Don Henrie

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azn, not undead

A picture of our vampire lord taken in 1996.

Separated at birth? You decide.

Retarded Don fan.

Don Henrie (more like Dong Henrie, amirite?) is a self important goth who tells people that he is an immortal vampire with far reaching powers of darkness. These powers include psychic abilities, blood drinking and trying to score fame and fortune while living off of his last remaining groupie's tips from stripping. He still claims to sleep in a coffin even though a jilted exlover didn't let him retrieve his from her home after they broke up and he hasn't had one for over two years (as of October 2009). This wouldn't have happened if "moving to Las Vegas" wasn't Don Henrie's code word for crashing at the homes of what ever women in the city are dumb enough to sleep with him.

It wouldn't be surprising if he hasn't had his name on the lease of an apartment or mortgage since he lived in California. It also wouldn't be surprising if his last legitimate job was sometime before the recording of Mad Mad House as angry goth women have been complaining about his freeloading since.

What sets him apart from the other members of the vampire community is his brief stint in a short lived reality tv show that aired on the Sci-Fi channel (Bring back MST3K!) back in 2004. Since then he has been trying to whore himself out on the sole draw that he believes he is a vampire.

PROTIP: When trolling Don's MySpace, ask for the purification ritual that he used to make his "birthmarks fall off". Demand it. If that doesn't work, talk about his crooked nipples. This will result in a shit storm of epic proportions as he will attempt to verbally sodomize you into submission.

Not A Real Vampire?

"I get sunpoisoning easily." That is why he was out in the desert sun, and why he now consistently has a tan [1] [2].

“	Don Henrie isn't a vampire, he's a douche bag.	„
—MemoryandDream

While this statement will have most of us screaming out "no kidding, asshole", there are a few others that take this issue more seriously. And these are the defenders of "true vampirism".

In many of his interviews, Don rehashes the same old information regarding the vampire community. Anyone with a computer can easily look up information on sanguinarian and psychic vampires. But apparently it takes someone who is not Don to actually get the facts right-- and by right, I mean reflecting the general opinion of the vampire/otherkin communities.

When he first "came out of the coffin" in 2004, he had stirred up a shit storm by declaring in many an interview that all self-proclaimed vampires follow the rules set forth by Michelle Belanger and Father Todd, the Black Veil, totally ignoring the fact that the community of blood-sipping weirdos predates their foray into LARP and White Wolf.

“	Tampons make better vampires than Don Henrie.	„
—Kambriel, goth doing it for the lulz

He stirred up shit again in 2006 when, after jacking off to the movie Underworld one too many times, he stated in an interview with Maxim that werewolves and vampires were at odds with one another, and that werewolves were the same as otherkin. This caused many a furry to scream out in rage, resulting in Don being shunned from their reindeer games. So now because of his inability to get "his facts straight", he is only taken seriously by club kids and producers of laughably cheap Halloween specials.

Pictures of him in direct sunlight have surfaced [3] [4], despite his claim that he can't move around during the day because of the "severe pain" sunlight gives me.

A Real Stand-Up Guy

Copyright Infringer

MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE... Photographer Forrest Black? Who cares, MINE!!

Don Henrie likes to think that he owns the right to images just because he is in them. But what he doesn't realize is that photographs and video are sole property of the photographer unless there was a special agreement in their contract. While he probably could intimidate and extort all he wants from small time photographers to get them [5] to give him equal ownership, this is hightly unlikely in the case of the Sci-Fi channel and other corporate entities that make their money off of their visual imagry. Don going around saying people can't use images from these sources essentially has the same weight of him saying they can't use an image these people took of something else.

Sci-Fi channel is a multi-million dollar corporation. Of course their photography belongs to me!

His opinion on the matter is worthless unless he owns the picture. This is how paprazzi can take pictures of celebrities and not pay them jack shit for them. If Don Henrie was a private citizen and not some schmuck that is roughly considered a "celebrity", then he could probably complain. But since that's not the case, he's SOL. He has no bearing on the matter and only if the big-wigs decided that people couldn't use them is when people would get in trouble for copyright infringement. Unless proper credit isn't given and some schmuck is claiming they own the rights to the picture and are using it in advertising or are somehow making money on it, then and only then would they have a bitch fit about misproper use.

