Angry Nintendo Nerd
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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The Angry Video Game Nerd (aka James ROFL or PermaVirgin) is a basement dwelling ADD-ridden nerdraged winnar who creates Gametrailers.com videos where he "reviews" bad video games and, now, films. Instead of actually reviewing the games like a professional slapstick author (video game reviewing is serious business), he just yells infantile cusswords (about at a 12-year-old's level) at his television screen. You, the viewer find this hilarious. Most of them roughly consist of off key utterances from some shit-eating whacked out autistic chug, e.g. "What the fuck!" "What the fuckin' fuck!!" "What a piece of fuck!". At the end of a review he repeatedly talks about topics surrounding shit such as how he longs for the game to be over so he could milk a bull's asshole (or his own) inside out, take a shit on a game, or simply talk about shit itself 'cuz nothing is funnier than a (We can't "remmember" that faggot, no lulz is seen in his bullshitnerdy movies). He also takes a swig of a beer bottle every three seconds in his videos to prove to people he's a man, when really he's only trying to wash out the taste of cum in his mouth.
Angry Nintendo Nerd has officially changed his named to "Angry Video Game Nerd" so he wouldn't get sued by Nintendo for making shitty shirts with his catchphrases on them and associating "Nintendo" with some schizoid, liberal bullfuck phenomenon. It should be noted that regardless of this legal genius, he still has an IQ dwarfed by that of the average 4chan user's left testicle.
Contents |
Reviews
Although it is true that most of the games he reviews are complete and utter horse-shit, his reasons for hating them mainly boil down to him sucking capital ass at video games. It appears the Angry Nintendo Nerd (read: Fugly Famicom Faggot). By now, he's reviewed every NES game that you've never heard of, and his shit-related-phrase count is well over 9000.
| —Official AVGN website, His fans don't get it, furries only! |
| —Angry Nintendo Nerd |
| —Angry Nintendo Nerd |
| —We get it, you'd rather fuck shit-covered animals while another animal with stomach problems empties its bowels into your ear than play games. |
It seems to be funny to 99% of the world when someone adds 'fuck' at the end of a word and pretends to suck at video games similar to how the Tourette's Guy pretends to suck at life which is kind of ironic since both him and the ANN talk about having sex with animals.
For example, "Cockadooky Bullfuck". Now that was some major lulz, amirite? How about "shitload of fuck"? Not just a load of fuck, but a shitload of it! How does he come up with this stuff?Accurate Examples of his Reviews
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AVGN - Resistance: Fall of Man AVGN - Gears of War AVGN - The Orange Box AVGN - Zelda: Twilight Princess |
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Previous Video | Next Video |
Downtime
Somewhen beginning of April 2007, because the furfag retards TheGameBoys account got all their followers to mark all his videos as inappropriate, YouTube started removing the ANN's videos obviously because he sucks a snails ass at being lulzworthy and rather ends up lookin' like an extremely annoying ADD-ridden 12 year old who can't figure out how to work a fucking joystick.
Gametrailers
Because Viacum loves hearing the word "fuck" after everything that has a pulse, their puppet-state known as Gametrailers decided to exclusively host his reviews. If they wind up on YouTube, it's terrible, because then ScrewAttack is losing money that they could spend on pirating full-length movies on DailyMotion with their own shitty commentary. It's only stealing if you get caught, right?
It should be noted that the ANN quit his minimum-wage paying job at Wendy's to devote the rest of his days to ANN. He was quoted by employees as saying, "I'd rather have a buffalo shove a saber laced with shit up my ass while I'm watching a Buffalo Sabre game than work this drive thru!" At which point he was told to STFU and get back to sucking the manager's dick for his severance pay.
Now ANN is a corporate tool who tries to be lulzy, but ends up being made of epic fail in the process.
War
When it was announced that the old arthritic bitch (Sylvester Stallone) was making a pile of shit epilogue to the Rambo series, which will likely be rated G, the AVGN joked that the title would possibly be John Rambo. Well, the joke was up his ass and the title was in fact John Rambo. Fan faggotry burst like a hymen under a needle and people started lulzing under the irony (even thought at the end of the video, he says that he's just fucking around, making the lulz vanish instantly).
