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From Encyclopedia Dramatica

'Scene' is code for 'Gay'

'Scene' is code for 'Gay'

'Scene' is code for 'Gay'

'Scene' is code for 'Gay'

'Scene' is code for 'Gay'

'Scene' is code for 'Gay'

'Scene' is code for 'Gay'

Being a part of your city's scene means you go to the shows of local bands, but dont actually go inside the venue. You would instead, stand outside of the venue being scene with fellow retards. It is a general consensus among the young that naming several obscure bands when asked what one's favorite bands are is way cool and shows you know a lot about music.

Scenesters are elusive and often hard to identify correctly. They can be misinterpreted as emos, usually because the fashion, hair styles, and homosexuality of the two subcultures are virtually the same. Calling a scenester an emo will result in anger. You'll most likely do this, as no normal person can tell them apart by looks. The typical scenester in one city can look very different from the typical scenester in another city. Without getting into the whole music part, the main difference between emos and scenesters is scenesters are less depressed and whiny and a lot more retarded and obnoxious. Unlike emos, who are stuck up because they are faking depression, scene kids are stuck up for the sake of... being stuck up. One of the greatest enigmas of scene culture is that they hate being labeled "Scene", even though they're trying to be scene, which is in fact a MIND FUCK

Emo kids want to kill themselves; Scene makes other people want to kill themselves.

Contents 1 Scenesters on the Internets ...tl;dr 2 Steven Strazzullo's How to Be Scene 3 Scenesters who need some internub flame/fame. 4 The Final Solution 5 See Also 6 External Links

[edit] Scenesters on the Internets ...tl;dr

Scenesters are extremely widespread on Myspace and Livejournal. If a Livejournal rating community is not run by 14 year old ana Paris Hilton worshippers, it's guaranteed that it is run by scenesters.

Scenesteritis is a dilapidating disease closely related to faggotitis. It is fairly contagious and those with low senses of identity are especially at risk. Avoid spending a prolonged amount of time with anyone with scenesteritis, even if you have a low risk of catching the disease. The actions and general aura of scenesters have been known to drive some into a mad, seething, homicidal rage.

The most general symptom seen in those suffering from scenesteritis is an obsession with irony and an uncontrollable need to apply it liberally in any and all situations.

Other symptoms of scenesteritis include:

1. Penchant for the colors black, white, hot pink, pastel green, olive, light pink, and anything neon.
2. Penchant for striped, stars, and polka dot patterns.
3. Penchant for handguns, images of handguns, sounds of handguns ("BANG"), "guns go bang", etc.
4. Always, always, always owns a Myspace. Having a Livejournal is optional, but if he/she does, the username typically contains a long string of pointless underscores (not because the name he/she wanted was taken, but because it looks cool). He/she also changes journal names extremely often for no reason.
5. Uses the ♥ symbol and letter X a whole fucking lot, sometimes as a signature in comments.
6. Propagates the unfunny old meme phrase "kthx" ad nauseam, usually to the point where they end every sentence with it. Other variants are "kthxbai/bye", "kthxdie", "stfu plz kthx", etc.
7. Has emo-esque hair that is very jagged and sleek looking. One long spike sweeps over half his/her face. It is almost always duo- or multi-colored in a bad way. However, also known to have their plain hair with no additions, makes them seem more uncaring about themselves.
8. Seemingly unexplainable obsession with robots and dinosaurs, particularly drawings of them. If a team of paleontologists discovered an entire Euoplocephalus skeleton in rural western Idaho, or if it was learned that CRASAR polymorphic Super Bujold robots are exploring collapsed buildings in New Orleans, a scenester will most likely not give a shit. Also, likes the phrases "RAWR" and "BEEP BEEP".
9. An affinity for pirates, ninjas, unicorns, and the occasional zombie is shared as well. Scenesters are under the impression that randomly saying, "I'm a ninja" in public places or a Myspace bulletin will ensure much lulz. What scenesters don't realize, is that by saying that very phrase do they prove the age old theory that all scene kids are a waste of sperm and egg.
10. Two words: internet disease.
11. Very Mizundast00d.
12. Greets people with insults, typically "skank(s)", "ho(s)", and "slut(s)".
13. Says "NIGGAZ", "NIGS", etc. a lot, under the delusion that it is funny.
14. Creates, promotes and applies to dozens of rating communities. These, and layout and icon-related communities are the only Livejournal communities they will be a member of.
15. Penchant for "retro"-style artwork and design.
16. Both females and males will wear a shitload of eyeliner.
17. Calling yourself scene like a dumbass, without realizing it's an insult.
18. Purchase too much Hello Kitty shit and have Myspace names that have to due with harming another person such as Mikee Br00tal, Michael Massacre, or anything else to due with Virginia Tech
19. Fitted-Hats, Gym shorts, Nikes or track shoes, and a band t-shirt--the proper scene uniform
20. Septum Piercing, Snake-Bites, gauges that were shaped too fast because they wanted to fit-in quick, so now they have thin spots, or a busted earlobe that looks like udders of a cow.
21. A Scenester MUST have an obsession over old retro stuff they probably never cared about prior to being infected with scenesteritis. For instance, every scene kid MUST love Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
22. Overusing the word "cunt", because it's so taboo and offensive.
23. Putting text in brackets for some reason.
24. Usually Having piercings in areas such as: eyelid, thumb skin, knee caps, and/or back of neck.
25. Calling everyone else a "poser"
26. Randomly start headbanging whenever they hear one of their emo shit on the radio, wherever it is, at school, the mall, causing everyone to look at them like "wtf?"

