Applemilk1988
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Applemilk1988 is a YouTube celebrity who is totally fluent in Japanese.
Whereas some Japanophiles keep their power level to a specific minimum (and the horrendous majority of them don't), she couldn't act like a person if she wanted to. Not only does she appear to the normal discerning eye to be completely fucking confused as to what color she is, even her friends and family can't help but take notice of how she really is convinced that she's Japanese.
[edit] The Legacy of Faggotry
To her, everything is "pretty intense," and she uses this adjective for everything when she's not talking moonspeak. She also wishes to be a J-pop idol, but due to her extreme lack of talent, substance, having a soul, or being azn, we can thank sweet merciful fuck that that will never happen.
Last Thursday, Emiry's MySpace BALEETED caught the attention of the nigras on 4chan /b/, some thinking that she was the real life Cracky-chan. But when they realized that this was actually not Cracky but just some delusional weeaboo, those who had mistaken her for Cracky quickly became an heroes or just fapped to more guro porn. Like the cancer that is killing /b/, Emiry's MySpace and Youtube profile were posted over and over again at least a trillion times, prompting Anonymous to troll her videos and her Stickam profile (which she has registered on the Japanese Stickam site, how wapanese).
[edit] The Other Legacy of Faggotry
March 2007, a user from 4chan spotted a YouTube video of a girl who was holding a contest. Nothing special, until she mentioned that her dream was to get over nine thousand subscribers on her YouTube.
A few moments later, Anonymous posted the link on /b/ with little to no response, so "same person spamming" commenced and the thread quickly got filled with "i would do her in the mouth so she would shut the fuck up."
After countless amounts of Youtube spammings she got online and started to defend her ways, deleting comments and confirming she was a part of 2ch and the "chan scene." A few threads later, her other websites, Myspace and blogs were found. The more Anonymous found, the more it got obvious that the weeaboo level of this person was beyond anything Anonymous had ever encountered before.
A few days after the first threads began, Emiry arrived on /b/ itself. She and her followers spammed the threads with countless images of her and her friends. For a short time it seemed that Emiry was winning over the internet hate machine... but this was about to change as a poster on 2ch's English board posted what is today known as the AT FULL FORCE post.
Interest in Emiry quickly faded, but she held a special place in Anonymous' heart, and Anonymous did not forget.
[edit] The Autobiography of Faggotry
Here are some facts about Emiry.
- She regularly listens to Ayumi Hamasaki despite 'hating' her. She cried when she first listened to "RAINBOW".
- Just like everyone else, she found out about Japanese from anime. She claims to speak it "fluently" though her videos prove her way wrong: she uses "ano.." (umm) to connect sentences, she makes several amateur mistakes, and it has been said that she uses a dictionary when updating her blog.
- Two words: Ass Burgers.
- She thinks she's the only female who plays video games.
- Something else about jpop that no one cares about.
[edit] Jewbacca's Final Solution to the Japanophile Question
Emiry finally became truly internets famous in August 2007, when the internet hate machine finally owned the dumb Japanophile. Anonymous and Jewbacca obtained her Jewtube password, GOATSED her userpage, and finally deleted all her videos and closed her account. More ownage soon followed.
In the early morning hours of Saturday, August 4th 2007 a noble /b/tard, Jewbacca, hacked Applemilk's Jewtube password (which was LordNishikawa555 because she's a weeaboo), and proceeded to destroy her page by taking down all of her old videos, uploading a Tayroll video, and filling her page with loldongs and goatse. Her Facebook wasn't safe from Jewbacca's wrath either, and at approximately 3:35 A.M. it was compromised.
At approximately 6:39 A.M., a 3rd key email was confirmed and later the password. These were quickly given to Ebaums because, like a dumb shit, Jewbacca doesn't know the moonspeak. With access granted to anonymous, her Stickam was totally ravaged--displaying the page with Emiry doing what she does best: weeabooing and handjobs.
[edit] Syphilis is SUPER KAWAII DESU NE
Shortly after Emiry's accounts got raped, word came in, from a friend she ditched in Japan, about her sexual exploits. Even though she will exclusively fuck only Japanese guys, she still has no problem getting cock any chance she can. A leaked AIM conversation (pictured on right) reveals that she contracted a SUPER KAWAII STD from her honky loving boyfriend Daisuke, citing swollen glands and creepy crawlies in her vagoo as proof. Anon's medical wing has decided that this could easily be syphilis. Poor, poor Emiry. Syphilis is easily treated with high dose i.v. antibiotics but if untreated leads to initial delusions of grandeur and changes in personality, recurrent painless sores and eventually to insanity. Unfortunately, with Emiry, nobody would even notice the difference.
[edit] Recent Developments
Emiry will make an attempt to come back to Stickam. In the bitch's own words:
"My first Stickam live is going to be on Thursday night at 9PM Japan time. If you have time, please come at watch!"
