Ayn Rand
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
| —Ayn Rand |
A spoiled, wealthy Jewess born in Soviet Russia, Ayn Rand✡ rebelled against the system like any angsty teen and wrote a lot of crappy literature that caught on with college students, 16 year old girls, and other selfish, egotistical gaylords and sociopaths. Her sci-fi religion, Objectivism, never caught on like wildfire among those who had piles of money and wanted to keep those piles and create newer, bigger piles while they were at it; but it was a success among poor anti-hippie atheist intellectuals of the 60s. On the other hand, her philosophy of "all women have fantasies about being raped", as laid out in "The Fountainhead" caught on like wildfire with the masses.
| —Ayn Rand, on LOLs |
Objectivism (AR's religion) launched a Jihad against rational thought at least a millennium ago. Therefore ED lies as high in their priorities as their acolytes typical state of mind (see graphic to the right). Yet in spite of this, Rand and her minions are largely humorless dickless wonders.
lulz.
Contents |
Objectivism
A less successful version of Dianetics Wikipedia, it consists of a "technology" to make socially backward basement dwellers into self-righteous zealots.
Objectivism came from Ayn's utter hatred of communism with every centipede in her vagina. She knew that when you give people a chance to be fair in all things, they would wait until you weren't looking and steal everything that wasn't nailed down and on fire (On-line communists will argue that capitalism causes this greed, because they have no experience of owning anything anyone else wants). That's why we have the godly government which is composed of people with a higher nature than us and who shit ice cream and piss champagne.
In her own words:
- My philosophy, in essence, is the concept of man as a heroic being, with his own happiness as the moral purpose of his life, with productive achievement as his noblest activity, and reason as his only absolute.
TL;DR? She expected all men to be a combination of Indiana Jones and Thomas Edison, fighting looters like gold-crazed Nazis and single-handedly inventing practical new alloys AT THE SAME TIME. Those seeking to become heroes through Objectivism, by contrast, end up as failures who wish Rush wrote songs about them. Her book "Atlas Shrugged" shows that she's a staunch libertarian on all issues except labor, because unskilled workers were put on the Earth by a God she doesn't believe in to be used and abused by the upper class and then discarded. Basically, it's Stalinism with the identities of the "workers" and "parasites" reversed. Proletarians aren't human, they're scum - making her "philosophy" a less honest version of Nietzsche's. Not to mention that she had a major cult of personality.
As an economic theory, Objectivism can be accurately modeled using cheese triangles.
Ayn Rand outlined her vision of aesthetics in "The Romantic Manifesto" and "The Art of Fiction Writing" in which she explains how to plagiarise lesser known novels such as Garet Garrett's "The Driver" and Yevgeny Zamyatin's "We", and then use them as a vehicle for a crude, batshit insane home-made religion for turning ordinary people into autistic sociopaths.
In her own words:
- My philosophy, in essence, is the concept of man as being too retarded for real philosophy but not retarded enough for Scientology.
The Fountainhead
Rand's first book was The Fountainhead, a novel that was part rape-fantasy romance novel, part glorified masturbationfest towards people who draw Italian postcards, and part condemnation of the dumbing down of the American people. The story involves a down-and-out architect turned rapist and arsonist that no one will hire because he doesn't build according to the tastes of the dumb ignorant mob. He rapes a rich girl who was asking for it. She then becomes obsessed with him but shows her commitment by marrying everyone BUT her obsession because she thinks that, if they stay apart and remain miserable, they will be superior to the chattel of humanity that surrounds them.
It was made into a movie in 1948, infamous as far as Rand throwing a tantrum to force the screen-writers to keep her long, incoherent speech at the end when the architect-rapist-arsonist speaks to a jury and successfully gets acquitted by playing the "I blew up a building because I had the right to do so as an individual" card.
Face it. Howard could never, ever, EVER have survived in the real capitalist world.
Atlas Shrugged
The poster child for TL;DR, Atlas Shrugged is considered the gateway book for Rand's cult of Objectivism. The Israelies in charge of her estate are collecting money and pushing more ammounts of indoctrinating TL;DR into schools. Better than the Catcher in the Rye, though: it weights more.
Atlas Shrugged is a 10,000,000-page brick of a book whose supposed climax is a 60-page speech by the main character, who doesn't actually show up until page 600. In it, Rand outlines her utopia: men are men, women are subservient, maniacal bitches, and everybody who has ever disagreed with her, faltered in their agreement with her, or just not agreed hard enough dies a horrible, slow death after the fall of civilization.
