Animal
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
For information on Animal Rights, see ALF.
Animals are the thing furries and PETA drool over. These little insignificant creatures are always prone to shitting everywhere, not giving a fuck and making your life worse in every manner. Nobody gives a shit about animals because they have no souls and are worthless piles of shit. Animals are also delicious and have always been thought of that way. What the vegans are missing out on are the tasty morsels of animal flesh, dumb fucks.
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Biology
According to Classical Reality, some things are alive and some are dead.
The things which are alive are either Fauna or Flora. These are fancy names for "tasty" and "not tasty."
Incorrect Biology
According to nutbags, some things are alive and some things are dead.
The things which are alive are either Flora or Fauna or Humans. These are fancy names for Plants (Ick), Animals (Yum) and Humans (acquired taste). Humans need to believe in God or they will be sent to Hell.
Furries
According to Furries and 4chan, some things are alive and some things are dead.
The things which are alive are either Flora or Fauna or Humans. These are fancy names for Plants, Animals, Zombies, and Humans. Some humans are actually animals in disguise. If you disagree with this bullshit, you are committing fursecution SO GO DINE IN HELL.
All furries try to have sex with animals. When they can't find an animal they want, they make a doll.
The Muppets
According to the Muppets, Animal was a drummer. "An-i-MAL!!!! Eat drums! Eat drums!"
Interactions with Humans
Some people choose to make animals their pets. They do this because they are lonely, fat and ugly. They think that their pets understand them and don't judge them but they're really just their for the free food and shit. Others take their animal relationships a step too far.
Mother's furry shame as first genetic furry is exposed after 20 years of hiding.
Mothers secret shame leaves daughter disfigured. Doctors say she is beyond medical help and suggested that perhaps Disney (could help)/(have helped). Disney claim copyright infringement and phile for damages claiming that this is just a smear campaign by the Fursecutionists.
The World Health Organization warn of transsexual repercussions from furplay (not to be confused with yiff).
Head of the ‘furrys on line’ asked that the furry hybrid be brought to Stickam where 4chan members would treat her good, claiming that they will always stand by their manifesto of ‘TITS OR GTFO’ and bring the helpless happiness.
Animal Behavior
Typical homogay animal behavior. Also typical furry behavior.
List of Famous Animals
- PETA
- ALF
- Furries
- Bestiality
- Horses
- Mr. Hands
- Scared Monkey
- Dogs
- Lolcats
- Shay
- Theferrett
- The Lolrus
- Most rappers
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Animal
is a part of a series on Foods.
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