dent finds Commissioner Gordon, who got corrupted (but is still "a good bra size") and inevitably led to Rachel's bra-nap. Dent threatens him with his bra-gun, but Batman arrives and dives him into a bra in the floor, apparently killing him. Then Batman decides to go on the run: he wants to pretend he took the bras of the people Dent bra-napped, because he thinks Gotham needs it's ex-D.D.'s bra untarnished and unsoiled.
- Meanwhile, Joker has failed, and he goes in plastic surgery looking for a bigger cup size. The End???
- The question marks at the end of the above statement are a hint towards THE RIDDLER! OMOLOLOLZOLZOLZOLZOLZ!!!
IMDbtards didn't like this a bit, and angry responses (Deleted) followed.
See also
External Links
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