G
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
4chan's technology board, /g/, has increasingly become one of the more frequented boards, with /b/ and /v/ becoming more mountainous piles of shit that somehow manages to digest itself into shit2. It used to be one of the more serious boards on the site but has started to decay into a state of constant flamewarfare and OS dick waving contests, caused mostly by /b/tards and /v/irgins seeking refuge from moot's faggotry.
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/g/ culture
If you haven't guessed yet, the main userbase that inhabits /g/ are hyper-elitist angry nerds. Remember that permavirgin kid in high school who would never shut up about his latest Linux distribution, or how much he overclocked his processor, or his retarded libertarian views, or tell you how much he hates Microsoft and spells it with a Micro$oft? Now imagine a place where all those angsty kids meet with anonymity, and BAM! you have /g/: an Internet tough guy super-nerd forum.
OS wars
The most common types of threads that occur on /g/ are constant battles among the three OS groups:
- Mac OSX users: Annoying cult-like artfags who hail Steve Jobs, and don't know any computer skills other than drag and drop. Would gladly take out a second mortgage on their house for the next mac. These are on the bottom tier of users on /g/. Windows or Linux, BSD or Plan 9, everyone agrees that mac users are faggots.
- Windows users: Constantly defending their buggy spyware-ridden OS by claiming that "I never get any viruses, spyware malware, bugs or anything" which is as ridiculous a statement as saying you have never been Rickrolled or lost the game.
- Linux users: Saying that Mac and Windows users are all n00bs who don't know how to use a REAL OS. These computer experts will use the most obscure Linux distribution built from scratch on notepad, not because it will do them any good but rather because its so ass-backwards to use; therefore making them HARDCORE.
- BSD users: Nobody actually uses BSD; users of all OSs just like to spam it to troll everybody else and watch the ensuing RAGE.
- Plan9 users: Nobody pays attention to Plan9 users. They can be seen trying to convince any one who doesn't use plan9 to switch so they can take advantage of "that cool networking thing."
Vidyacard wars
Things like 1.7%, wood screws, Q1 2010 Q2 2010 , whirring noises and other such phrases may be used while referring to Nvidia. This is due to Nvidia being a bit behind on their latest series of cards while ATI had a successful launch. Therefore it's over, Nvidia is finished.
- Origins of 1.7: Charlie Demerjian, a reporter for a tech rumor site reported that Nvidia only had 1.7% yields on their latest GPU. Basically, this means that for every 1000 GPUs produced, only 17 are actually functional. This rumor is of course unconfirmed but still amusing.
- Origins of Woodscrews: Nvidia, in its desperation to make their stockholders believe that everything was going as planned, made a crude mock up of its new card for a big presentation. Numerous tech sites called bullshit due to the visible wood screws drilled right into the end of the card as well as other absurdities.
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Headphones
/g/eeks like to think they're audiophiles by saying which low-cost headphone sounds the best, i.e. if you don't get PortaPros you're a faggot. What they don't know is if they didn't spend so much money on their computers they could have a real sound system and not resort to cheap $30 headphones. This argument is so frequent that it has been suggested that /g/ be renamed to /headphones/.
Desktop Threads
/g/'s only real cancer. It mainly consists of neckbeards, Tidus, 13 year olds, and raging faggots posting their latest Blink-182 wallpapers and crappy rainmeter skins. It inevitably descends into an OS/application flamewar (LAAAAAWL U UZE FURRYFOX (LOLOLOLO) WUT A FAG I UZE SAFIREY CUZ IT IZ RLY FAST AND SAEF)
Computer Builds
The worst of /g/. Includes ten year-olds asking which dell pre-made their mom should buy to tech-school dropouts, with, of course, their mandatory newegg screenshot, asking whether they should go with ASUS or Gigabyte, "brah." Common quotes include: "I only have 300 bucks, but I need it to be capable of running Crysis on 4x AA, wut do I change?" and "HEY I NEED A NEW COMP OKAY?? IM THINKING OF A DELL GAMING LAPTOP WHAT DO YOU GUYS THINK?? MY MOM SAID I CAN ONLY SPEND 3,000 BUCKS WHAT DO I BUY???" Ultimately it's best to just ignore such threads or politely ask, "But will it run Crysis?"
/n/ reborn
Due to the abundance of libertarian faggots on /g/, any and all news about the government introducing or increasing funding to a socialized program or doing something that can be misconstrued as taking away individual rights is instant troll material. If you want a good example of this, post the following copy pasta on /g/ with a picture of Ron Paul at about 1 PM (central time zone):
| This morning I was awoken by my alarm clock powered by electricity generated by the public power monopoly regulated by the US department of energy.
I then took a shower in the clean water provided by the municipal water utility. After that, I turned on the TV to one of the FCC regulated channels to see what the national weather service of the national oceanographic and atmospheric administration determined the weather was going to be like using satellites designed, built, and launched by the national aeronautics and space administration. I watched this while eating my breakfast of US department of agriculture inspected food and taking the drugs which have been determined as safe by the food and drug administration. At the appropriate time as regulated by the US congress and kept accurate by the national institute of standards and technology and the US naval observatory, I get into my national highway traffic safety administration approved automobile and set out to work on the roads built by the local, state, and federal departments of transportation, possibly stopping to purchase additional fuel of a quality level determined by the environmental protection agency, using legal tender issued by the federal reserve bank. On the way out the door I deposit any mail I have to be sent out via the US postal service and drop the kids off at the public school. Then, after spending another day not being maimed or killed at work thanks to the workplace regulations imposed by the department of labor and the occupational safety and health administration, I drive back to my house which has not burned down in my absence because of the state and local building codes and the fire marshall's inspection, and which has not been plundered of all its valuables thanks to the local police department. I then log onto the internet which was developed by the defense advanced research projects administration and post on freerepublic and fox news forums about how SOCIALISM in medicine is BAD because the government can't do anything right. |
Counter Pasta:
| This morning I was awoken by my alarm clock, powered by energy generated soley by Southern California Edison and manufactured by the Sony Corporation.
