BUY A SHIRT!
The ED TShirt Shop is open for business! THE WINNER OF THE TSHIRT CONTEST IS UP FOR SALE IN THE STORE! GET THEM BEFORE THEY RUN OUT! Click here to shop.



Cockmongler

From Encyclopedia Dramatica

Jump to: navigation, search
Original sighting
Original sighting
Cockmongler smiley, available on yahoo!
Cockmongler smiley, available on yahoo!
The Mongler wrangles with a potential monglee, as his former wrestling persona, Bob Backlund
The Mongler wrangles with a potential monglee, as his former wrestling persona, Bob Backlund
CockMomgler
CockMomgler
Father of Cockmongler. (Cockmongler's face has its own luminosity, and therefor has no shadow)
Father of Cockmongler. (Cockmongler's face has its own luminosity, and therefor has no shadow)
Son of Cockmongler.
Son of Cockmongler.
Daughter of Cockmongler.
Daughter of Cockmongler.
Female counterpart? Cockmongler's wife partner in crime
Female counterpart? Cockmongler's wife partner in crime
Negromongler?
Negromongler?
Cockmongler's Mexican cousin
Cockmongler's Mexican cousin
With his AZN relative
With his AZN relative

Richard C. Mongler resides in Drumheller, AB, Canada. He has a major "Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde" type personality. By day, he is Richard C. Mongler (The C stands for "Cox" he explains.) He is married to Kari Byron of the Mythbusters but by night he becomes "Cockmongler" and embarks on a ravishing travel throughout the world. Cockmongler has turned up in places all around the world such as Hong Kong, China, Moscow, Russia, and even places in Iraq and Afghanistan offering to please soldiers of both factions. But strangely Richard always ends up waking back in his own home in Drumheller no matter where he fell asleep. According to him, ever since his photo shoot for the "World's Largest Dinosaur" website for INSANE.jpg, he has had a split personality. The sightings have decreased recently which is reportedly because he is finally having sex with his wife.

Cockmongler previously had a career as a second-string pro wrestler under the name, Bob Backlund. Unfortunately his contract obligated him to far too much non-mongling related activities, and he was eventually fired on the grounds of being unable to abstain from mongling long enough to fulfil his contract. Some may argue, reasonably, that pro wrestling offers ample opportunity for nearly constant, unlimited cock mongling, so the real circumstances of his retirement are still dubious. Nonetheless, he has now taken up a full-time cock mongling career, since his departure from WWE (formerly WWF).

Contents

History of Grinman (Mr. Grinman)

PROTIP: Grinman is the greatest fucking trolling attempt success in the history of /b/. Smiling man doesn't count

Grinman likes to grin. Probably 'cause he's getting it in the pooper. What? If you were that gay JEW'd be damn happy too, amirite?

Cockmongler vs. Grinman

A very effective way of trolling 4chan's /b/ is to call the Cockmongler "Grinman" or "Smiling man". They all SHIT their pants at once, and induces many, many lulz. Anonymous will have an apoplectic fit:

 
 
For fuck's sake...

Alright, Word Of Power time. It's Grinman. Always has been, always will be. Not Cockmongler. I'm not saying this towards the trolls who've flooded this thread with Cockmongler shit - they've no hope already. I'm saying this for your benefit - the Anonymous onlooker. You may be new and know nothing about this yet, or you may be old and just plain ignorant. But it's not Cockmongler. It started a few months ago, and it's everywhere. Take it from me. It's Grinman. You don't have to believe me, but I recommend that you do. If you don't, just keep it in the back of your head...the last flickering candle of truth. He's the Grinman. Not Cockmongler. Have some Longcat too (not Cocksucking cat).
 


 

Alternative!
 
 
For fuck's sake...

Alright, Word Of Power time. It's Cockmongler. Always has been, always will be. Not Grinman. I'm not saying this towards the trolls who've flooded this thread with Grinman shit - they've no hope already. I'm saying this for your benefit - the Anonymous onlooker. You may be new and know nothing about this yet, or you may be old and just plain ignorant. But it's not Grinman. It started a few months ago, and it's everywhere. Take it from me. It's Cockmongler. You don't have to believe me, but I recommend that you do. If you don't, just keep it in the back of your head...the last flickering candle of truth. He's the Cockmongler. Not Grinman. Have some Longcat too (not Whitecat).
 


