New Mexico
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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New Mexico (moar like Jew Mexico - amirite?) is a piece of shit state located somewhere between Failafornia and Texass. There is absolutely nothing there except for Albuquerque, Injuns, Beaners, and an occasional alien or two. People call it New Mexico because not even OLD Mexico fucking wanted it anymore.
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[edit] History
At least 100 years ago some Indians (feather, not dot) who thought Mexico wasn't hot and dry enough, got lost and wound up in New Mexico. They eventually left due to a lack of lulz and an influx of white people. Then later the Mexicans came and started war with the whites, claiming to have "hecho le para los lulz." The Mexicans let the Indians back in, and they started casinos. Last Thursday, the white people moved back to make meth and retirement communities.
tl;dr - There was nothing then, there is nothing now.
[edit] Good Things About New Mexico
- Cheap as fuck houses.
- Most of the beaners are not illegal.
- Can drive alone at fucking 15 and a half.
- Can drive fucking fast, and extremely well, at all times of the day and night.
- All the Boy Scouts go to Boy Scout Mountain or Elephant Butte during the Summer so we don't have to put up with their shit.
- It doesnt rain, period.
[edit] Bad Things About New Mexico
- Too many injuns.
- Too many beaners.
- Not enough niggers to whip the shit out of, but that's not suggesting you should try in Hobbs or a certain scary street of the ABQ.
- Not enough Asians to do your homework for you, thus bringing down the average. Worst still, the Yellows in the state are mostly in the Triad.
- For the people who live there, they have to put up with Boy Scouts in the Summer. Some lulz gained when the fat shits wearing $300 "hiking" boots get lost.
- Almost as fail as Kansas for being LANDLOCKED and still having hurricanes and tornadoes turning most of the state into Atlantis. See for yourself
[edit] Famous New Mexicans
- Demi Moore
- John Denver
- The jiggaboo that hosts Pimp My Ride lived here before moving to the Fifth Circle of Hell
- Governor Bill Richardson, who tried/failed in the running for Democrats to some spade and skeezer, even despite the fact he worked for Hillary's puppet with a penis, and has literally done more for the country than either. Not that it had any effect on his state's budget at all. Technically illegal, but because his mom was shipped over the border to have him by his rich, white father, so it's a toss-up.
- Parts of oldfag bands like the broken-up At the Drive-In (mostly the gay parts that are in Sparta now) and The Shins.
- Conversely, shitty "Crunk" newfag bands like Brokencyde , named after the condoms their fuck-buddy parents bought being a seriously bad batch. But thankfully, we only spawned them - it's fucking MySpace and Canada that made them popular. be sure to thank your local 16-year-old Canadian girl someday.
- Noone else matters
[edit] See Also
| The United States of Encyclopedia Dramatica |
|---|---|
| States | Alabama | Alaska | Arizona | Arkansas | California | Colorado | Connecticut | Delaware | Florida | Georgia | Hawaii | Idaho | Illinois | Indiana | Iowa | Kansas | Kentucky | Louisiana | Maine | Maryland | Massachusetts | Michigan | Minnesota | Mississippi | Missouri | Montana | Nebraska | Nevada | New Hampshire | New Jersey | New Mexico | New York | North Carolina | North Dakota | Ohio | Oklahoma | Oregon | Pennsylvania | Rhode Island | South Carolina | South Dakota | Tennessee | Texas | Utah | Vermont | Virginia | Washington | West Virginia | Wisconsin | Wyoming |
| Not a state yet | Australia | Canada | China | Cuba | District of Columbia | Iraq | Israel | Japan | Latin America | United Kingdom | Vietnam |
