Garry's Mod
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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Garry's Mod is a Half-Life 2 modification. It was created by the most brilliant British coder who goes by the name of Garry, who made an ugly interface on top of Valve's engine that took him 11 versions to get it right and left the community to do the rest. The primary use of Garry's Mod is to entertain creative people. Unfortunately, a majority of the community is under the age of 12 and most of the time not creative.
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Mingebags
Mingebags are Garry's Mod's version of a god. A typical mingebag devotes his life to delivering lulz and making 12 year olds cry on Garry's Mod servers. Here are a few ways a mingebag does this:
- Spawn (and ignite) huge objects until the server crashes.
- Make prop spawners of giant objects and spam them until the server crashes
- Delete everyone's objects.
- Rope everyone's objects to the ground.
- Spawn an object and cover it in propcannons that fire propane tanks, aim at ground and fire until server crashes
- Kill everyone until he gets smacked with the banhamer or everyone leaves
- Spawn a dumpster, flip it upside down, and cover peoples objects
- Constantly say something like "YOU'RE HACKING YOU FUCKING FAGGOT LEAVE BEFORE THE ADMIN BANS YOU", "why the FUCK was i just kicked?" or "YOU PIECE OF SHIT IM GOING TO RIP YOUR HEAD OFF AND SHIT DOWN YOUR NECK"
Experienced mingebags are to be praised for their amazing skill unlike their typical 13 year old boy counterpart. The underage b& Mingebags use their microphone CONSTANTLY, raping everyones ears. They are comprable to skiddies in a raid.
Ways to get kicked or banned from a server
- Join a server.
- Spawn a jeep.
- Shoot people with the guns given to you by the game.
- Throw explosive shit around, since the guns do nothing.
- Go away from the keyboard for more than two seconds.
- Walk around throwing grenades for fun, when two of them happen to hit the admin's whorehouse he was building and set it on fire.
- Go to a Noxious Net server and ask about how Jetboom harvests rcon passwords.
- Use any of Garry's Mod's features, besides walking, on an RP server.
- Tell the kid who won't stop complaining about someone throwing a prop at his ragdoll to kindly shut the fuck up.
- Be a cool, level-headed guy.
- Build something that launches shit.
- Build something original and kickass.
- Don't buy CSS. Despite being a 12-year-old wankfest, half of the shit in gmod shows up as either a gigantic red ERROR model or a black-and-purple seizure-tastic eye rape.
- Have a sense of humor.
- Have fun.
- Build something that doesn't use Wire Mod.
- Ask for help on how to use things as you play Gmod for the first time.
While similar to the above section, this is the rulebook for cool kids who are new to such overwhelming levels of faggotry.
Multiplayer
Garry's Mod multiplayer is intended to let players play together and share contraptions. Instead it has become the Detroit of the Multiplayer world, because anything you make can be removed by the feared REMOVE tool. Some people use prop protector to save their props, but minges will always find a way provided with enough time. Most sessions end in a war where the minge and the server's population kill each other over and over again.
But in other cases of this clusterfuck they call Garry's Mod Multiplayer, There may be no problem when someone joins a building server full of intellectual people with goals of construction. But of course any kind of harmless shenanigans(like giving Alyx balloon tits) will be frowned upon by the server-goers and the offender will be deemed not fit for the server and booted.
Warning: You will have exactly 2 minutes to finish up a contraption when a mingebag arrives.
DarkRP
Most Servers that use a third party game mode are using DarkRP or some other shitty RP mod. -RP allows you to pick your your job and buy/sell things etc., be a furry that class got removed thank god, or pretend to be a member of the opposite sex in order to perform oral sex on Mayors/Cops for lulz/money. It is not as cool as it sounds, it is in
fact a demonic creation of Satan. DarkRP in Garry's Mod is the next worst thing to Minges. Every DarkRP server has the same thing going on:
- People love being cops so they can ruthlessly abuse you and defilate you.
- Everyone loves going to the gun shop so they can buy a gun that they'll lose in 2 minutes, and use it to kill everyone they see in sight.
- Many people are under the impression that they are the admin of the server and tell you to get out. Unfortunately, they are all fucktarded 12 year old children.
- "DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU DESU" is a popular responce for JOB
- Almost no real roleplay at all.
- Mods who offer you the illusion of something to do other than watch people put a basket on top of a table. You will be given a physgun, but not be able to spawn props, then you will be taken away the physgun, mess around with the GG, and then be banned for a finite amount of time. If you ever complain about why the server is so boring, you will be called an RP noob and then permabanned.
Don't even think about going onto Taco N Banana unless you want to be banned within 10 seconds for making the most simple mistake in spelling or grammar. Other communities sometimes have loads of drama or they are full of assholes, such as HGN whom the leader payed a hacker $150 just to steal a shitty script from another RP community.
Warning: Anyone who plays RP for more than 43 seconds will have a seizure
HOWEVER, RP servers are the easiest to troll since it's players are mostly consisted of 12 year olds, usually resulting in epic lulz
Ragdoll Posing
Garry's mod allows you to use a special gun to pose ragdolls into different positions. The most common of them is the genre of "sex poses". Sex poses are commonly made by mingebags due to the fact that that is all that fucktards ever think about. These sex poses are usually posed with Dr. Kleiner (an old man) and Dr. Judith Mossman (an even older woman)doing it doggie style.
Face Posing
Another feature Garry's Mod include is face posing. This allows you to make people have different expressions. The only problem with it is that fag Garry made it so that every face pose looks like the person is having an orgasm.
As A Source of Creating Drama
While one can do many fun things with Garry's Mod like your favorite Rule 34 of Alyx and Barney, there are some better things you can do, such as recreations of tragic events. For example, in a perfect example of too soon, a totse member re-created the dramatic events on the day of the 7/7 2005 London bus bombings mere hours after it had happened:
| —Cybernetico doing it for the lulz |
 The original thread; complete with seething hatred |
 Animated summary of Cybernetico's post |
JBMod
JBMod is also an Half-Life 2 Modification, which allows you to make Sex Poses and lift shit with a blue gun. It's a Garry's Mod Concurrent born on SomethingAwful, but it's really worse than Garry's Mod - You can't even use any SourceMods Features. Garry keep upadting it and he win. JBMod is ONLY used to make sexual poses on GM_Flatgrass, an empty lulz with green around. JBMod think they'll sell their own software on Steam for 20$! But who will even want to buy a GMod Remix to make sex poses with people having their clothes on ? Maybe Mingebags. That's the only solution to get get Mingebags Off of GMod.
 The worst poses ever. Would MingeBags leave GMod if they discover this? |
 HOLY SHIT I HAZ NO AWARDZ!11 :( |
Gallery
 Nigga stole my Bike! |
 Zeno clash content. |
 11 Year old child gets a lesson on puberty that he will never forget. |
See Also
External links
- The Official Garry's Mod Website
- Facepunch Studios
- Garry's Mod, inevitably, meets a failed meme from back in the day.
- Yes, the worst mod ever is trying to kill Garry's Mod: JBMod.
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