 

Other evidence of his grinmanship (we made that word up, copyright Encyclopedia Dramatica):

 
 
I have to admit, I find the level of faggotry amongst the newbs to /b/ to be disturbing.

In the old days, this board was built upon the reputation of such memes as grinman, pedobear, and happy negro. They were legends. They were the celebrities and emotionally and sexually abusive founding fathers of our great and oh so perverse democracy.

It hurts my tearful eyes to see the stain of faggotry that these newbs who are coming to this board now are bringing with them as they change the names of the very foundation upon which this place was set.

Cockmongler? I dont' know who came up with the concept of calling grinman cockmongler, but I feel that whomever this individual is they should be anally raped by a screaming black midget named Remco. Grinman has always been grinman, and in our hearts we can know him as no other.

He likes to grin. Nuff said.

I also feel in my heart that whomever is the real person behind this photo would agree with the older members of this board. Given the choice between being known as cockmongler or grinman, I am completely reassured that he would jump up to his knees, that same nightmarish GRIN crossing his features, and showed his disgust for the term "cockmongler" by feverishly grinning.

Yours truly, Anonymous.
 


 

The Mongler Strikes Back

The Second Coming (The girl trap on his left (for you the right) could mongle my cock any day
The Second Coming (The girl trap on his left (for you the right) could mongle my cock any day

In the year of our Raptor April 27, 2008, a few Anons at a comic-con in the land of Bagged Milk beheld the second coming of the Mongler. Two never before seen pictures of He Who Sucks Cocks were posted, spawning a massive thread on /b/ which was so undeniably epic that even the Mods could not deny its greatness, stickying it on the first page.

 
 
Sup /b/? So today was the Calgary Comic Expo. I went there with some friends, and it was pretty awesome. There were a lot of weaboos and furfags to troll, and we did so. Partway through, my friend left to go get some food, when he came back he told me he saw Cock Mongler walking around. When I went to go look I was surprised that it was in fact, Cock Mongler. While he is a little older, he informed us that he still does mongle cocks. Here's a picture I took

TL;DR Cockmongler is still lively and mongling cocks, just he's a bit older now.
 


 

—One very lucky /b/tard

Gallery

Cockmongler Sightings

External Links




4chanarchive has archived threads related
to this topic for græt justice.