None of the "haters" are making money off of the pictures photographers have taken of Don Henrie or claiming credit for them. The only person that is misusing images of Don Henrie is Don Henrie! He has used photographs he didn't have the rights for in advertising and until he got pwned by dA staff he had been trying to sell pictures of himself using the sites print option, even with pictures that he couldn't bully the photographers into handing over rights for. He has edited and reposted images without expressed permission from photographers, been lax at best when providing photography credits and claims sole ownership of images taken by the likes of Forest Black and the Sci-Fi channel. He will even claim ownership if another model (or in the case of Maury Povich, someone that is actually famous, who Don has deluded himself into believing would actually be honored to shake his hand) appear with him.

The Cult Leader

Whiney little bitch extraordinaire.

“	I feel there is a responsibility to make sure that we are taken seriously. Very seriously. And I will spear head that.	„
—Don Henrie

Break out the kool-Aid, his modeling agency is the next vampiredon.net

He aspires to be a cult leader and brow beats all his fans who aren't "loyal enough". Even though he likes to project a tough guy facade, he is really a whiny little girl that will complain about the many perceived indiscretions of his fans. One of the many examples of this is that even though he claims to be a vampire community leader, spokesperson and "iconic figure" he throws tantrums whenever a fan asks him about the vampire community or vampirism [6] (over a year later he has yet to supply his own FAQ as promised and the linked "interview" went nowhere).

This is because he doesn't want to do any of the work that actually goes into being a leader. He just wants to stand around and have people tell him how wonderful and beautiful he is while the only work he does goes into promoting himself. And by work, I mean convincing some hapless fan or his girlfriend to do it for him because he has never accomplished anything on his own.

His claims of going on TV to further the fucktarded vampire community, and not himself, are immediately shot down in the face of this. Anyone that doesn't see him for what he really is is a moron.

vampiredon.net, aka, The Cult of Don Henrie

Not hacked, lulz.

At one point Don's web page was a thriving internet community with enough emo tears and gothic poetry to make the members of H.I.M. slit their wrists in disgust. Something that was never discussed was that the turn over rate for forum moderators and site administrators was high. The general malaise and contempt that Don had for his minions was not revealed or spoken about until the last struggling days of his website.

WHORE. Liek, minna-sama, prease pay fol mah phone beer.

There were angry claims made by Don and Sarah that the site was hacked, and he was all too eager to direct his fanbase to attack those he thought responsible. Those he thought responsible changed daily and ranged from exlovers to rival figures in the vampire community to site members he felt weren't "devoted" enough to him. It was the straw that broke the camels back for many people in his circle of supporters. During this time, literally ALL of Don's strictly volunteer staff that he had running, designing and maintaining the place had left. Yes, ALL. Lulz.

The site never recovered from the "hack" (which was later revealed as simply a technical error on Don's part by several former staff members). Don had tried to move his empire over to Darkness Embraced, in a move that in kind terms could be called a covert hostile takeover. After trying to brainwash and bully the site owner, and generally trying to make her his bitch, she finally got sick of his shit and told him and his minions to GTFO.

Through this, he also continued to ask for "donations" and hand outs from people, assuring them that the money was going to rebuild his website to make it bigger and better than it was before. In reality, this money went to drugs, his phone bill and other expenses that can only be speculated on. As of now all of his websites have been shut down and none have been rebuilt.

Cult of Don Henrie

Sarah Lester is fucking insane.

Is it the crack or the AIDS that has made her so fucked up?

Whoops! Didn't mean to insult the vampires!

Ur nawt groveling hard enuff!!1!1

Why are you not as awesome as me?!	DON IS GOD!!! SPREAD THE FAITH!!	Finally, she shut her bitch mouth.	OH GOD I WAS HACKED. GIVE MONEY.
IT WAS NOT ME. HONEST.	MY GIRLFRIEND ROCKS. MY PHONE WAS DISCONNECTED.	I AM BADASS.	GIRLFRIEND = BADASS
"If there is any drama you think I should be concerned with email me".	PAY MY PHONE BILL.	I AM NOT HACKED, JUST LAZY.	YOU'RE AN IDIOT, MINION.
DON'T QUESTION YOUR MASTER. NOW I WILL SING BOBBY BROWN.

Paracon

Sarah got the brilliant idea that she and Don should host their own convention where Don would be the star, and where they'd invite a bunch of hacks to stand around to make Don look better in comparison. Disregard that, Paracon was originally under the control/the brain child of Carolyn Griffiths and Janice Oberding, alias Boo La La Productions. Don and Sarah had been acting like it was their convention from the start, when in reality they originally had nothing to do with it. Carolyn and Janice dropped out and handed over control so all that remained was Don and Sarah. Again, EVERYONE walked out on them. This is likely because Sarah was a righteous cunt that was desperate to get her muddy little paws on what ever fame she could bilk out of this event. She insulted organizers, potential convention goers (of Carolyn's Christian demographic) and participants and was a discriminating whore. After Don and Sarah were in total control, Sarah tried to blame a registration fuck up on Carolyn, but that bitch totally pwned her.

