Atheist Scum United

From Encyclopedia Dramatica

Atheist Scum United, also known as The ASU, and What A Bunch Of Wankers, is the brain-dead child of the brain-dead idiot anti-savant YouTuber TheAmazingAtheist. As a YouTube organization (and failed trolling group,) its main aim was to (a) promote the subscriber base of TheAmazingAtheist, (b) make TheAmazingAtheist look like an even more militant, deranged, anti-intellectual loon than he already is, and (c) destroy the rival YouTube atheist psychopath, OneLessGod.

“	YOUR MOST CHERISH BELIEFS ARE WRONG!	„
—The ASU slogan on the main page (grammar Nazis need not apply for ASU.)

The Original Video

HAHAHA, disregard that i suck cocks. Removed by user because he couldn't stand the heat; he should have stayed out of the flame wars.

“	We will not content ourselves to sit at home and complain.	„
—A neckbearded fattie sitting at home and complaining, which is all he ever fucking does.

ASU Hidden Truth

Once everyone had finished rofling, everyone went to the ultra cool website that was going to lead Atheists to the promised land of milk and honey; only to find that it was mostly under construction apart from the main page which said:

“	Welcome to the Atheist Scum United website! We are social and political movement focused on the degradation of all religious beliefs and the explicit separation of church and state. Whereas some atheist groups specialize in legal action and other groups have a kinder response to religious dogma, we at Atheist Scum United use a more offensive approach. Our philosophy is to actively engage people’s beliefs with creative license. We also actively work towards preventing theocracy on our governments. If you are interested in taking an affirmative march against religion then join us and welcome to Atheist Scum United.	„
—Site intro.

This immediately raised some confusion among the Atheist community, after all, why bother making the video so early if the organization hadn't even made any founding rules or principles? So a few curious Atheists, using some 1337 5up37 h4x0r ski11s found the pages that were under construction (more like under failstructon, amirite?) and found that TJ was actually making a trolling organization, and a shitty one at that. In an ironic twist of fate, the ASU fucktards were going to use its handful of militant Atheists to gather information about their so-called "Fucktard" enemies, and attack them in a rather non-intellectual manner by spamming them with dehumanizing propaganda, just for having a different belief system. While it is obvious that this was just the fat fucks ego in action, he and his merry band of Atheist pals still say that it was all about "bringing people together." Once this information was revealed, the stupid Atheists sheeple who had previously made comments on the original ASU introduction video, saying "I'm in!", were now feeling kinda down (OneLessGod, Xild, Jude and every other TAA drone).

Some of the "Rules of Engagement."

The Drama

Like a retarded rat to rat-poison, OneLessGod duly signed up to the ASU with his flying-monkey-infested sex-toy, Xild, babbling and lurching along behind. Thus the ASU achieved its maximum princely size of three members. (Some have argued that HardCaseOwnsYou was a member. This in generally dismissed however on the grounds that HardCase was never anything more than a glue-factory just waiting to happen.)

Within 15 minutes of its formation, The Brett Keane formerly of YouTube, then of LiveVideo, then of his own galactic empire of the internets, but always of his own ass, attacked the fledgling organization Of The Rightly Guided Three on the grounds that his own sock-puppets were more attracted to it than to himself. OneLessGod and his dildo Xild fought tooth and nail against The Cheeseburger Killer Keane - mainly by randomly calling random individuals (and the occasional flying monkey) "prissy pants". The strategy was working until Burger Keane received unexpected support from none other than the ASU's own founding member, TheAmazinglyDeadShitAtheist.

The Freudian act of betrayal sent OneLessGod completely over the edge of insanity (nothing changed for Xild and her army of monkeys). OneLessGod started using violent swear words against Jabber The Keane and TheAmazingBackstabbingCoward - words such as "prissy" and "pants," often juxtaposed. In retaliation, The Brett Keane proceeded to (a) beat his wife and dead mother (bones still available for sale if anyone's interested), and (b) reveal that OneLessGod was a pillow-biter. OneLessGod disappeared in a poof of shame, disgrace and latent homophobia, while Xild, in a touchingly revolting act of sado-masochism, offered herself up to TheAmazingAtheist.

The Aftermath

Thus both the ASU and OneLessGod were dead, just as TheAmazingAtheist had planned all along. (This entire monumental Oedipal struggle took approximately 24 hours to comprehensively analyze itself out of existence.<-lol wut)

The ASU also caused a new group of equal faggotry to be spawned called the IAM (Internet Atheist Mafia), which the members of claim is "totally different and in no way similar to the ASU".