Cockmongler is part of Classic Solid Chanspeak
          a series on Memes Fleeting Failed Not a Meme
Click one of the six categories to expand that category.
Time-Tested
Classics
A Cat Is Fine TooAll Your Base Are Belong To UsA Master Is OutA winner is youAn HeroBaby fuckBarrel rollBayeux TapestryBel-AirBitches Don't KnowBix NoodBrian PeppersBridgetBuy A DogCandlejackCatnarokCaturdayCeiling CatCentipede filled vaginaChuck NorrisCockmonglerCopypastaCreepypastaDelicious CakeDemotivatorsDesuDiabeetusDivide By ZeroDO IT FAGGOTDO NOT WANTDuckrollEpic Fail GuyEpic ThreadsFGSFDSGaijin 4KomaGeorge ZimmerGoodnight Sweet PrinceHA! HA! GuyHAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKSHappycatHappy NegroHow Do I Shot Web?I Am In Your Base Killing Your D00dsI CameI Has A ShuvelIMMA CHARGIN MAH LAZERINTERNET HATE MACHINEI See What You Did ThereOh god how did this get here I am not good with computerOver 9000ITTY BITTY BABY ITTY BITTY BOATJESUS CHRIST IT'S A LION GET IN THE CAR!LOL WUTLongcatMilhouse is not a memeMoarMudkipsNigga stole my bikeOh exploitableO RLYPedobearPool's ClosedProfitRaptor JesusReaction GuyRickrollThe Sandwich ChefSean ConneryThe Singing SharkThis Looks ShoppedWRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYOU ARE DOING IT WRONGZippocatZA WARUDO????/Profit
Ordinary
Memes
4chan bans4chan Stencils404 GirlAwesomeBIKECATBlockatielBorschtBroccoli DogBunny PancakeBuzzkillingCactuarCard CrusherCarltonChris HansenCovini C6WCreepy ChanDicks EverywhereDOUBLE NIGGERDougDSFARGEGGarfieldENGLISH MOTHERFUCKERF40PHFacepalmFrosted ButtsGaijin 4KomaGentlemenGordon the Pringles GiraffeHappy SnakeHouseHypnotoadI am LegendI GOT NORTON!I'd Hit ItINVISIBLE...I'm 12 years old and what is this?IS IT CAN BE HUGS TIEM NOW PLEES?Is This BattletoadsIt's a Trap!Jam It InJohn LockeKILL IT WITH FIRELaw 4 KidsMachine CodeMan The HarpoonsMario DrawingsMilk BagsMSPaint Relationship ThreadNanomachinesOM NOM NOM NOMParty HardPLEASE RESPONDPretty cool guyPush ButanPut Shoe On HeadRape ClockShitting Dick NipplesSlowpokeSpeedycatSpengbabSteel HeartsTeh ReiThat Fucking Catdelayclose.jpgTONIGHT WE DINE IN HELLUSB lineVespene gasWahaWeegeeWhat is Love?Why So Serious?Wrong Location NiggerX? In My Y?Yaranaika
Jargon and
Textual Memes
Bring Back SnacksBut who was xBumpClippitCombofagCool story broDrawhoreFixedFukken savedGrey AreaHA HA HA, OH WOWI don't think you have an X. Enjoy your Y.in before Xlurk moarNever forgetNewfags can't XNO UNobody CaresPic UnrelatedPosting in an epic threadRelevant to my interestsRules Of The InternetSauceStick It In Her PooperStop postingVerbose ThreadWeeabooWHARRGARBLWhere is your X now?X is not your personal armyX Y is X
15 Minutes
of Fame
360 kid4chan Battlecards4chan Gaming4chan Gold AccountApproval GuyAudioBeat A RodBecause of Parkinson'sBirdmanBoxxyChild AbductionBRB, CHURCHbrb, compromisedbrb, soupBrinks Home SecurityChin-chanCoolfaceDental PlanDick NeckDynamic EntryExtreme AdvertisingFeels good manFishing CatFlea Market Montgomery#fortuneGary OakGodhand EditGoofy TimeGrin ReaperGuess The MemeHi-tech military softwareHoly GrailHOW CAN SHE SLAP?!?I DIDN'T EAT THAT FUCKIN SANDWICH OR THE TOILET THING EITHER!I Has A BucketI need a price check ...I TOUCHED HIS PENIS!! OMGJosef FritzlJxcelDolghmQTime for a DickingChocolate RainLarge Hadron ColliderLeave Bond to meLINK MAH BOIIIIILOLCHAIRMavica SpriteMichael PhelpsMordorNevada-tanNod FlendersOctocatOh No You Didn'tOperation Falcon PunchOperation LIONCASHPerfection GirlPokepunsPower WristRAGEROW ROW FIGHT THE POWAHSFW PornShamwowSteve IrwinStingraySUP DAWGSwirl FaceSwitch police onTapestry DogTyrannosaurus ReichUninformed LisaVTEC Just Kicked In YoWhat is a man?Why So Exploitable?Woll SmothZach Braff Quotes
Close
But No Cigar
27Advice DogApples BearAsianfaceBig DogBillCAPS EAGLECOMBO BREAKERCool your jetsDancing OwenDick ButtDrama Prairie DogFUCK YEAH SEAKINGFurseisekiThe FuryGastonGETGet into the LoopGirugameshHai guyI AM BEOWULF!I don't roll that wayJack SpicerL-L-LUNAJACK!Living On A PrayerNavidNyoro~nObjection!oh shit i'm sorry i meantPost ending in 75 GirlRedtube RouletteRitaSHIT IT OFFShortcatSkittle NiggerStaredogSo cashTAP LADEDANS FISTON!THE BESTUNITINUWHEN I WASYou Laugh, You LoseYOU'RE A BIRD!
No.

Milhouse

Personal tools
Link to this