AVGN got tired of people who loved him showing appreciation and in his Texas Chainsaw Massacre video, he raeped the community by having his furry Guitar Hero mimic the people. This naturally felt like being penetrated through the ear by Batman, so a portion of the community left his bitch shackling nature and have taken up the cause of ED. When fans pointed this out on YouTube, Mike Matei blocked them and deleted their comments out of butthurt. And thanks to ED pointing this out, the very same review now requires approval for comments.
Mike Matei
As James Rolfe's masochistic right-hand man house nigger, Matei is responsible for cleaning up comments on the JamesNintendoNerd YouTube account, drawing pretty pictures of the Nerd for his videos, yelling at the Irate Gamer every other week, and getting the living shit kicked out of him every time the AVGN does another video. So far he's had the shit kicked out of him as Jason Voorhees, Freddy Krueger, Bugs Bunny (Simultaneously satisfying the AVGN's massive furry fetish), Michael Myers, and The Joker.
AVGN Ripoffs
Just when things couldn't get any worse on teh tubes, The Angry Nintendo Nerd decided to raep the internets on one fine July afternoon exactly three months after An hero day (For the lulz?). The result of this raep was the first ever bastard child of the internets, rightly dubbed as "ANN ripoff #1". When this bastard child was able to grow a penis several weeks later, he then preceded to rape the internets in a fashion that would make a samurai become an hero.
As the internets got AIDS by all of the raping of it by YouTube, the ANN ripoffs then decided to have incest and fuck each other to express their sexual lust for the bad games that they "review". Hence, the ANN ripoff population has grown to a level that's over 9,000.
This devious process has gone unchecked by YouTube, as the admins are too busy stroking it to all those underage girls making out on webcams...that or they're all from West Virginia.
The AVGN Ripoffs have pissed off the internets. All hell has broken loose as the merchant from Resident Evil 4's power level goes over 9,000 and takes his anger out on an 80s CD player:
The Irate Gamer
tries to butt rape the ann concept with his NES he got 2 days ago and by being overweight (FUCKING FATTY)
- Moar info: Irate Gamer.
Alexander4488
Alexander4488: The long lost son of Cockmongler
A "nerd-spired" game reviewer who is less known for his appallingly bad game reviews and more known for his self-fellating advertisements on every gaming website known to man. Like another overly-egotistical game reviewer, he goes to film school and fancies himself as the second-coming of the AVGN on YouTube.
His blatant egotism came to head as a group named FilmsForFustilarians riffed on one of his videos. Being absolutely batshit insane, he came to his own defense in a barrage of video comments where they actually outnumber the number of views the video has. Safe to say, his sheer butthurt generated great lulz for those who witnessed it.
On cue, Alexander has made multiple accounts on ED after this stub was written in an effort to defend his actions.
Furious Famicom Faggot
BRB, not being funny.
Something Awful has been lulzless for quite a while (despite the claims of the Goons that the site is lulzier than ever...fucking liars, they are!). Despite this, they had their hands on a gold mine of lulz and drama that was yearning to be untapped.
The Furious Famicom Faggot, created by Shmorky, was to be a parody that would pwn the Angry Nintendo Nerd and all of those retreads that he inspired. Unfortunately, SA fucked it up and FFF became nothing moar than epic fail and a lulz flop that could have been so much moar. This is in part because the FFF was created as a parody on both the Angry Video Game Nerd and a lesser known fail called Gamelife. As an unnamed lulzosopher put it, "FFF is like the carrot cake of video game reviewers; it is decent when first eaten, but quickly becomes sickening and made of all things fail."
Fortunately, the internets saved itself from certain raeping by giving FFF the AIDS and fail before it became too lulzless for its own good. We can only drink to the lost potential of lulz and win...
A few weeks after the fail that was the Furious Famicom Faggot, Ebeeto emerged from the shadows as another parody of the YouTube video game reviewing movement, however, he is moar of a parody of that lulzless fuck UrinatingTree, instead of the AVGN.
LeisureSuitGaming / Silent Rob
Silent RobAKA The Ginger Whinger, Silent Rob is a hardcore internets tough guy who is more known nowadays for his whiny emo diatribes than his "fuck"-fests in disguise as video game reviews. He got his start as an extremely overrated game "reviewer" best known for his Action 52 review, which was, shockingly, worse than the game was in all aspects. But after sucking Damien Estreich's cock enough to merit YouTube Partnership and the featuring of his videos on the main page, Mr. Estrech refused to give it to him, deeming his work unoriginal.
