Imperial Library
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
| STOP. You have violated the law! Pay the court a fine or serve your sentence. Your stolen goods are now forfeit. |
The Imperial Library, often abbreviated as TIL, is a forum dedicated to Elder Scrolls lore. Unfortunately, the forum spends moar time documenting their own fanon and "monkeytruth" than documenting canon. They tend to treat the theories that they've created as fact, and often treat the Internet as serious business.
Contents |
History
The Imperial Library began as Xanathar's Library. Xanathar (or Xan) created it in 1998 as a place to store what he believed to be knowledge and lore. He then proceeded to use the library as his personal Elder Scrolls play-pin. Eventually , Xan got a life, got married, had secks, and created children. Due to the lack of spare time created by his wife and kids, Xan handed off the torch to his apprentice Qwerty. In 2002, Xan returned and rename the site the Imperial Library so that new users would associate his name with the crap on the site.
The Epic Three
The Epic Three are the three epic beliefs that all TIL hold close to their hearts. They are monkeytruth, CHIM, and bullshit.
Monkeytruth
Monkeytruth is any forum post created by TIL's patron saint Michael Kirkbride, or simply MK. These forum posts were created during the making of The Elder Scrolls, but they were dropped in favor of moar sensible ideas. Unfortunately, the forumgoers refused to let go of their ill-based beliefs.
It's referred to as monkeytruth since they were supposedly created by a ape-man prophet (no, really, I'm not making this up). These usually come in the form of vague, cryptic, and incomprehensible text. Most readers tend to asplode after attempting to comprehend the documents due to the reason in their heads wanting to GTFO, but there are a few who don't. Those that survive the outburst of reason lose any common sense that they once processed and become easy targets for assimilation into the TIL collective (just as MK planned).
CHIM
All TIL members believe in CHIM, which is a concept that no one understands. Still, TIL members stand firmly under. Apparently, one must understand CHIM in order to achieve ascension or enlightenment. MK shamelessly use this idea in order to brainwash TIL members into become Scientologists.
Bullshit
Bullshit is the ideas that parents tell their children not to believe, but MK fools forumgoers on TIL into believing. Even many newcomers tell them otherwise, TIL members refuse to believe that bullshitting is synonymous to lying.
The Storyboard
The Storyboard is the forum on which TIL meets, discuss, and debate the game. Nevertheless, they phail at this. Despite the fact that their forums are based upon the games and their spin-offs, TIL members do not believe in any of the canon presented in the game. Instead, they want to comfort canon according to their beliefs in the Epic Three. In fact, they disregard all the events of The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion since MK only had a minor role in its development, and therefore, the game did not meet TIL's standards of divine text.
Roleplaying and fanfiction
| —Average OOC roleplayer, (source) |
As people who take The Elder Scrolls too seriously, TIL members love immersing them in roleplays and fanfiction. In these works, TIL members would write about their wild fantasies of being a character in their favorite game. Unlike other fanfiction sites such as Elder Scrolls Fanon, TIL actively critique and offer advise on other users' work, which results in users actually improving.
 Roleplaying on TIL explained. Hooray! |
 Ionith: The Serpent and the Dragon, a TIL roleplay. |
TESF Commentary
The TESF Commentary is TIL's Storyboard's largest and longest running thread. It was started by Stephen Dedalus (aka Sload) on May 25th, 2008, in order to BAWWWWW hard. Sload's epic whailing caught the attention of everone else on the forum, who also had the constant urge to BAWWWW. Sload was upset that TIL beliefs were not upheld outside The Imperial Library, so he decide to complain and rant about how much the official Elder Scrolls forums sux (and it truly does).
This thread is also home to TIL forumgoers who love trolling the Official Elder Scrolls Forums. These wannabe trolls would sent hours boasting about their suppose epic achievements. These achievements include "infiltrating" the Official Forums, despite the fact that anyone can create an account for free. Despite these "infiltrations", an "I'm in your base, killing your d00ds" event has never occurred.
TIL users also use this thread as a substitude for 4chan. In fact, they claim that it is better than 4chan. Since 4chan is terminally ill with cancer, being better than them is not that hard to accomplished. The usage of memes is common in this thread. Of course, certain meme-users such as Sload confuse Yotsuba with Wikipe-tan, so it is doubtful that these are experienced /b/tards. As a result, it must be concluded that TIL users are really newfags who copy old memes and forced memes in order to appear Internetly-cultured.
 So-called Storyboard "scholars" confuse Yotsuba with Wikipe-tan. |
 Stupid troll and attention whore invokes lulz. |
 TIL compares itself to 4chan and uses the age-old newfags can't triforce meme. |
Criticism
Persecution
TIL is intolerant of ideas contrary to their own. Any attempt to speak out against them is met with pubic execution. All those accused of not believing in the idea of bullshit is arrested, tested for STDs and AIDS, and thrown in gaol.
Isolation
Like North Korea, TIL is known for isolating itself, so foreign believes cannot be absorbed by its gullible forumgoers. The Internet meets strict censorship. Community-driven, free speech websites such as Wikipedia and ED are blocked. Concrete walls and demilitarized zones prevent users from escaping to freedom.
Failure to meet UN regulations
TIL continuously refused to follow international law. CIA photos depict warehouses full of WMDs and woman getting stoned to death. The UN has released 9000 ultimatums to TIL for the last hundred years, but TIL called their bluffs each time. TIL could always count on France to back down and surrender.
See also
External links
- Imperial Library – the infernal site itself.
- The Storyboard – TIL's official forums.
- About – TIL's take on themselves.
- Temple Zero Society – A challenger appears.
| Imperial Library is part of a series on serious business |
Internet Law • Internet disease • Internet drama • Internet stalking • Identity theft • Irony • Free Speech • Swatting • Operation Falcon Punch Serious People & Organizations |
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