Keith Olbermann
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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Keith Olbermann is a liberal old media troll beloved by hipsters and hardcore partisan Democrats everywhere. He is currently the host of the dedicatedly left-wing political show, Countdown with Keith Olbermann. Think of it as the Daily Show, only more srs, with even moar unfunny jokes and ratings that are in the shitter among most demos. He also really, really hates George Bush. In this, he is something of an antithesis to Bill O'Reilly; whereas Billo uses lies, blind party-loyalty and fear-tactics to promote all things Republican, Keith uses whining, name-calling and hokey sentimentality to promote hatred of all things Republican. Calling him a journalist has and will continue to cause RAGE in many people.
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Early Career
Prior to getting work as a pundit for MSNBC, Olbermann was mainly employed as a sportscaster. In 1998, after having a mental breakdown at ESPN, he got a job with Fox Sports as an anchor and did the play-by-play for several world series games. One day in 2001, he decided that he'd rather voice long-winded comments about Guantanamo Bay instead of Mark McGwire's steroids. He was hired by MSNBC, and did bitch-work for 2 years before they realized that Phil Donahue's show sucked ass. The MSNBC Gods promptly fired Donahue's ancient ass and gave the time slot to Olbermann, who started a show called Countdown: Iraq to push MSNBC's anti-war propaganda. After Americunts ended up invading Iraq anyway, they changed the premise to the rage-filled Bush bashing and O'Reilly trolling that we know and love today. Olbermann routinely displays his metaphysical math skills, as he is dedicated to demonstrating how having one-half of O'Reilly's ratings actually means his show is more valuable to advertisers, citing something about ages 25-54 being "more important".
Countdown to the End of the World
Countdown is the soapbox Keith uses to spew his anti-conservative rhetoric. He consistently and accurately debunks every single thing that Bill O'Reilly says, no matter how insignificant, since no one else wants to. He is so obsessed with Bill O'Reilly (who he calls Billo The Clown) that he makes a point to mention him on every episode of Countdown. Every Countdown ends with a reminder that it is the "day (x) since George Bush declared "MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!" from the deck of an aircraft carrier in the Persian Gulf."
Unlike Billo, Olby does not have guests with opposing viewpoints on his show to scream at. His lineup of "usual guests" includes about 10 people from Newsweek and Time, editors of obscure leftist newspapers, an idiot ultraliberal GWU professor and Joel McHale.
Speshel Comments
| —Olbermann |
At the heart of the 30 Rockefeller Center, buried within an electromagnetically sealed vault crafted by Akashic monks harnessing pure essence of STFU and embedded in Kryptonite sits Keith's liberal stick of +10 summoning, which he uses to converse with the great Quezacotl about the coming of Catnarok. Their published conversations are known to the rest of the world as "Special Comments". Speshel Comments is a periodic segment on Countdown when Keith does his best Zero Punctuation impersonation and rants for an entire 10 minutes of airtime about how much (INSERT SOME RANDOM REPUBLICAN HERE) fails. Watching Olbermann special comment for prolonged periods of time has been known to cause dizziness, autism, homosexuality, goatse, herpes, furry lust, AIDs, and hatred for all things Republican, the latter of which he probably intends.
Drama
Keith Olbermann vs Lou Dobbs
| —Keith, villainizing others |
| —Lou Dobbs, telling Keith Olbermann to get back in the kitchen |
Red Eye talking about Ann Coulter trolling Olbermann
Keith Olbermann got all butthurt after Ann "Cunt" Coulter pointed out that he received his diploma from Moo School instead of an Ivy League institution. He also thought that it would be a brilliant idea to play "show & tell" with his diploma on national television, so that everyone could see his deep-seated insecurity.
Yes, My Show is Crap, Please kill it!
Last Thursday, Bill O'Reilly started an online poll to get Olbermann's show removed from MSNBC. Olbermann completely failed to realize that O'Reilly was fucking with his stupid ass and to show his support for his favorite pundit, Olbermann and the entire staff of his show signed the petition live, on the air. Olby also took a number of jokes O'Reilly had made out of context (because Olbermann is incapable of distinguishing humor from serious statements).
External Links
- Herr Olbermann gets pwned by the jewy Jews of the Anal Dicking League
- Countdown on MSNBC.com
- Biography on MSNBC.com (lol look at teh pic)
- Daily Kos contributions
- The Countdown Blog - A blog by his crew and others who work for them. God bless their souls.
- Olberman circle jerk on Tumblr
- Creepy fanboi site that breaks down his every word and movement
See Also
- Retarded Olby Fanboy Faggots
- Billo The Clown
- Stephen Colbert
- Professor Glenn Beck
- Rachel Maddow
- Seth MacFarlane, fellow leftard and close friend
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 Keith Olbermann is part of a series on Fox News | Allies
Glenn Beck | Ann Coulter | Matt Drudge | Sean Hannity | Mark Levin | Joe Lieberman | Michelle Malkin | Rachel Marsden | Bill O'Reilly | Karl Rove | Rick Santorum | Rod Wheeler Enemies of State Anonymous | Al Gore | Barack Hussein Obama | Emos | EXTREMIST FAR LEFT INTERNET HATE GROUP | Fred Phelps | Hillary Clinton | Hugo Chavez | The Internet | John Edwards | Keith Olbermann | Liberals | Macaca | Mexicans | Logic | Osama Bin Laden | Rachel Maddow | Ron Paul | Stephen Colbert | Terrorists Buy A Dog | Corruption of LOL | Exploding Van | HACKERS ON STEROIDS | INTERNET HATE MACHINE |
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