Console Wars

From Encyclopedia Dramatica

The Console Wars is a ruthless civil war that has torn Yugoslavia apart with carnage and bloodshed for some time now. The conflict is between fans of the X-Box, Playstation, and whatever 1337 thing Nintendo came up with this week.

Currently enjoying a meme run-for-the-money on /b/, Console War is a fanboi battle royale (with cheese) that largely involves gaylord, n00b /b/tards shooping an original macro that compared PS3, XBox and Wii consoles to an FN FAL OSW an M16 rifle and a Supersoaker, respectively (seen here), with anything they see fit (or not, as is usually the case with /b/) along with other assorted faggotry. Much misinformation about the Console Wars is argued regularly on AVS. See gallery below for hilarity.

The X-Box. (GET IT BECAUSE IT'S HUEG)

1 =The X-Box 360

[edit] =The X-Box 360

The X-Box 360 is made by Microsoft and works as well as everything else it's ever made. It is the size of a refrigerator and has a giant glowing green button that's actually a robotic eye that the Illuminati monitors you with. X-Box fanboys are D students who like to blow shit up. X-Box fanboys are normally sad, unwashed losers whose commitment puts Trekkies, Star Wars geeks, D&D Nerds, otaku, cosplaying otaku tards, Wikipedophiles, people on LiveJournal, furries, voraphiles, goons, Scientologists, and you to shame. They form secret societies that congugate in seedy message boards and discuss ancient occult secrets of which Halo is the coolest. Possibly the only lulz worthy consle, due to the fact that you can troll halo 3 fan boys by telling them that there will be a 9000th halo game. Jordan Kane is one of these people. He lives for the X-Box, but sadly, it doesn't live for him, as it is always breaking, making him extremely sad.

[edit] The Pisstation 3

Made by Japanese super-men to conquer the world, the Playstation can also be used as a blender, toaster, cheese grater, bong, and time machine. Playstation fanboys form the community which tends to be populated by people who are full of sad, unwashed losers whose commitment puts Trekkies, Star Wars nerds, D&D Nerds otaku, cosplaying otaku tards, Wikipedophiles, people on LiveJournal, furries, voraphiles furries, goons, Scientologists, wiggers, niggers, spics, and you to shame. They form secret societies that congugate in seedy message boards and discuss ancient occult secrets of which Grand Theft Auto is the coolest. The gaystation 3 has games such as Heavenly Sword, Lair and Resistance: Fall of man ( moar liek Heavenly shit, TLairible and Reshitstance: Fall of your cock, amirite?)

The occult broke away from Sony after GTA4 became a multi-platform title. People were enraged by this sudden decision to release GTA4 on other consoles. Funny how people expect the makers of a game that involves brutal gang warfare, hooker sex and backstabbing to have high moral values. Shortly thereafter the estranged fanbase returned to the Sony fold in order to sit around and scream about Metal Gear Solid ports while fingering their assholes to hentai pictures of Solid Snake.

The Gay station 3 lowered its msrp from $9001 to $400. But nobody will buy it for the hoilday season, because it's so fucking huge, and that people already bought their Wiis and 360s long ago.

[edit] The Nintendo

Nintendo releases a new crappy system every 25 seconds, and half the time it's just a lunchbox. Nintendo executives know this doesn't matter because Nintendo games are as addictive as heroin and Nintendo's fanbase is full of sad, unwashed losers whose commitment puts Trekkies, Star Wars nerds, D&D Nerds otaku, cosplaying otaku, Wikipedophiles, people on LiveJournal, furries, voraphile furries, goons, Scientologists, gooks, wiggers, niggers, spics, John Lenon and people who write Encyclopedia Dramatica articles to shame. They form secret societies that congugate in seedy message boards and discuss ancient occult secrets and which The Legend of Zelda is the coolest.

The Pokemon occult died last year due to poor ratings on newly released pokemon games, it has returned to what it was originally, training n00bs to become ninjas with wii-motes and plotting to take down the current leader in the console war.

Your typical console nerds.

Some retarded video done by some 13-year-old boy about a year ago, along with his faggot brother, who Ironically, calls the other person a fag at the end of the video. lulz

[edit] The Sad (Yet Hilarious) Truth

No matter what any fanboy tries to tell you, this is probably the most-balanced console war evar. If you could only buy one console, all you have to do is look at the options and games, and pick the one that is best for you. That's all there is to it. Probably the biggest lulz to be had from this war is the fact that the war is completely pointless.