This is when Silent Rob busted down the floodgates and spent ten minutes bitching about the Irate Gamer, in which his arguments, for every small truth they may have had, were cockblocked by at least fifteen references to IG "loving the cock" per truth. His fanbase, being as intelligent as lemmings, followed his orders and started hating the reviewer, spawning a great, yet pathetic, amount of proxy lulz that still lingers to this day.
Rob has still not gotten over the butthurt of not becoming a YouTube Partner. Seeing the likes of the AVGN, That Guy With The Glasses, and Yahtzee making money hands over fists, he has since gotten into internet panhandling by creating his own website devoted to his poorly-made, unfunny abortions that he calls videos.
But this story has a twist: He charges people $5 just to visit it. He has rightfully suffered backlash from his loyal followers, finally seeing how shitty his work really is. The ensuing lulz that has resulted from Silent Rob's butthurt and subsequent bawwwing about the website can be best described as the funniest thing that man has ever done.
PissedOffVideoGamer
This horrid blob monster is trying to be the Angry Nintendo Nerd, the difference is this fat fuck is way funnier in a completely different way. Just look at him, seriously, the video explains it all.
mpn1990
who couldn't fall for a face like that?The angriest AVGN ripoff who reviews shitty unlicensed games. Action 52 almost killed this poor fellow, but somehow he managed to escape its merciless death grip.
The Mischief Makers Incident
In one AVGN video he is seen giving his angry look at a Mischief Makers cartridge. This caused rage on /v/ as they thought he had or was going to make a review video for Mischief Makers. It turned out that it was just filler footage for an intro and /v/ trolled themselves into thinking otherwise as the AVGN has not stated that he intends to review the game.
Suspension
Last week YouTube suspended the AVGN account. No reason was given, but lots of lulz and BAWWing were seen among the AVGN fanboys. This later turned out to be the result of Game Trailers' own incompetence. Apparently, Game Trailers was too stupid to figure out that the one posting the Angry Video Game Nerd videos was, in fact the AVGN himself and made copyright complaints.
AVGN Nazis
Prisonbreak72020 tries to take on ED.The warzone that is the YouTube Video Game Reviewers and their rivals has spawned many 12 year old jihadists who would otherwise be vandalizing ED,4chan or other mean people who make fun of their idols.
- Prisonbreak72020: Vandal and anticipated an hero. Feel free to leave him a message on his latest ED account user:TheWTFHero, or his new YouTube account MAXPAYNEPRODUCTIONS. Ironically is also a Irate Gamer Nazi. Probably not an epic double agent. Thinks hes black, even though the picture of his mug is shown at the top of his own article.
- greatexpectations320: Once a minor fanboy who evolved into the unholy avatar of the lulzkiller and meme smasher.
- Chickenhed61: An AVGN house nigger and pedophilic furfag who enjoys masturbating to videos of kittens and 13-year old boys.
Of course dedicating yourself to defend 12 year old YouTube users with unfunny game reviews from these people makes you one with the AIDS.
A challenger appears
As of recently, a movie reviewer by the name of the Nostalgic Critic challenged the tyranny of the Angry Video Game Nerd on the internet. The war was started by the Nerd's Nazis in an attempt to take out the competition by saying that the Nostalgic Critic was an AVGN-ripoff. This is far from the truth, for the Nostalgic Critic is funny. NC decided to fight-back, only to piss off the AVGN. The AVGN then gave the NC a threat disguised as a compliment. Thus a war began. As soon as the war began, the AVGN stole one of the NC's reviews. So far, the NC is winning thanks to a fist-fight and reviewing a bad game. Few know how long the Nostalgic Critic can hold out against the AVGN Nazis.
UPDATE: To try and calm the rabid fanboys both have recently appeared in a Collaboration Video together.
See Also
- Video game reviewers
- X-Play
- Irate gamer
- Armake21
- AkewsticRockR
- Sega Kid
- PissedOffVideoGamer
- /v/
- Spax3
- Angry Internet Guy
- Internet DVD - Yup! Now you can spend $30 on the same videos you saw for free!
- That Guy With The Glasses - Website James will fuck off to when he realizes that ScrewAttack are utter douchebags when his contract ends.
External Links
- His YouTube page
- A video of him reviewing Simon's Shitty Quest
- His website
- The Furious Famicom Faggot
- Ebeeto
- An example of retardation at its best
Angry Nintendo Nerd is part of a series on YouTube Visit the YouTube Portal for complete coverage.