Those who do not fall into a mad seething homocidal rage end up dying their hair multiple colors and experimenting with their sexuality. This means that the first seeds of Scenesteritis have sprouted, and that within a month's time, they'll be taking pictures of themselves and trying to start a band. Upon first seeing the symptons above, you should immediately go to the doctor. If it's too late for that, there is but one option to save yourself: becoming an hero.

Clothing is...oh you know what, fuck it. Scenesters are all hipster faggots and if you ever come across one, beat it within an inch of its life for being a part of the most retarded piece of shit gimmick fad in recent memory.

Scenesters are known to fail at every facet of life that doesn't include being scene. This is the leading cause of the transformation of conventional retard 13 year old boys into full blown scenefags. A popular excuse that an adolescent male scenester will give for becoming a scenefag, is "doing it for the pussy" (obvious lie is obvious). Although all 16 year old whores have secret lesbian desires, and will often find faggotry to be erotic, most womens who aren't scenesters themselves quickly discover that all scenesters are really just flaming faggots.

The funny thing about scenesters is that they're all elitists, meaning that they believe they are above everyone else in every aspect of life. Though they dress like idiots, listen to noise rather than music, and are generally rude and annoying, they find themselves to be the most awesome and unique beings to grace the planet. However, when it comes down to it, they all look, talk, dress, and act the same way...just like every other stereotype. They are basically the scum of the universe and they don't realize it. If a scenester is reading these words now, it will run off and blog about it on MySpace, saying that it just makes them cool that everyone hates them. Deep down, though...he/she is mortally wounded and will probably write a pointless "screamo" song about it.

---

• • Note** It has been a proven fact that scene kids are the survivors [those who did not commit suicide] of the emo era. They constantly 'go to shows' and 'throwdown'. Scene kids are known to be seen in their natural environment; Girls: drinking and partying with guys twice their age; Guys: Fucking girls guys who are at least 5 yrs their senior junior.