Sarah Lester was fond of claiming that the event would appear on HBO, A&E and Sci-Fi in the form of a documentary. While there is no doubt that each of these networks would show something of sub par quality, it is highly doubtful that these two drug addicts could actually put something together in a sensible manner that would be anything but poorly thought out self-promotion of themselves.

Without informing any of the speakers, vendors or ticket holders of the cancellation of the convention Douchebag Don and Slimeball Slut Sarah "took the money and run", much like they did for Don's web site. Repeated attempts for explanations have gone unanswered. Don and Sarah will delete comments made on their profiles made referencing the event or asking for refunds and continue to pretend like Paracon never existed.

Legacy of Black Dahlia

His ex-friend with benefits and current pin cushion of his current girlfriend is an attention whore by the name of Barbara, or as she likes to be called, "Black Dahlia". After Sarah Lester declared jihad on this woman Barbara shot back with a wide range of accusations that ranged from Don only drinks blood when a camera is on him to him having a small penis... the last everyone suspected due to his Asian heritage. While the truth may be disputed, it's not hard to imagine there being truth to her words as Don has a public history of being abusive to his adoring fan base.

Don's a douche, plain and simple	Barbara comments on Don's post	EVERYTHING Don doesn't want you to hear.	Brutal and lulzy honesty
What Sarah doesn't want you to know	An end in sight!

A celibate Swinger

When Sarah and Don started their relationship she claimed to simply be his "manager".

Apparently keeping their fucking under wraps has become old hat, as Sarah is dropping hints left and right that they are together. She's not yelling from the mountain tops "I'M FUCKING DON" (oh wait, she is), but it's still rather noticeable and painfully embarrassing to watch.

What's the icing on the cake is how only a year ago (as of October 2009) they both declared on national tv to not be attached to anyone, Don specifically saying that he was above relationships and sex (at the time mark 7:50). Sarah claims that she has been with Don (she calls him her boo) for two. Whoops! While they could say they were celibate together, it doesn't work out because on the Tyra show Sarah says that she thinks it's acceptable and NOT disgusting to have sex if you were in a relationship while claiming to be celibate ATM. If she was celibate at that moment then she wasn't in a relationship, or so she would have you believe.

Also, Don's Myspace relationship status is set to swinger. So much for forgoing fucking.

A Real Father Figure

In a rather long and drawn out rant about why she is so special, Sarah alludes that Don is her childs stepfather and that he is teaching him some top secret dark arts stuff like killing people.

Don The Star!

Worst Spokesperson Ever

That illegible text and premade button? Those are the extent of Don Henrie's promotion untill...

Now. Typical sociopathic Don.

Apparently Don Henrie is the spokes-model for a struggling model agency. You of course wouldn't know this, because they are the ones promoting him and not the other way around. The current extent of his promotion of the agency is minimal at best and what ever mention he makes of them is either to say that he is their spokes-model (and you should be impressed by this apparently) or to link to materials on their site that promote him. Knowing Don he'd probably try to spin this as promoting the company because he'd like you to believe people would be drawn to the site to admire him, but it's really just more self-promotion because he doesn't give a shit about the agency beyond what he thinks they can do for him. Besides, the only people that are being drawn to the site are Don's dwindling fan base and not industry professionals or potential clients of merit.

Any mention of the agency that isn't focused on himself is pitifully sparse and either sandwiched between his self-promotion or secluded to the bottom of his announcement, usually in two lines or less. The only place he talks about the agency is on his Myspace page, mostly in places with the smallest effort such as the status updates.

It could be argued that Don's Vampire Mafia Myspace page is his attempt to promote the site (where he gives himself and his girlfriend top billing over the owner), but it could also be argued that it's not in fact Don Henrie, since he can't possibly be 27 because he was born in 1975. Unless of course he's lying about his age. Also, making a separate "spokes-profile" for himself (if it is in fact him) is stupid if they're using him as a draw. There is barely anything about Don Henrie posted there, certainly nothing that isn't on his Myspace profile, and it's all updates for his agency. Why would his fans go there if they're interested in him?

In person at what few events he hasn't been shunned from, and what fewer he's actually asked to stand around looking like a vampire at (or what ever it is he actually does), nary a peep is ever heard from him in regard to the agency unless he's trying to impress people. But then he's not really promoting the company, just trying to look like a hot commodity.

