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Thailand

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Thailand sits in the southeast corner of the circle jerk known as Asia. Known primarily for it's cuisine (a staple of the hipster diet) and loose morals, Thailand is a must for any traveler looking for a cheap, 13-year old whore of questionable gender. With a capital named Bang Cock what the fuck do you expect?

The Thai King (asshole) - aka world's biggest pimp.  Note the copious amount of bling
The Thai King (asshole) - aka world's biggest pimp. Note the copious amount of bling
I has a hat!
I has a hat!
Don't you be dissing me for my hat. It could give you up to 15 years.
Don't you be dissing me for my hat. It could give you up to 15 years.

Contents

Economy

Sex Change = Profit
Sex Change = Profit

After many years of slow economic growth, Thailand's economy has recently exploded due to increased production of whores, which is now the country's top export. Due to limited infrastructure, the hookers are generally shipped elsewhere to be packaged into hookers and blow, which is sought after world-wide for its awesomeness. Without exception, these hookers are 13-year-old boys who are not actually "so horny" and will certainly not "love you long time". A mix of orifice tightness and small, easily disposed of bodies make these whores prized by any collector.

Due to over hunting, Thai whores are nearing extinction. However, science has offered a ray of hope in the form of sex change operations.

"Toilets"

Thailand's greatest feat of engineering
Thailand's greatest feat of engineering

Due to its abundance of talented inventors at least 100 years ago, Thailand's excrement disposal system has evolved significantly, going from a hole in the ground, to a delicate and complex hole in the floor. This has the added advantage of a flushing mechanism, which is decidedly useful in holding the contents before losing them, greatly facilitating the prominent national Shit fetish.

Note: You will never find a clean Thai toilet...Ever...

Teh Internets

From Thailand, but claims to be azn.
From Thailand, but claims to be azn.
Thai tourism
Thai tourism

Due to its lack of airports and natural resources, Thailand's annual gross domestic product is measured not in currency, but in volume of pictures and videos of Thai hookers post ED on the internets. 80% of all Asian porn is from Thailand, especially if the porn is labeled as Japanese.

Thai 16 year old girls make money by spreading for nude pictures for Internet porn. Some argue that these girls are sex slaves, but they aren't niggers so it doesn't count.

Fun Facts!!!

Women in Thailand have vaginas with extra functions. Their hole can dispense the following:

  • Ping-pong balls.
  • Cherry-flavored Pez.
  • Hot foam lather.
  • A whet stone to sharpen your ancient Chinese silverware collection.
  • A myriad of other wonderful concoctions including lumpy gravy and AIDS.
  • Thai language can best be described as a muddy pool of sound.
  • The reason the United States lost Vietnam is because all the American soldiers kept fucking Thai Hookers and dropping acid instead of fighting.
  • Live Eels.
  • If you ever visit Thailand make sure you make fun of their king. Thailnise love to hear new jokes.

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