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From Encyclopedia Dramatica

Florida [more like ROFLorida amarite?] is less the wang of the United States and more its distended, infected,prolapsed rectum, - sort of like the US is giving Europe, Africa, and South America the goatse treatment. It hangs from the asshole of the US like a disgusting tail that should be cut off from the body at any cost. Corruption in Florida is systemic and was laid bare to the world during the 2000 election wherein W used telekinesis to make people vote.

Right up there with China, Nigeria and Eastern Europe, Florida's incorporation and fraud laws combine with a lack of cooperation with other states' investigations to create a safe haven for all sorts of predatory fucks with a front as legal businesses. Florida gains internets attention by being spam central. However, scamming in Florida has a long and sordid history that predates the Internet. Boca Raton once proudly proclaimed itself to be the telemarketing capital of the world with the joke that BR actually stood for Boiler Room. But it doesn't Really matter, since everyone in Florida is Blatantly Retarded.

It's not just spam, either. Huge numbers of pre-recorded telemarketing calls originate from Florida. Florida telemarketers can ignore the Federal TCPA that makes pre-recorded calls illegal, because the Florida AG protects, insulates, and accepts bribes from tele-marketers.

Fake sweepstakes aimed at the elderly show up in your mailbox? Likely from Florida. A too-good-to-be-true vacation offer to DisneyWorld or the Caribbean? A Florida cut-and-run travel agency. When you watch late night TV, start counting how many infomercials for investments, work-at-home or other get-rich-quick schemes have you dealing with someone in Florida.

It is also sometimes referred to as The Pedophile State because of the massive number of pedophilia crimes occurring there. Investigators suggest this be related to its penis peninsula. It could also be because it's just so damn EASY to steal a child from a Disney theme park...

It is a proven fact that Florida is also the cosplay drama capital of the world, and has been for at least 100 years. People such as Kim the Cheater, Pikabellechu, Tom Croom, and Maboroshi reside there.

Clearwater, the home of the Church o' Scientology, is located in Florida, only proving what dumb shits the Floridites are for allowing them a foothold in the US.

Along with being shaped liek a retard's dildo (PROTIP: It used to be shaped like an erect penis pointing toward Britfags, until all the old people moved down into it and made it hang limp), Florida is well known as the land of the dead, the cemetery without down payment, and a paradise for the retired dying waste that are baby boomers. The state is has over nine thousand seniors, which make it a fucking nightmare to drive anywhere, maneuver a cart through Walmart or even walk down the street. You can be sure if you live here that you will get to see many-a grey-haired fucker die.

When terrorists chose to attack America, they headed straight for the Huffman Aviation flight school in Venice, Florida. The school is run by a superjew named Rudi Dekkers. Who else would train them to fly without training them to land?

Although most American political thinkers agree on the necessity of eventually solving "The Florida Question," there remains disagreement on how best to go about it. While some advocate sealing the border, performing a tactical nuclear strike on the state's major urban centers, and then waiting for the inhabitants to die off over the course of time, groups like the ASPCA have argued that Floridians may possess an archaic form of self-awareness, thus raising ethical questions about such methods.

Fortunately, the Florida question will be solved by global warming, as all it will take is two more inches of rising ocean to drown this foul nest of old folk's homes and retard breeding forever.

Fact - An overwhelming percentage of people 14 to 40 in Florida are furries who populate furcadia with aids and typical furry bull-shit drama.

[edit] Aliens hate Florida

[edit] See Also

• Danny

• Jack Thompson

• Furrys

• Ryulong

• University_of_Florida_Taser_incident

• DJ Skeptik

• Katherine Harris

• Mark Foley

• Miami

• Pedobear

• Redneck

• Terri Schiavo

• Cocaine

• Negroes

• Shayla A. Muldrow

• The Mulberry Eight

[edit] External links

USA Today: Florida delivers sunshine and spam.

Bogus Boca.

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