Hopefully after reading this entry, he'll correct himself and actually do what he claims he is being paid to do.

TV Appearances

Don claims to be approached regularly by producers, directors and tv stations to star in their shows or appear in their documentaries about the vampire and goth subcultures. He also claims that the reason why this hasn't lead to fame and his face being plastered on billboards across the country is because he's "ethical" in his choices and will only take roles with merit or appear in documentaries that are down to earth and not the least bit sensational.

_{Maury obviously saw through the ruse and didn't buy it.}

_{Don exercises his acting chops in Abbey of Thelema.}

_{Don trying to get attention on Mad Mad House.}

_{Interview with Estoric Radio part 1}

_{'Interview with Estoric Radio part 2}

_{National Geographic Is It Real?: Vampires part 1}

_{National Geographic Is It Real?: Vampires part 4}

_{National Geographic Is It Real?: Vampires part 5}

_{"The Secret Life of Vampires", part1.}

_{"The Secret Life of Vampires", part 2.}

_{"The Secret Life of Vampires", part 4. Using pressure points to fake "psychic draining".}

_{"The Secret Life of Vampires", part 5.}

_{"The Secret Life of Vampires", part 6. With blood drinking!}

Previous Video | Next Video

Don has appeared in a couple documentaries on the vampire community, the most notable being Vampyres. It should be noted that, while this documentary set out to reveal the mystique of said community, it only furthered the idea that they are all a bunch of club kids, idiots and delusional morons with role-playing fixations. He'll probably blame his douchified persona on editing and not any real effort on his part.

He appears in Abbey of Thelema briefly as The Angel of Death. At the time he touted it as a major accomplishment, but when it was revealed to be marginally bellow the standards put forth by Manos Hand Of Fate he quickly shut his whore mouth and never spoke of it again.

He has appeared on the Tyra Banks show (watch here) with his girlfriend Sarah, who is apparently a vampire as well. Is vampirism spread by osmosis? Regardless, the episode was following after one on the subject of the popular vampire-themed series "Twilight". Despite presented himself in a rather romanticized fashion, he was obviously shaking like a leaf at being on the show. His appearance was the basis for Vampir in the South Park episode The Ungroundable.

Other

Don appeared in a music video with his ex "soulmate" Michelle Belanger. Despite from the front woman's brutal vocals that are so flat they are reminiscent of the brown note and predictable lyrics, it is argued among trolls that the song itself isn't that bad. What makes it utterly laughable though is the shitty video Michelle produced for the band staring herself and Don, playing the roles of seductive and lithe vampiric seducers.

Aside being treated with the sight of Don slobbering on some crack whore's neck, we are presented with a band that looks like it would be right at home at a German homo erotic S and M expo. With their "fashionable" get-up, make-up and a surplus of leather and chainmail, they surely are the envy of every mall goth's Hot Topic fantasy.

_{"Shadow Dancer" by Urn (more like train wreck by Urn amirite?)}

Here he dims his lights, points his webcam at his flexed abs and breathes like a sex offender into the mic.

Don responds to ED

His responses are reflective of two of his coping mechanisms: the first being utilizing his fan base to attack his enemies, the second being trying to scare "the normals" into believing he has supernatural powers and can influence karma.

You are doing a favor to existence by adding to this article, and therefore exempt from karma.

Following in DivineAngel's footsteps of "troll trapping", he claims that he posted this thread for the lulz, just to see how long it would take for someone from ED to post it here. What he hoped to accomplish by this, other than looking like a retard, is unknown.

BAWWWWW

Not on drugs, Don? O RLY?

Edits Don has made to this article.

moar

Interview?

in a recent interview, we managed to delve into the mind of this superdouche and see what really made him tick.

ED: So, Don, you must be a big Dungeons and Dragons fan? (lol)
Don: What?
ED: next question. so, how do you feel about the current state of the goth subculture?
Don: One, it's a culture, you ignorant fool. two, there's too many posers.
ED: Hmm. like yourself?
Don: don't make me feast on your kidneys, mortal.
ED: guess what? i don't have any! HAH!
Don: WTF?

Don Henrie, Internet Tough Guy

Last Thursday, some /b/tard noticed that Don Henrie has lopsided nipples. Because eh's a cool guy who trolls faggots and doesn't afraid of anything, Frankie commented on the picture, hosted on Myspace:

“	Hahahaha. Has no-one else noticed that this guy has lopsided nipples? Also, Why would you be telling everyone that you are a vampire if you really were?	„
—Frankie

This ruffled Henrie's feathers, and led to this TL;DR, yet hilarious response:

“

From: The Vampire Don

To: Frankie Date: 16 Apr 2009, 02:04 PM Subject: I noticed something...

