MySpace Trolls

[edit] Devil's Bitch

Danielspengies and Devil's Bitch are currently feuding.

IRL, she's a 26-year-old former hooker named Rain Stevens from Canadia. Her trolling normally involves spamming using sockpuppets and the typical flames. It is rumored that she stopped spamming over a year ago because her brain just couldn't comprehend the complexities of holding down the enter key for hours at a time. She was in a relationship with a former troll known as DLH, who feigned his own death to temporarily GTFO the trolling community. He has now returned, but really, no one cares.

[edit] DLH

DLH, or Dark Lord Hater, is the king of trolls. Not everybody likes him, but he gets deleted often enough for starting shit that he's earned his reputation. Some argue he has completed CSIII.

[edit] Theoneandonlysarj

Tyler's sockpuppet showing Sarj how it's done.

Sarj's (aka Patrick Bennett) trolling normally involves TL;DW YouTube videos all of 6 people watch and "spamming" of weak flames. He even uses an automated program to do it so he can crank out even moar fail. Sarj has a life.

[edit] Cujo

Cujo asking for buttsecks.

This guy's real name is Ron Pruett, and he is most famous for soliciting buttsecks OTI, and for being unable to distinguish the grammatical difference between the present and past tense of the word "sale." His trolling normally involves ad hominem attacks using sockpuppets. His girlfriend mods The Cutter Fan Club (a troll "group").

[edit] The Punisher of the New Breed of Hate

The Punisher of the New Breed of Hate is a 17-year-old pro-ana emo juggalo with Asperger's Syndrome named Joshua Frances Niebrzydowski (more liek Niggerzydowski, amirite??). If that and the cheesy name didn't tell you enough, this guy's best trolling attacks were along the lines of "you're gay" and "NO U". Mission: MySpace and a few of his fellow internet humanitarians contacted Niggerzydowski's school and threatened him with a lolsuit. Even the FBI was brought in. The kid literally shit his pants and almost got 2 years in prison for spamming and trolling MySpace forums, not to mention being banned from the internets at school.

[edit] The Rest of the New Breed of Hate

Nobody knows how many of these fucktards there are, but they fail miserably at everything they do (if the name didn't already give that away). Their "trolling" often consists of posting shit such as "BOW DOWN TO THE (PROFILE NAME) OF THE NEW BREED OF HATE". They have masqueraded as wrestlers, animals, and recently, even as a shemale. They often spam groups and can't come up with a simple inane flame. Not even NO U.

[edit] McKelley

He doesn't really troll much anymore, however, he gets baleeted for posting n00dz, and for being friends with the trolls.

[edit] Mr. Smith

Butthurt after being deleted, Mr. Smith screams fursecution.

This profile is disguised as a dog with an image macro stolen from ED. Many trolls use this alias, and share the profile for their raids.

[edit] The Rejected Prodigy

This guy's real name is Alex, and, despite his constant Bible preaching as a troll, it is suspected that he is an atheist due to his neckbeard. He's responsible for the card-like image of Devil's Bitch, and does a lot of Photoshop work. He has recently declared a war on Wicca after MySpace announced that they were considering removing "Wiccan" from the list of religions you could set on your profile, thus making the Wiccans already feel butthurt and somewhat perscuted.

[edit] Sir William McTavish

This guy likes starting flame wars and moderates troll groups. He often goes after religious groups, and has been known to show cock.

[edit] Cutter McCoon

Cutter may be a mole, not a troll. Screencap from M:MS.

Some argue this is a Sarj sockpuppet, but its posting style suggests otherwise. It posts hate speech, uses proper grammar, and is generally less infantile in its demeanor.

[edit] Auntie Social

Auntie Social is a female troll who is best known for starting flame wars. Some argue she is a transsexual or at least a member of pantykin.com based on her profile picture, but he/she consistently denies this.

[edit] Wan-Dum Fuk

This trorr hass exremery good Engrish and awrays uses caps lock. He normurry gets into frame wars in frorums and uses the phrase "No Tudor!" Is a reference to a Scott & Todd prank carr of the same name. (Thanks for that, Wan-Dum.) His pictua is the O RLY? owr. He is a skirred frame warria and insurts America at rist wan hunred times per account. He's a crossbrid of a trorr and an irrerret tough gai.

[edit] It's Not a Tumor!!!1

Tumor, butthurt after getting pwned. Screencap from M:MS.

This dude lives in Georgia and has the IQ of the average Georgian. He hates Mission: MySpace and gets extremely butthurt whenever he gets deleted for flashing his penis in various groups. The only thing notable about this guy is that he uses his real profile to troll - the same profile he uses for legitimate uses of MySpace.

