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From Encyclopedia Dramatica

Saint Louis is a city in eastern Missouri (moar like "Misery", amirite?) populated by niggers and and their white overlords. Prior to the erection of a coat hanger, it was called the Mound City due to the strange and mysterious mounds of dirt piled in nearby Illinois by Indians who dissappeared for the LULZ.

St. Louis City is separate from St. Louis County. So they are two different counties identified easily by what part of town looks like shit less.

Contents 1 Weather? 2 Transportation 3 Educationz 4 Violence and the Police 5 Awful Shit That Has Come Out of St. Louis 6 Cool things to come out of St. Louis 7 Places to go, People to see 8 Sauces

Weather?

WHAT DA WEATHER GON BE?!?!?! RAIN RAIN RAIN COLD AND RAIN. THIS IS ALWAYS TRUE. ALWAYS.

Transportation

Due to cutback by the Metro Transit system, the best way to get around town is by psychic levitation since Metro does not go to nearby Madison County in Illinois (for fear of being sued), St. Clair County in Illinois (for fear of black people), St. Louis County (black people), St. Louis City (Mayor Francis Slay...oh and black people), Jefferson County (rednecks), Franklin County (rednecks), or St. Charles County (Lori Drew and rednecks), you cannot take the bus or train anywhere.

Because the transit system is bullshit, travelers usually enjoy the airport with the LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG runway that is 8 miles long. They can also enjoy Union Station, a train station that became a mall, but it now just a mostly empty building. (YAY PROGRESS!)

Educationz

The childrenz in the city theyz not be learning. School board is shit. The parents act like 13 year old boys and 16 year old girls.

Violence and the Police

North St. Louis City has the most violence. Some criminals are dumb enough to go into St. Louis County where an undercover cop is likely to kill them for carjacking, robbing 16 year old girls or just being a dick.

Contrarly, if they do make it back into the city, the new chopper records the well deserved ass kicking, and it becomes a civil rights issue. Never mind the son of a bitch shot a police officer, stole somebody's iPod, and raped some kid. LAUDY! THAT'S OPPRESSION!

Awful Shit That Has Come Out of St. Louis

• Megan Meier and Lori Drew
• Archbishop Raymond Leo Burke
• Highway 40
• Shit Transit System
• Nelly
• Chingy
• Huey
• Jibbz
• Cedric the Niggertainer
• Randy Orton
• Rams

Cool things to come out of St. Louis

• Meth

Places to go, People to see

• The Gateway Arch Can't go there. No bus service.
• Busch Stadium home of the St. Louis Cardinals Can't go there. No bus service.
• Forest Park where there is free admission to most museums Can't go there. No bus service.
• The Climatron at the Missouri Botanical Garden Can't go there. No bus service.
• Laclede's Landing Can't go there. No bus service.
• Delmar Loop Can't go there. No bus service.
• Union Station Can't go there. No bus service.
• The Hill Can't go there. No bus service.
• The Muny Can't go there. No bus service.
• The Pagent Can't go there. No bus service.
• The Fox Theatre Can't go there. No bus service.
• St. Charles where Lewis and Clark landed Can't go there. No bus service....why the fuck would you want to go here?
• Alton, Illinois, the most haunted city in America Can't go there. No bus service....also shit
• Six Flags Over St. Louis Can't go there. No bus service. Also...the shittiest theme park in the union
• St. Louis Public Libraries Can't go there. No bus service. Also the fucking city is broke...so no books. :("

The MetroLink can take travelers to popular destinations nowhere especially since Highway 40 is under construction rich people don't ride the train so it goes places like Clayton, Westport, Creve Couer, Ladue, St. Charles where poor people can't walk or take the bus to find the "Jew Gold" because people are generally kind to each other and accept people for who they are greedy bastards who don't give a shit.

Sauces

• St. Louis City
• ZOMAGAUD! WHITE PEOPLE! - Never mind, just Goths
• Intelligent pricks you will probably end up working for - Good luck getting into college here without a silver spoon in your mouth.

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