I then took a shower in my house constructed by Centex Homes, sold to me by a Century 21 real estate agent, and mortgaged by Citibank. After that, I turned on my Panasonic television which I purchased with a Washington Mutual credit card to a local NBC Corporation affiliate to see what their team of hired meteorologists forecasted the weather to be using their weather radar system. While watching this, I ate my breakfast of eggs and bacon, both produced by a local farm and sold to me by my local grocery store, and took my prescribed medication manufactured by Pfizer, GlaxoSmithKline, Astra-Zeneca, and Novartis. When my Motorola-manufactured Cable Set Top Box showed the appropriate time, I got into my Toyota-manufactured Prius vehicle and set out to my graphic design workplace and stopped to purchase some gasoline refined by the Royal Dutch Shell company, using my debit card issued to me by Bank of the West. On the way to my workplace, I dropped off a package at the local UPS store for delivery, and droped my children off at a local private school. Then, after spending another day not being maimed or killed at work thanks to the company-mandated standards enforced at my workplace, I drive back to my house which had not burned down in my absence because of the high manufacturing quality of the products inside and of the company which built my house, and which has not been plundered of all its valuables thanks to the alarm services provided by Brinks Home Security. I was able to rest easy knowing that even had this happened, I would have an Allstate insurance policy which would cover any damage to my home and anything that was stolen. I then logged onto the internet, financed and ran in part by various different private corporations such as Google, Comcast, AT&T, and Verizon, and posted on the Huffington Post and Daily Kos about how capitalism is the source of all evil in this country. |
If you followed the directions above, in about an hour you will have a troll thread with 200+ posts from all the libertarian faggots on /g/ bawing in unison. There is nothing more beautiful. And the best part is: it never fails. The last thread with this pasta (August 8th, 2009) reached 332 posts in 5 hours and 4 minutes. That's 1.1 posts per minute. Incredible, no other troll on /g/ has of yet broken this record.
DISREGARD THAT. On August 18th, 2009, 4 different threads with the above copy pasta were made, one having 235 posts, another having 60 posts, with yet another with 25 posts, and the last one with 24 posts, totaling up to 344 replies. Though, at 0.76 posts per minute over 7 hours and 28 minutes, it does not beat the speed of the last record.
This is proof that on /g/, this copypasta defies logic.
Tripfag Circlejerks
/g/ likes to show off their fancy tripcodes and make charts ranking the tripfags from god tier to troll tier.
/g/'s famous tripfags include:
- RageistheNewSage !!7RhNVYjQ2Y/
- King of /g/
- Captain Spicard !mOdChRomEs
- Assistant to rage.
- ATI HD4770 !nh/w4IW6TE
- Slightly more of a cool guy than the above.
- Mei !8800gtx15A
- Female tripfag that trolls with a picture of Alisa Kuzmenko cutting up a dog.
- FURRY FAG !CCSa1FURRY or !s4Audiofag
- King of desk threads and resident audio guru with a dislike of Logitech speakers and headphones. Always has great advice for building your own sound system.
- Skunkworks !e1337Hykks
IRC Channels
Since no one on /g/ can get along, there's a lot of IRC channels:
- On irc.rizon.net (Shit channels):
- #/g/tech
- #/g/tv (You will get banned the second you join. Srsly.)
#/g/loli- #techloligy.
Channels nobody cares about, but they still exist:
- On hurr.irc.su (What the fuck is going on in here channel, full of traps and faggotry):
- #hurr
NO MODS ON /g/
Unfortunately /g/ isn't exempt from the 4chan lifestyle. Like the other boards on 4chan, there are NO MODS ON /g/.
Due to the lack of moderation, /g/ has become a shithole. Between the Anontalk spam, the Lockerz threads, the gay porn dumps, the loli dumps, and the troll threads, /g/ is only a shell of what it once was. Once in a blue moon will you find a actual discussion about technology, however these are rare occurrences as they quickly go off topic with mentioned gay porn and loli dumps, let alone the trolls and know-nothings.
REPORTING THREADS
98% of the time when you report a thread using the "Rule Violation" option, your report will go ignored. Most reports under "Illegal Material" are quickly dealt with, but if you report something that is not illegal (EG: anything other than CP) you will be B& for abusing the report function. Ironic isn't it?
- The best way to report a thread is to post the offending thread in #4chan on irc.rizon.net. Annoy the fuck out of the moderators until one acknowledges you. Moderators are the users with ~/@/%/+ in front of their name.
Copypasta
| I'd just like to interject for a moment. What you're referring to as Linux, is in fact, GNU/Linux, or as I've recently taken to calling it, GNU plus Linux. Linux is not an operating system unto itself, but rather another free component of a fully functioning GNU system made useful by the GNU corelibs, shell utilities and vital system components comprising a full OS as defined by POSIX.
Many computer users run a modified version of the GNU system every day, without realizing it. Through a peculiar turn of events, the version of GNU which is widely used today is often called "Linux", and many of its users are not aware that it is basically the GNU system, developed by the GNU Project. There really is a Linux, and these people are using it, but it is just a part of the system they use. Linux is the kernel: the program in the system that allocates the machine's resources to the other programs that you run. The kernel is an essential part of an operating system, but useless by itself; it can only function in the context of a complete operating system. Linux is normally used in combination with the GNU operating system: the whole system is basically GNU with Linux added, or GNU/Linux. All the so-called "Linux" distributions are really distributions of GNU/Linux. |