[edit] Danny

Danny Hemachandra, a resident of Seattle and trolls the bodybuilding group as well as gay groups and posts links to shock sites. It has recently been discovered that Danny is in fact a homosexual, since he has openly admitted to enjoying Brokeback Mountain on his personal profile.

[edit] Rogue

Troll tits. She bitches about getting baleeted because she associates with the trolls, though she never actually trolls.

[edit] Lord Clean

Lord Clean.

He used to be the best troll out there on MySpace, that is, until Rob told MySpace to pwn him. Butthurt, he threw away a few final sockpuppet profiles before quitting MySpace.

[edit] Yucko

A troll in diguise as a clown. Often claims to be dead or undead. Not very persistent, just a minor nuisance. He is likely a 13-year-old boy due to his lack of maturity.

[edit] Ricky

This guy pretends to be a ninja but is a typical basement-dwelling atheist fucktard. His insults are inane flames at best and he was outed as an IRL pedo for hitting on some other troll's 16-year-old sock account. Based on his default picture, it is likely that he is also some sort of cosplay fucktard. A n00b at trolling, and he has shown no evidence of improving his technique.

[edit] Kain

After seeing one of Danielspengies' nude shots, Kain just can't contain himself.

One of the original myspace trolls, Kain, whose real name is Daniel William Wharton, claimed to be hot shit while simultaneously showing no ability to form coherent sentences, use proper grammar, or utilize any form of logic. After being constantly challenged and pwned by Sarj, Kain decided to GTFO when Danielspengies discovered one of Kain's jaded ex-girlfriends. Soon after, pictures of Kain weeping in lulzy emo-like fashion were posted, and audio clips of him crying like a baby were unearthed. To this day, Kain refuses to show his face on MySpace, and instead curls up in a little ball at night, trying to pretend nothing ever happened. It is rumored he is a former member of Menudo.

[edit] Tyler

This guy is disguised as a 13-year-old wigger, and his trolling style mimics his e-fursona. He often posts regarding drugs, though the retard in his default picture obviously has no need for drugs as his reality is clearly fucked up enough as is.

[edit] Michelle

Michelle is constantly butthurt. Her meat curtains are spread wider than goatse, yet somehow she still thinks she's hawt shit. Danielspengies and Michelle used to engage in mututal flirting, but she immediately cut off the relationship after seeing Danielspengies' cock.

[edit] The Moles

Danielspengies often goes after other trolls.

Of course, there are trolls (or people outside the troll community who happen to be in the same groups the trolls are) who report their friends to MySpace for cyberbullying during intense fits of troll's remorse. For n00dz, see the gayllery.

[edit] Mission: MySpace

A butthurt Niggerzydowski after a bunch of profiles got baleeted. Screencap from M:MS.

Rob causing moar butthurt.

This guy is a troll in disguise as a homosexual internet humanitarian. His act has gone unchecked because MySpace loves internet humanitarians and anyone who tries to help them out. Danielspengies and Pure Hatred figured him out as a troll, but Rob denied it (just like his sexuality) and decided to kill 50 troll profiles in one day as retribution. This event caused epic butthurt among the trolls. In August, Rob posed as someone named Chase Colborn, with a shooped sign picture to verify his identity. "Chase" managed to pwn 37 troll profiles in one day. Rob gave up the act and turned to the dark side. He is now organizing troll "raids" on groups, primarily secks-related ones. However, he is still in the closet.

[edit] Danielspengies

Danielspengies Fails at getting N00dz.

Danielspengies (aka Steven Newcomb) is a 29 year old disabled stay at home dad from Sacramento. Initially a LiveJournal "troll" who made surgical efforts to insert himself into several ED articles, Pengies is what you get when you take a matter-of-fact anti-social, unemployed college drop-out with daddy-issues and chain his fat over-medicated ass to a computer for 12 hours a day. This man makes TL;DW videos on JewTube and pretends to be a pirate on MySpace, "raiding" groups but invariably getting baleeted. Danielspengies makes a practice of not only reporting other trolls who mock him but getting them deleted or having Rob do it for him.

All of this is done while flaunting his fat stomach and being proud of his mental retardation and despondency.

[edit] Jude's Army

Theoneandonlysarj offering to paint Jude's Army's pictures.

Sarj and The Id in a flame war.

The flames continue...

The fighting escalates.

Though she was really a fake, she managed to go undercover into some troll groups, only to report them. She was equally hated as Rob/Mission: MySpace among the trolls, though she stopped reporting as many toward the end of her "career".

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