Cutting

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Show your solidarity with this userpic.
Show your solidarity with this userpic.
Remember kids, down the road not across the street.
Remember kids, down the road not across the street.
Cool kids take pictures of their sorrow.
Cool kids take pictures of their sorrow.
There are many choices in life. Cutters take the easy way out.
There are many choices in life. Cutters take the easy way out.
The cookie monster expresses his inner sad.
The cookie monster expresses his inner sad.
This is not correct.
This is not correct.
A way to show your everlasting love without expensive tattoos
A way to show your everlasting love without expensive tattoos
NOT attention seeking.HONEST.
NOT attention seeking.HONEST.

It hurts on the inside, so you want to hurt on the outside. That makes sense.


Mainly done by 16 year old girls and emos. 16 year old girls cut, cut, cut it away because they are usually rich, privileged, lucky, well-financed kiddies who just don't have enough risk in their life anything else to bitch about. Frankly any rational person should be disgusted that we even let these people open their mouths, let alone try and diagnose their stupid attempts at attention whoring as a "problem". We should let them play Russian roulette, and see if one actually fucking kills themselves, ridding the world of their butthurt whimperings once and for all. They usually try and suggest that the person mocking their stupid behavior is the one with the problem, but lets face it, if they were pretending to hang themselves 100 times we would laugh at them outright, and giving yourself stupid fleshwounds on the arm is NO FUCKING DIFFERENT.

It is worth noting that these people FAIL AT LIFE.

Remember kids, if you're trying for suicide, it's along the arm, NOT across the bones and you might want to use something sharper then your everyday dull butter-knife. (the quicker and harder the deeper! =] This method is often summarized with the catchphrase "down the road, not across the street."

IMPORTANT NOTICE: CUTTING IS NOT A NEW FAD. MIDDLE SCHOOL KIDS HAVE DONE IT FOR YEARS BECAUSE MIDDLE SCHOOL KIDS ARE RETARDS AND HAVE SEVERE EMOTIONAL PROBLEMS. But feel free to push them until they snap and become masochists, or at the very least, true emos.

Contents

[edit] Reasons to cut


The considerate cutter will be aware of the lulz potential of its actions, and thus will make as many hilariously emo posts as possible. Sadly, such selflessness is rare in today's degenerate world, with the drugs and the violence and the rap music, with the hipping and the hopping.

It should be noted that these whiny little emo pieces of crap have no real problems and that they just want us to feel sorry for them. Occasionally you will come across a cutter who claims to have been raped and/or beaten by drunken family members, or hear voices, or otherwise have a fucked-up life [3]. When this happens, other cutters will invariably assure them that they are perfect and that "everyone feels like this."[4] This contributes to a fair and balanced worldview which leads them into exciting and lucrative careers such as subpar actress and male prostitute.

[edit] Cutting in fashion

Cutting has become somewhat of a fashion trend, it goes along with the straightened hair and the tight clothes.(including arm warmers) If you don't cut then you're not an emo kid and all your other emo friends will hate you, and that could be just too much for your fragile mind to take (See Suicide). Richey Edwards of Manic Street Preachers famously cut the words 4 Real into his arm just because he's so deep, true and hardcore. Some years later he disappeared and hasn't been seen since; that's even more hardcore. If you wish to become hardcore like him, listening to more cutter music is essential.

Bouncy whore Lindsay Lohan is apparently a cutter, prompting members of the LJ cutting community to attack her because "she's going to give cutters a bad name". Before this news broke they of course had a very positive public image.

A fucktarded Slayer fan cut the word "Slayer" into his arm and sent the picture for use in an album.

A hardcore Slayer fan shows his devotion
A hardcore Slayer fan shows his devotion

It also is a know fact that all My Chemical Romance are cutters. All that live now, all that have ever lived, and all that even considering being a Fan.

[edit] Ways to cut

  • Regular - Knife in right hand, cut on left.
  • Goofy - Knife in left hand, cut on right.
  • -mongo foot [suffix] – Cutting on the same side as you hold the knife.
  • The Disassociative - Think about cutting, wake up in the morning with scars.
  • The Wussy - Get a friend to cut you.

[edit] It's not working!

Cutting done in a fashion that would not accomplish anything; in most cases carried out by emos who happen to also be retards. While hardcore cutters find a way to cause actual harm even in the least ideal circumstances, emos somehow manage to fail even when the tools are readily available. One of the many ways to do it wrong. Cutting in this manner fails to get the desired attention, all it actually does is generate lulz for everyone but the cutter. It usually involves blunt objects or anything else that would otherwise never cut a wrist. Examples of such items are:

  • Motorazr (Confusing name, lol)
  • Spoons
  • A Spork
  • The wrong edge of a knife
  • A hair dryer
  • Ten gauge wire
  • The cutter's other wrist
  • The cutter's leg
  • Another emo
  • Your Mom
  • Mudkips
  • A Fall Out Boy CD (possible if you try hard enough, but most emos' muscles have atrophied to the point that they can barely lift the CD)
  • My Chemical Gaymance tee-shirt
  • Air
  • Poo
  • Banana

...fuckin' emos.

[edit] Negative effects of cutting

  • Pathetic psychological addiction. When communicating with a cutter, be sure to point out the obvious similarities between cutting and crack-smoking, as many cutters are virulently anti-drug (especially those who take drugs daily). NB Cutters will often claim to be addicted to cutting, because the added prestige of calling oneself an addict adds to the mystique. If you hear such a claim, then the best course of action is to offer the cutter some real drugs. Naturally, the world-weary cutter will respond by claiming to have "been there, done that", despite being only 16 years old.
  • Complete failure to ever grow the fuck up, even when you are no longer a teenager (see 21_gashes).
  • Hideous scars all over your body ensuring that practically no one will want to fuck you. I mean, if you bent over I'd give you a pity rape but I'm just in a good mood today.
  • You'll get AIDS all over your mom's good razor.

[edit] Positive effects of cutting

A fragile mind
A fragile mind
  • See smoking and crack.
  • Some girl might think you're cool and let you fuck her before she hangs herself over not being able to watch Big Brother.
  • Cutter females are incredibly easy to rape, for several reasons. Firstly, though they are not always fat, they are without exception weaklings, so they won't put up much of a fight in any event. Secondly, they are frequently losing consciousness from massive blood loss and exorbitant drug consumption, which obviously makes things a lot easier. Thirdly, they generally have incredibly low self-esteem and equally low intelligence, so you can smack them around and have them choke on your cock daily and they'll think they're being showered with affection. It just goes to show that there is a purpose for all of God's creatures.
  • If you die, the world will become a better place!
  • Tenfold increase in the number of long-sleeved t-shirts owned(Just as well, because they're gonna be wearing them for a long time. Scars are for life, and by age 21, their arms begin to resemble a Cadbury's Curley Wurley).
  • Lulz for everyone else.

[edit] How to Troll Cutters

  • Tell them it's "just cultural". It is.
  • Tell them that "starving Africans don't cut, because they gots REAL problems."
  • Tell them that it's just another teen fad and that they'll grow out of it
  • Ask how old they are/what music they liek, then act surprised when they reveal that they are 16 years old, and liek Fallout Boy (thus proving that it IS purely a fashion statement). Cutting and Emo go together liek Acid Techno and Horse Tranquilizers.
  • Call them attention seekers. When they respond by saying that they NEVAR show ANYONE their scars, ask them why the fuck they put their ghoulish bullshit on YouTube. (NOTE: this only works if they're actually ON YouTube)

[edit] Cutting Gallery


[edit] See also

[edit] External Links

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