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Rachel Marsden

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This page contains spoilers — Important plot secrets and/or conclusions may be revealed. For example,
HOLY SHIT Rachel is an insane & awesome bitch!!!1
At TOW 50% of people want to sleep with me, the other 50% want to kill me.
At TOW 50% of people want to sleep with me, the other 50% want to kill me.
Marsden in front of her sexual dungeon whilst Jimbo inside awaits punishment
Marsden in front of her sexual dungeon whilst Jimbo inside awaits punishment
With makeup
With makeup
Who is Xenu? I should have asked Greta..
Who is Xenu? I should have asked Greta..
Psychobitch style, I'd hit it
Psychobitch style, I'd hit it
In a million years time, this t-shirt will be used to make clones of Jimbo.
In a million years time, this t-shirt will be used to make clones of Jimbo.

Rachel Marsden is a dominatrix, FFA (because of Jimbo's beer belly) and a serial stalker. She also is was a newly hired host at Fox News.

In 1996, Marsden proved the power of the internet by sending her swimcoach porno emails. Seeing as he replyed tits or gtfo and their school was on a Unix based system, and therefore no images existed at the time, she got butthurt and decided to say he sexually harrassed him. After he got fired, he made it public, made the emails public, and got his job back, proving that women are liars. The fact that FOX hired her later is proof they know a good liar when they see one.

In 2004 she pled guilty to criminal harassment and was given probation. Her defense was that she did it for the lulz. This (among other annoying facts) caused problems when she got her own wikipedia article. People just kept putting the inconvenient stuff back in and Rachel kept taking it out.

So Rachel became the subject of one of the greatest revert wars in Wikipedia's history, involving scores of admins. The fight reached up the chain until Jimbo decided he had to get personally involved. One thing then led to another until she put out to thank Jimbo for helping on the article.

Meanwhile, the wikipedos had a massive Arbchat and decided that you couldn't write anything mean about anyone, ever. Pussies.

In July 2007, Fox News fired her bitch ass. The primary reason was that they found out she was really from Vancouver. This occurred during the daily Pledge of Allegiance to the Flag, when someone noticed that she didn't seem to know all the words.

In 2008 the logs of her and Jimbo talkin' dirty were leaked to some gossip site. Some argue that Rachel was the leaker.

On March 1, 2008, Marsden became the first woman in the history of the planet to be dumped on wikipedia. In ever-classy psychobitch style, Rachel retaliated by putting Jimbo's smelly garments up for sale on eBay. Included in the sale is a t-shirt smeared with Jimmyjuice.

Also, Jimbo banned Marsden

The Rachel Quotes

 
“ 		 
Maybe (Pakistani cricket fans) should focus less on cricket and a little more on hygiene.
  		„
 

—Rachel on Arabs

 
“ 		 
Al Gore could really pollute a bathroom.... Just look at the guy. If someone doesn't take away his pork 'n' beans, he's bound to get another one of those 'gut feelings' and mistake his own greenhouse gas production for science!
  		„
 

—Rachel on Global warming

 
“ 		 
Men with small penises can only manage one sexual position - the missionary - and it's not worth it just for a page on Wikipedia.
  		„
 

—Rachel on regrets

 
“ 		 
I suggest that you just relax and let me undress you, touch you.... If you want, you can undo the garter and take off my stockings, take off my lace bra and underwear, and let your hands explore my body wherever they want to.
  		„
 

—Rachel on Jimbo Wales

 
“ 		 
Your image is your calling card.
  		„
 

—Rachel on delusions of grandeur

 
“ 		 
Fifty percent of people want to sleep with me, and the other 50 percent want to kill me.
  		„
 

—Rachel feelin' bitchy

 
“ 		 
I WANT THIS ARTICLE TAKEN DOWN NOW. NONE OF IT IS ACCEPTABLE TO ME. IT IS A VIOLATION OF MY PERSONAL PRIVACY AND I DO NOT WANT THIS ARTICLE, OR ANY OTHER, EVER RECREATED ON WIKIPEDIA. I DON'T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT YOUR "COMMUNITY" OR CONCENSUS. IF YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THIS, ASK JIMMY WALES. -RACHEL MARSDEN
  		„
 

—Rachel going postal on her TOW talk page

Only one of these is made up.

Links

eBay



Rachel Marsden is part of a series on Whores.






Rachel Marsden
is part of a series on
Fox News 		Allies

Glenn Beck | Ann Coulter | Matt Drudge | Sean Hannity | Mark Levin | Joe Lieberman | Michelle Malkin | Rachel Marsden | Bill O'Reilly | Karl Rove | Rick Santorum | Rod Wheeler

Enemies of State

Anonymous | Al Gore | Barack Hussein Obama | Emos | EXTREMIST FAR LEFT INTERNET HATE GROUP | Fred Phelps | Hillary Clinton | Hugo Chavez | The Internet | John Edwards | Keith Olbermann | Liberals | Macaca | Mexicans | Logic | Osama Bin Laden | Rachel Maddow | Ron Paul | Stephen Colbert | Terrorists

Memes

Buy A Dog | Corruption of LOL | Exploding Van | HACKERS ON STEROIDS | INTERNET HATE MACHINE

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