[edit] Steven Strazzullo's How to Be Scene

• Step 01: No baggy clothes. Go to thrift stores, Zumiez, Pacsun, Wetseal, and Hot Topic and get skinny pants and tutus. Boys need to wear mid-drift shirts. Clothes need to be "skin fucking tight." Cowboy boots are a must.
• Step 02: Girls need to cut their hair short and then add extensions so it looks "fake as fuck", it needs to be "a choppy mess... much like a cat or a raccoon on top of your head." Lots of bleach, then dye it black, so your hair looks "fried." Guys just need long hair. Or put as much haircare products as possible before you go to bed, then what ever faggot hairstyle you so happen to wake-up with is your new look.
• Step 03: Wear as much makeup as you can. Cake it on your face. Guys need it too.
• Step 04: Egotistical attitude. Your shit needs to smell like roses; that's how awesome you think you are.
• Step 05: You need a name from/for myspace.
• Step 06: Talk shit all the time when online. Use Myspace. Don't do it face to face, or your emo hair will get ruined when you get curbed by that 350-pound, 6' 8" metalhead you decided to call a poser.
• Step 07: Buy or design your own necklaces.
• Step 08: Pick a furry as the new scene icon.
• Step 09: Join every online community you can and add everything to your favorites. You have to have a myspace with thousands of friends, and your profile must be private.
• Step 10: Straight guys need to "look like a faggot" and "act like a fag." The real faggots have to be transvestites. Girls need to look as "shitty as possible."
• Step 11: Start a trend. Example: douse your hair in your dad's cum and claim you "brought back AIDS."
• Step 12: Attitude (again), such as saying things like "don't hate me because you ain't me!"
• Step 13: You must be bisexual, because "liking one sex just isn't enough."
• Step 14: You must be skinny. Take a lot of laxatives; anorexia is bad because you're always hungry, but bulimia is "a win/win situation."
• Step 15: Piercings inside of your penis/vagina.
• Step 16: You need to have a faggot who follows you around and wipes your ass when you go to the bathroom.
• Step 17: Fuck up every human language in existence.
• Step 18: Photoshop your photos so you look you're made of plastic or look like a corpse. If you're ugly, stay inside. Photoshop only works on the internets.
• Step 19: You cannot claim scene.
• Step 20: To be scene is to be fake. Reality is not an option.
• Step 21: You must become an hero. NOW! RIGHT NOW!

Part 1 Part 2 Removed. Google his name for backup videos. here it is!

[edit] Scenesters who need some internub flame/fame.

• xXPrincessPunkXx - If this bitch is gonna be part of the future democracy of America [she's from Canada, but same shit anyways], we're fucked, since she's so full of shit she wears it as eyeliner. LOL WUT? No more video; was pulled apparently. WE'RE BACK IN ACTION!

• Steven Strazzullo - Video also pulled. Pussy... [SOMEONE BETTER FIND THIS VIDEO!]

• Anyone on Jeffree Star's MySpace Friends List.
• This foppy-haired fruitcake. There are way too many positive comments on his videos. Plz troll immediately.

SLOTTR-HOUSE hXcore! Is it me, or did they get vocals from a meat processing plant? Either way, the above scenester is a trap, like most scene guys.

• this bitch. uuuugh.

note: vid contains nothing but screaming and facemaking. needs trolling, not watching.

[edit] The Final Solution

The only solution to this increasing problem of ridiculously dressed rich white kids is rampant decapitation unlike the world has ever seen. Scene kids are a lot like Highlanders except they have no talent, use or skill besides breathing YOUR air that YOU rightfully earned.

How to get the ball rolling:

1. Find a scene kid way older than he should be.
2. Pretend to care about the shitty band on his shirt and his imported beer.
3. Side with him that the worlds against you and the only way to prevail is to dress like a schmuck.
4. Wait till he passes out from his beer and two ZIMAs.
5. Find a rusty spoon and start hacking.
6. ????
7. Profit!

[edit] See Also

• Trepanation
• Emo
• Scenequeenmedia
• Vanity Is Perfection
• Preston
• Emoscene.com

[edit] External Links

• Scene Sucks A shockingly true documentary on typical scene life.
• MOAR SCENE BULLSHIT
• We Are The Mainstream Anti scene, emo, vampire, juggalo, idiot site.
• WATM's Scene Article.
• And another attack on scene idiots.
• In dire need of a raid.
• Typical scenester MySpace.
• www.emoscene.com
• Your scene sucks