Lockerz.com

From Encyclopedia Dramatica

This is how 4chan now looks.

Doesn't help.

Lockerz is an attempt at wacky viral marketing and social networking. It is by far the most maligntant form of cancer to strike the internets so far. Lockerz is a secret website that is members only but can give you lots of fun prizes for doing nothing! Despite what people say it is legit because you can look at images of people with their prizes! If you've logged on the internet you have no doubt hear of Lockerz because no matter were you go from Neopets to Facebook to 4chan it is impossible to escape the cancer that is Lockerz.

4chan Before Lockerz

We all remember the July 2008 Times Magazine article where moot said, "Spammers don't even bother to spam 4chan"? Well you knew he was wrong because Kimmo Alm was busy spamming AnonTalk.com there. The only thing else was 4chan.js and Grawp-style posting links to vandalized Wikipedia versions, but these weren't true spam in the sense of commercial advertisements.

Before Lockerz hit, Kimmo Alm was in the lead with 50% of 4chan's posts being his spam. Only during sporadic outbreaks from whenever 4chan.js mutated into a new form had anything exceeded Kimmo's spam, during which 4chan would get flooded so badly that over 90% of their content was infectious 4chan.js spores. So in essence, Kimmo was winning the contest of who could spam 4chan the most...

Discovery

No one knows when it first hit, only a short wile ago we can recall hearing about Lockerz once or twice a week. The website was still in beta so no one knew what has happening, it was invite only so everyone wanted to see what it was... Then the shit hit the fan.

It may not have started at 4chan first, internet scientists are working furiously to discover which regions of the internet were first hit by Free Lockerz Invitations (FLI). Any message board had at least one thread from one gullible moron trying to get people to accept his invitations, as time went on many more appeared. Like the lazy crackwhore that 4chan is, sleeping around with other websites bringing back content and stds it brought back another disease. Unlike most this could not be cured by s simple shot of penicillin, it was worse, it was... terminal.

The First Patients

If, of course, the mods aren't lube deep in a CP thread.

All the sudden it was impossible to refresh a page on /b/ without seeing a thread for invites to this horrid site. People posted the thread in their own ways, no unity was found in the posts. In simple terms, this was not the spam bot 4chan is used to, it was worse. A legion of retarded teenagers flooded the boards all asking for people to accept their invites to get points for fabulous prizes! This was at first small and not that big of a problem, sure it's annoying but not near as fast as a spambot. It was fine for a short while..

The Cancer Goes Malignant

It seemed fine at first with only a few spammers, things were good. The deadly part about Lockerz is that it grows just like AIDS. The website operates as a pyramid scam, the more members you invite the better things you get. One newfag invites another, those two invite two others, those four invite four others, eight newfags, sixteen newfags, thirty two newfags, and on and on until we get in the thousands. The few spammers we could put up with were now a full fledged force. The mods like snipers could pick off a few but not the full onslaught, worse yet there was no soup to be had.

The Cancer Kills AIDS

If you've been reading AnonTalk's bulletins, you'll hear Kimmo complaining all the time about how his traffic keeps going away. This is where it is going. His spambot can't keep up with the spambots funded by Lockerz.com's billionaire CEO.

Hit refresh on 4chan's frontpage. Now, every single time you will see lockerz spam! Usually, it's multiple times.

According to people who have actually gone into the site, it's some kind of pyramid scheme and they sell all your personal information to advertisers and identity thieves. Lockerz will only describe itself in vague, scammer terms like, "Lockerz.com is a brand new site that rewards you for just about everything you do. You can earn points in 3 ways: 1. Logging in each day. 2. Answering the question of the day. 3. Referring new members." And they claim you can them redeem the points for prizes like ipods, which some people of generation Z would kill themselves to get.

Lockerz itself has gotten so bad, not only does it spam all of 4chan, but it even has flooded every single part of the internet with spam, even AnonTalk and AnotherTalk.

External links

• Operation Lockerz: Insurgen.info raid!