Back in the 1970s, Albert S. Ruddy, the producer of "The Godfather," first approached Ayn Rand to make a movie of her novel "Atlas Shrugged." But Rand, who had fled the Soviet Union and gone on to inspire capitalists and egoists everywhere, worried aloud, apparently in all seriousness, that the Soviets might try to take over Paramount to block the project.
The plot goes something like this: America is ruled by generic 50's socialist overlords who have everyone turned into lazy drunken Russians and broke everything until John Galt, a robot from the future, comes back in time to save computers and major airlines from not being created. At the same time a nymphomaniac has a crush on the android, and then they have robot sex in the subway. It takes 1,200 pages to sum it up.
The opening words of this book are "Who is John Galt?" ParkingStones crossed out the words "Who is John Galt?" and replaced them with "Dude, Where's My Car?" The meaning stayed pretty much the same.
It's more useful as a doorstop than actual reading material.
Anthem
In contrast, her novella by the name of Anthem is written on three toilet papers. Ayn once used them to clean her period blood off of her cat's mouth. She was so inspired by her kitty's explosive tongue action that she immediately wrote every word that came to her brain. The result was Anthem.
This is great to read while fucking a cheap whore, since both are really men in disguise.
Ayn Rand: Vindictive Whore
Ayn Rand married struggling actor Frank O' Connor in 1929; as Ayn was a power-mad feminist writer, Frank quickly assumed the role of bitch to his domineering wife. When Ayn met the young (and married) Objectivist and fanboy Nathaniel Branden, the two began fucking each other, ultimately telling their spouses that they needed to STFU about Ayn and Nathan's adultery and live with it.
During this time, Nathaniel Branden became a leading figure in spearheading the Objectivist movement. But this all came to an end, when Nathaniel was caught fucking a third woman, a young actress, behind Ayn Rand's back. Ayn disowned her boytoy and had him become a pariah within the Objectivist movement for daring to cheat on Ayn. Of course, Ayn herself was cheating on Branden, with Alan "I accidentally the dollar" Greenspan, who remarked "I have fucked many women over the years, but never have I fucked a woman like Rand, whose vagina was crawling with centipedes!"
And the Jew will inherit the Earth
Objectivists imagine a rational world where everybody would mind their own rational self-interest and people wouldn't troll each other but work individually to achieve unparalleled wealth. This means creating more A.I., who would naturally decide that people are not as rational as robots and should therefore be exterminated for having seized the undeserved like the socialist leeches we are. Since the pursuit of wealth by robots is their highest principle only after Israel's right to exist, it can be concluded that the Jews will be the only "humans" to inherit the Earth.
What to do with her "novels"
Beat up children with them, because nobody has phone books anymore. It doesn't have to be your children, any children will do nicely.
"Nazi" you say? Try reading it and then tell us it's not justified.
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=_B4pgo9Db6w
"Bet your ass you ignorant piece of shit if given the chance i would burn you and your entire family alive any day of the week" - a typically calm and rational Objectivist response.
Noteworthy Randroids
- Jimbo Wales
- Ebeneezer Scrooge
- El Rushbo
- Glenn Beck
- That asshole that keeps posting "Who is John Galt" posters around campus.
- Rfjason
- Weev
- Starblade
- Cannibalcountry
- Jay Naylor
- alitheia - template Randite sociopath
- Andrew Ryan
Objectivist Communities
- objectivism - sadder than furries.
- furjectivists - two sad things that go worse together.
Virtual Objectivsm
The Objectivist Institute has a presence on Second Life, where it is located at Marco Island 87, 34, 23 ("Your Galt's Gulch away from home"). The sheer immensity of the faggotry that goes on there is suspected to defy most traditional methods whereby faggotry is quantified.
Trivia
- Francis hates Rand. Thus making him a pretty cool guy.
External Links
- AynRand.org
- From A to Z the answers to all questions, no need to think anymore
- What is Objectivism?
- The Abridged Atlas Shrugged
- http://www.nationallampoon.com/nl/08_features/xmasspecials/xmasspecials.asp Ayn Rand's A Selfish
Christmas (#3)
- Murray Rothbard shows how Objectivism is no different from other cults.
- Atlas Shrugged 2
- Troll These Fags HARD
See Also
