Gundam Wing
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Yet more animu faggotry. Much like DBZ, most anime fans have been at some time hooked on Gundam Wing. Especially if they claim to be a “Gundam Fan”. “GW” is essentially the abridged (See: bastardized) edition of the anime “Mobile Suit: Gundam.” Which is itself a painfully long Mecha drama that centers mostly on whiney emo boys, pedophiles, raging dykes, and some pimp named Bright Noah whose backhand apparently outranks everyone anywhere ever. Instead of something interesting, this series is all about teh gay pacifism. Five teenage boys who run away from their creepy old owners and detest blowing things up with the ugliest giant robots that aren’t from Evangelion. It seems the only good character in the show is Wu-Fei with his sexist remarks, and his arms which are fire breathing dragons.
The creators of the show were so unoriginal that instead of using names, 60% of the Gundam BOIS's names are numbers. Duo = two in Mexican, Trowa = three in English, and finally, Quatre = 800 in 300. In fact, the other two Gundam pilots have number names too - Heero is derived from the Japanese number "one", and Wu Fei's name has the symbol for the number five in it, so not even THEIR names are very original. The show recycles 2 frames per second shots of toy robots swinging weapons with obviously recycled sound bits that fit no particular situation, yet they are masked by the unimportant context for which said action is warranted.
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[edit] An Heero Yuy
This character is a suicidal emo who fails to kill himself no less than three times. He is either in love with, or hates, Relena Peacecraft... a whore whom he repeatedly threatens to murder but never actually does. Heero's most famous line is "I'll kill you" said in a total monotone because he doesn't have a personality. His gundam turns into Starscream, and has a ridiculously hax beam rifle.
[edit] Duo Maxwell House
The only actually interesting character, Duo is like what a /b/tard in a mech would be like. He calls himself the god of death, wears a priest outfit, fucks shit up at random for no reason, makes stupid jokes, and has never had a haircut. He's gay for Heero if the fangirls can be believed. He's also retarded. His gundam is a giant nigger with a light saber on a stick as a scythe.
[edit] Not Trowa Barton
An emo with bangs over 9000 feet long that cover one eye, so he can fight without the handicap of depth perception. Like most Japanese RPG characters, his motto is "...". He doesn't even know what his real name is, and his famous line is "I have no name. If you must call me something, call me noname. Everyone says he's an amazing pilot, even though all he ever does is plant himself in one spot and spam his machine gun until he runs out of bullets. His gundam is bright red and orange for camouflage, and gradually adds more and more ridiculously huge gatling guns as the series progresses. Also, he's a circus clown.
[edit] Quatre Rabarre Loser
A pacifist emo fag who pilots a giant death machine. His motto is "we shouldn't be fighting at all!" Quatre is a blond haired, blue eyed arab with 19 sisters, all of whom are more manly than him. He becomes cool when he goes crazy and tries to kill everyone, but sadly comes to his senses when Heero fucks up his shit in a Mercury. He also has 40 sweaty men who look like actual Arabs, call him Master Quatre, and do whatever he says. His Gundam is designed with heavy armor since he's to retarded to get the fuck out of the way.
[edit] Wu-Fei
This character is the most ridiculous of them all. Boasting to be the most powerful with the motto “You WEAKLINGS!”. Early in the series he scares away a pack of wolves that surrounded him by yelling "GET AWAY FROM ME YOU WEAKLINGS!!!1one" He is also is super stereotypically asian: His real name is Chang. His Gundam's arms are terrifying dragons that bite and breathe fire. During his mission to kill Treize Khushrenada he sees that Treize has a sword and wants to duel him. Wu jumps out of his gundam wielding a katana. After losing to Treize Khushrenada he becomes emo and calls himself weak for the rest of the series until he meets with his sensei in outer space.
[edit] Sex Marquis/Milliard Fillmore
He wears a bucket on his head so he won't have to look himself in the mirror. He has long blonde hair, and he actually fixes Heero's gundam for him, just so he can blow it up again. Later, he reveals that his true identity is Millard Fillmore, Relena's brother, and proceeds to stalk her for a while, then decides to drop a huge battle ship on the earth. He doesn't pilot a gundam, but instead goes through several high performance stupid giant robots, ultimately trading the Tall Goose in for the Epeyon, a red thing that looks like a devil and doesn't even have any guns.
[edit] Fan Fiction
Gundam Wing Final Battle is a fine example of the typical Gundam fan's writing ability. Also, it pretty much sums up the plot of every Gundam Wing episode evar.
[edit] Rating
- Action: “OMG! It’s a Gundam!” *dies* X49
- Lulz: 1, when the main chick dies
- Gayness: somewhere between Naruto and buttsex.
- Mecha: -5 The movie version wasn't much of an improvement either. The only difference was that they gave the characters fairy versions of their Gay-Bots
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Gundam Wing is part of a series on Anime. |
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Categories: Anime | Stub
