Celebrity
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
A famous person who may have received public recognition, beyond the internets or otherwise. Actors, sports heroes, serial killers, politicians, and cock sucking debutaints are all examples of celebrities. If a celebrity attempts to fap onto your face, you are obliged by law to enjoy it and to not struggle.
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Degrees of Celebrity
- A-list celebrity
Famous people who interest everyone. They are invited to all the cool parties, can command any salary they like for as little work as humanly imaginable, and are allowed to entice small boys to their lairs of pedophilia without legal consequence. Examples: Michael Jackson, Britney Spears, Hilary Duff, Brian Peppers and Scary Spice.
- B-list celebrity
People who are marginally well-known and mildly interesting. They must park cars at the cool parties and hire publicity agents to force the happenings of their pathetic, attention-hungry lives into our group consciousness. Examples: Teri Hatcher, Rosie O'Donnell, Michael J. Fox, Nicolas Cage, Tom Cruise, Gerard Way and Jay-Z.
People who are well-known only on the internets, also known as geeks or basement-dwellers. Internet celebrities are invited to cool parties when a piñata is needed. Examples: Your mom.
Celebrity Worship Drama
Instant drama is generated at any celebrity worship forum by suggesting the famous person is sexually deviant. All fans plan to mate with their chosen idol, so finding the celebrity's forbidden passion for basset hounds makes them ineligible as fucking selections is deeply upsetting. All celebrites are drug-crazed perverts, so this drama happens frequently and is sometimes backed up with photos, used condoms, and violated pets. Do not attempt this at the Marilyn Manson fan site, as it results in no lulz but requests for more photos.
Modern Myths
- Paris Hilton is an exhibitionist porn star. Status: True
- Michael Jackson is a whack-job baby raper.
Status: False. He is the most beautiful person on earth and he can talk to aaaaaaangels!!!!!!HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, HE'S DEAD - Alan Rickman has teh gay. Status: True. He also has a big nose which is the cause of it.
- Angelina Jolie is Brad Pitt in drag. Status: True
- The Olsen Twins plan to buy North America and legalize incest. Status: True
- Amy Winehouse is the Wicked Witch of the West. She gave the Wizard a rimjob in exchange for a time-machine hightail out of Oz and into the 21st century. Status: True, but it wasn't just a rimjob.
- Gerard Way took each of his awesome fellow band members INCLUDING HIS BROTHER up the ass. Twice. Status: True