Anonymous is rumored to be gathering its armies to shut the weeaboo down once again.
Last Thursday Applemilk updated her Youtube account with a new video (plz troll; TITS OR GTFO) in which she describes her methods of combatting her recent case of cockroaches with a 100% Nihon model first aid spray. So far, she has failed to rid herself of her ailment.
[edit] AppleMeth
In her newest video, Emiry is extremely irritable, has an increased appetite for sex, doesn't stop to take a fucking breath, and talks about paying one thousand American Dollars for Japanese tea, although her quote of 100 yen is actually about one dollar. This proves that she will never be AZN because she can't do maths. In response to comments pointing out her meth-head behavior, she threw a paranoid fit and deleted fucking everything, like you'd expect from a tweaker. AppleMeth had better watch out, as getting caught with drugs in Japan will get your white tourist gaijin ass thrown out for life.
This is further verified by her featured Stickam videos, which are mostly her talking about how much she loves Xenu. Oh, and she claims that she's lost 300 lbs. due to the 'Subway diet' (cough, meth, cough), and that she's down to 200 lbs. now.
[edit] "New" LJ (October 15, 2007, now deleted)
Note: Her new AIM is "mellowcrow" and her MSN is "mellowcrow@hotmail.co.jp" according to this LJ. Don't know if she's still using it, but it might be worth it to try to say hello.
Last Thursday Emiry created a new LJ in attempts to push her faggy lies onto her drooling fanbase. The username was pornocow, which was sickeningly accurate. It is important to note that she added herself as a friend, which is probably one of the most egotistical things a person can do (which describes Emiry perfectly). Once raspberrysyrup posted the link, she deleted fucking everything in attempts to salvage her pride.
No such thing, Emiry!
For the TL;DR people, here's the long and short of the posts (the full posts can be found in the gallery after this section).
22 September, 10 PM: Blah blah blah, basically bullshit that no one cares about. She says she wants to grow more beautiful. Let's fucking hope so.
23 September, 10 AM: Emiry is annoyed at her "job" (she says she makes money for it), just like everyone else in this god damned world. She makes sure to feed her own ego by saying that she has thousands of people watching her.
23 September, 4 PM: Emiry realizes what she's done with her life and posts a one word journal: "Fuck." Upon further review, the title of said post is "中絶", which means abortion, leading the /b/tards to the conclusion that the spawn of applemilk was swiftly cored.
25 September, 9 AM: "I feel like this is going to be my first LiveJournal where I can just write whatever I want to, and not worry about it. I'll remain anonymous on here, never saying my name or where I live." This is a lie because she would never do anything privately. She's an attention whore and her ego does not allow her to do something privately. She also said that she'd delete fucking everything if someone found out, but luckily raspberrysyrup made screenshots of everything for the lulz. She blahs on after this, feeding her own ego with bullshit like "Whenever I walk down the street, people recognize me." "My best friend betrayed me and posted my entire personal life and personal information on the internet." Then she bawwws about ALMOST RAPED, er, was it actual rape? The rest of the entry is emo TL;DR.
25 September, 12 AM: Says she found a job. I doubt it's a real one.
26 September, 11 AM: She talks about trying to find a job. She refers to herself as the ultimate manipulator. She pats herself on the back for having a few friends.
27 September, 12 PM: She didn't hang out with those friends (therefore that pat on the back is null and void?). All of Korea is angry with her, which makes it just like America now! She got a job offer from a nursery, but who in their right mind would hire someone like THAT to take care of her kids? "I WANT TO BE A MODEL YET I'M STILL HUNGRY, THIS MAY NOT CONTINUE, GOD DAMN IT."
28 September, 3 PM: She blahs on about her drunkie mother in a TL;DR post. Probably to pretend that's "why she's so fucked up," since she never really cares about anyone else unless it's for her own personal profit.
29 September, 7 PM: She hurt her knee and she's pregnant.
30 September, 11 PM: RAPE ANNIVERSARY! HAPPY RAPE DAY, EMIRY!
01 October, 9 AM: Lots of emo bawwwwing about raining and school.
11 October, 1 PM: She claims to have forgotten about the LJ. She says she goes to the gym frequently and doesn't eat (which she somehow says is "healthy"), and then misuses the semi-colon when she says dieting "controls the lives of women." Not all women, bitch. Just you. She talks about her boyfriend, then about her failing to get a job and actually do anything with her life.
15 October, 8 AM: She and her Mom watch a documentary about anorexia. As Emiry is easily influenced and an attention whore to boot, she mentions she wants to go back to this. Blah blah blah, pro-ana bullshit, etc.