That you like to leave fucked up messages to certain people that can display just how fucked up someone could really be to fucked up CHILDREN such as you that live far away in aussie land thinking that they can get away with fucked up little things that they say while they are safe and sound in aussie land behind their tiny computer screen that their parents provided for them. Little do they know that their son just fucked with the wrong person that has connections in the myspace legal department that would do just about anything for a person that they might regard to be excellent in stature society wise as compared to some fucked up EMO ass scrawny underfed cheeks sunken in never gonna find love til your FOURTY years old, parents supporting you on your creative future spun out drug habit while they get a notice from a legal department that handles things that their son had created due to his own god damned stupidity in his actions of messaging someone while they saved that message and the previous one as well that was related you punk as motherfucking think you are clever little BITCH.

This is the first message and warning that you will receive. The next message will be the deletion of your little MYSPACE account. This will happen without warning, and though you may find it fucked up, You can go and FUCK your self.

And another thing.

If you want to take this to a personal level, there are much worse things in this world that many people would gladly do for me in such a case of annoyances such as you LITTLE one.

My hand reaches farther than you realize.

IP addresses can be tracked, of one was able to get their hands on them, and in this case... Furthermore, I believe that you can get the picture from here.

Or maybe you would like to just have a lot of people ruining your day and making you not want to ever come to this form of media again.

So just chill and think of what I am saying to you before you create more of a shit storm than you need for you and your family.

I have been waiting for a little fish like you to torture in ways that you would never imagine.

~Until then

P.S. Go and fuck your mom, that is of you still have one. Maybe she died in some horrible car accident and I am making fun of her. Oh well... Right?

„

—Don Henrie, Lord of the Faggots

Alleged Shit Fetishism

Asking his fans what makes them take big shits. For real, omg o.O

Don has been accused by (obviously blind) girls who have had the misfortune of having sexual relations with him of being a shit fetishist. Apparently, his (verygoth) habits include listening outside of bathroom doors, walking in if the door is not locked, and playing with his own feces. Apparently, Don does not just suck blood. These selfsame girls have also affirmed that his undead penis is, in fact, of typically azn proportions.

Barbara (aka Black Dahlia) also has said that he likes to sit while peeing and sing songs about his dookie.

...the truth about the dark side.

Pictures

Gallery of Undead Beauty and Lust

Out of the coffin. (Moar like out of the closet, amirite?)

Don with a satisfied and happy fan.

HE SEES INTO UR SOUL

AZN!!

Some broad wants in his pants badly.	Demotivater	Only goth sluts think he's the shit...	Only freaks with herpes want to fuck him.
Isn't he beautiful?	How do I date raep?	Moar date raep to the left of the whores.	Who wears a suit bowling?
A brave sofa gave its life for this coat.	Don with Gina, who got sacked when Don hit the big time.	It should be noted that as a baby, Don not only suffered from Fetal Alcohol Syndrome, but Internet Disease as well.	Self-satisfied douche
big pimpin'	he appears with a former fellow meth-fiend	this time his "special friend" suffers from a bad case of internet disease	A love that was not meant to last...
Looks like someone has been hitting the meth again...	another winner	This is totally acceptable, normal behavior	He came just by touching her.
You'd think it would be hard to down grade, but he went from this to Michelle Belanger.	Case in point. Which he left for...	...this.	With Mistress Jezebel
He left "Nikai" for Sarah. Nice puberty beard, Don.	Someone needs to brush more and lay off the clove cigarettes.	Don with his pet cat, "Vicious" in '04. No word as to whether or not he ate the poor thing.	Feel mah fangs, little boy.
The "love child" of Liv Tyler and Marilyn Manson with a side order of being dropped on his head.	He hangs with such a sophisticated crew...	MC Vampire	Typical fantard, trying to fuck her TV because Don is on it.
Gothic Pajama party!!	He's coming out.	Cum to Butthead...	With other fail goths.
Moar fail.	Final Boss Form! Happy AZN Vampire!	...it can't rain all the time. Especially when you're in your cosplay get-up	"I bagged me a loli!
Don gets all the hot chicks.	Definitely azn ._.	Wait, where are his sunglasses? His parasol?	A brief summary of a crappy music video by a crappy band that Don Henrie appeared in, thus making it even crappier.