15 October, 12 PM: Bawwwing about not having enough money, and then turning around and saying she's getting $800 items in the mail and constantly receiving money from her "adoring fans." WTF? She also thinks that the only thing keeping her from 'striking it rich' is that she's fat, when really it's her lack of talent and lack of beauty. She goes on to write about how she thinks that otaku idolize her, while basically calling them scum.
[edit] LJ gallery, chronological order
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 中絶 means "abortion" in Japanese |
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[edit] Jewtube Responses of The Lulzy Sort
Vocab, what up?!
[edit] Your Duty to lulz
Seek and Destroy the filthy weeaboo at any possible interval.
Prove that the internet will not tolerate her kind.
[edit] Contact Info
Her AIM = AfureruNamida (really do chat her up, the bitch deserves it)
Email:
NEW EMAIL:oh_crime@hotmail.com
greenether@hotmail.com
applemilk1989@gmail.com
lilyphilia@hotmail.co.jp
lilyphilia1@gmail.com
Her MySpace account:
http://www.myspace.com/etherdive
Her Last.fm account:
http://www.last.fm/user/etherdive/
Be careful - she will most likely delete your shouts. You may try to become her friend and then recommend her funny artists like Anal Cunt, 4chan, Adolf Hitler and the like.
[edit] Recent Activity on Stickam.com
Emiry herself is currently very active on Stickam.com, a place where faggots go to live chat about how miserable their lives are. She hosts live chats with her fans at random hours of the day, opening a vast hole of lulz potential.
Her profile page is here. [1]
NOTE: You have to add her as a friend first, but she accepts everyone almost immediately.
As Stickam has grown into a global camwhore network, it has expanded to Japan, where Emiry of course quickly joined with several other weeaboo faggots who attempt to invade Japan. She seems quite active, making friends with omg real azns, probably one day hoping to achieve full domination of Japan's internet.
Her profile page is here. [2]
[edit] "EMIRI" DEBUT IN JAPAN!
So if you didn't know how famous Emily is in Japanlands, you should know now. She was featured in a tiny talk show at Ameba Studio called Chomera Nightチョメらナイト in July 08(same people who host her blog). In this lulzy video, Emily sits there looking so kawaii with some material hanging off her nose, which is good quality comedy. She repeatedly says "hai" (yes) to every verification question about herself, which clearly states how fluent she is in Japanese. At the end of such a hilarious video, she states that her name is Paul McCartney. Don't worry Emily, they were laughing WITH YOU.
[edit] CIA Operations Against Applemilk1988, May 3-30, 2008
[edit] AIM Convos with Jack Ryan
On 3 May 2008, the successor to Jewbacca known as "Jack Ryan" made startling headway in mind-fucking the weeaboo; he managed to get her on AIM and engage in intense conversation with her. The talks lasted for two days until he finally could not take it anymore, and offended her to the point where she stopped talking. In the end, she thought a 42-year old radio disc jockey named Chio from Philadelphia was her stalker, and she still believes it to this day. It seems she only talked to "Jack Ryan" when she thought she could get on the radio; all for the publicity which she so desires but never seems to be able to obtain.
All four conversations are available in a zip file here: [3].
In addition to the AIM conversations, "Jack Ryan" has created a Youtube account where several videos chronicling highlights of his chat with the weeaboo have been uploaded: [4].
[edit] Epic Info
Jack Ryan has recently made epic strides in the war against Applemilk; her safe haven in New York has been exposed via her father, Kevin's, contact information. Along with her stepmother's address in Florida, this new information confirms that the weeaboo is not fully secure anywhere outside of her current temporary residence in Japan. This was realized on 30 May 2008. Due to the highly personal nature of this information and its potential for abuse (lulz), it is not allowed to be posted directly on ED; therefore, this text document contains the addresses and other info that was present on here until recently: [5]. Feel free to take a look if you hate Applemilk as much as we do.
[edit] M-chan, the beginning of Emiry's 'career'
Unknown to some, Emiry attempted to become a model/pop star in America before going to Japan as recorded in her old LJ and Myspace. This showcased her sixteen year old self in a sexy outfit as she whored around a couple of cops on a dirty street. It's important to note that her father paid for all these photographs, probably to add them to his own growing personal collection.
 Japanese appetite for an American girl |
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[edit] Emiry is a MODEL
Emiry has been hired by the Japanese agency ATOP to be a gravure model. Srsly.
It is not currently known how many Japanese businessmen were blown to make this happen. Sources reckon at least 100, and potentially over 9000. But hey, she is our first foreign gravure model, so that has to count for something! Right? Right??
Amusingly her various body measurements are provided in pdf format. In it she claims her hometown to be New York City and her height and weight measurements would make her clinically underweight. Given that any moron can see from the provided images that Emiry is far too fat to make it as a model, one can only conclude that either the company is bogus and lies about their models, that Emiry is a lying whore, or both.
Other data provided, though obviously this may be total bullshit, includes: DOB: 25/5/1989, Blood Type: B, Height 178cm, Breasts 91cm, Waist 60cm, Hips 93cm, Shoe size 25.5cm, hobbies: Music, "Video game", talent:singing, dream: to be a singer.
At this point the world is holding its breath and waiting with trepidation Emiry's descent from bikini shots along that most common of routes, passing rapidly to topless work to nudes to soft porn to hardcore anal and finally to death from a heroin overdose at 32.
 Commence fapping at full force. |
 Pretty intense fapping. |
 One of these things is not like the others... |
She will apparently be releasing a DVD on September 25th for everyone to furiously masturbate to. Her latest post in her official moonspeak blog linked to a site with promotional pictures. Trying to capatialize on the internet she reanacts tubgirl in her video. In her new DVD she does: full anal, double penetration, bukkake, all lesbian gangbang, lemonparty, a tranny, Barack Obama and your mom.
A highly-fappable video preview of her DVD is available here (Push the button on the left to start it). Also available here, but the quality's not as good.
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 OH GOD HOW DOES I UNSEE PALE FAT? |
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 Me rikey chunky white wimmen |
 OH GOD WHY!? |
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[edit] AIM and screenshots
 Raspberrysyrup's deleted LiveJournal. |
 Her intense and kawaii facebook . |
 haxx0red stickam ichi (lol weeaboo speak for 1). |
 haxx0red stickam ni (lol moar moonspeaks for 2, ne?) ^O^ |
 The end result. |
 Ebaumsworld did it. |
 PLZ call Emiry in Japan. |
 She needs to know how Anonymous really feels |
 How do I lost muffintops |
 if i have to be raped to get comfort |
 Emiry planning to become a hooker. |
 wat |
 prolly have sex overseas |
 keep dreaming Emiry |
 I love abuse. I love abuse. I love abuse. I love abuse. |
 Emiry knows more than you. |
[edit] Other images
 The Apple of Japan's Eye, the beautiful Emiry. |
 How Emiry makes money when none of her faggot fans will give her any. |
 There Is No Apples In Milk. |
 Yup. This sums up her current sex life in Japan. |
 Some weeaboo... that penis is obviously not Asian. |
 Scientific Proof Of Applemilk's Un-hotness |
 Gender confusion? lolwut |
 I dunno. lol |
 Emiry, clearly becoming a crack whore. |
 Emiry in Tokyo waiting for one of the Japanese dicks she will later that night suck, ya rly. |
 She'll do anything to be a Japan Idol. |
 Before and after shoop da whoop of her tits. |
 Applemilk with teh Sauce |
 Emiry showing off her vagoo |
 wut now |
 preview from her DVD |
 wait... wat? |
 Emiry is obviously AZN |
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 lol photobucket haxx'd |
 lol i want 2b a jpop star when i grow up! |
 typical applemilk photo |
 sign says: bonni pinku mitai ni? iro....translation:Does it look like bonny pink? Color... (Moonspeak) |
 geeze-freeze-frizz |
[edit] AIDS related links
- Her SUPER KAWAII Youtube - Back in business, should be nuked from orbit.
- Her SUPER KAWAII KARAOKE Youtube - Her singing Youtube, needs to be fucked AT FULL FORCE.
- Her 'gothic mae' Youtube - Emiry as a goth, not nearly as hot as one may have thought.
- Her SUPER KAWAII Myspace Emiry's first attempt at becoming famous.
- Her NEW SUPER KAWAII Myspace Find Jewbacca and rape it.
- Her first LiveJournal Her first LJ from back in 2004, where she claims her name to be 'Daisuke Takeuchi'.
- Her underage b& LiveJournal When she first tries to make it famous by posing half naked while underage in 2005.
- Her SUPER KAWAII LiveJournal It's back up. This needs to be remedied.
Her current stickam accountshe doesn't use it anymore.
- Her SUPER KAWAII Mixi profile Taken, but Jewbacca speaks not the moonspeak
Her SUPER KAWAII Myspace Her last hugbox standingLOL J/K NUKED
Her SUPER KAWAII official site - Which by the way, she didn't make it herself, she just likes to have people think she did. [6]LOL J/K NUKED
Her SUPER KAWAII Stickam profile - It's on the Japanese Stickam site because the regular Stickam site wasn't wapanese enough for her.キルトウィフファイル！ KILT WIF FAIRU! (the Japanese is KAWAII DESU NEEEEE)
Emiry's underage 'modeling' pictures (someone needs to find the password for this)lol j/k password found see photos above!
 to this topic for græt justice.
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Applemilk1988 is part of a series on YouTube |
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Applemilk1988 is related to a series on AZNS. |
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Applemilk1988 is part of a series on Whores. |
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