Web 2.0
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Web 2.0 is a buzzword that internet-savvy morons throw around to sound 1337. Some argue it has something to do with making the internets more like a normal computer application. Web 2.0 can only be viewed from a MacBook or a computer running Windows Vista, preferably while wearing a shirt from Threadless and drinking Smartwater in Chicago, the home of everything 2.0. Unlike Web 1.0, Web 2.0 is constantly in Beta, like the "new" JewTube skin that is constantly being offered to be viewed as opposed to just watching videos.
Web 2.0 websites are different from regular websites because instead of using several different hideous designs like Web 0.1, Web 0.5 and Web 1.0, Web 2.0 encourages using a single, pleasing design to ensure that all Web 2.0 sites look exactly the same.
Contents |
Things you need in order to make your website Web 2.0
- Ruby on Rails - the only programming framework sanctioned by the Web 2.0 governing body.
- Ajax - derived from "you are a jaxass"
- Lots of bubbly, brightly-colored icons, making it more attractive to retards, minority groups, small children, women and cats.
- Rounded corners - right angles are strictly verboten. Someone might cut themselves or put out an eye.
- Non-threatening, safe colors: orange, green, baby blue and white. A safety feature for users on drugs.
- Sam Stephenson.
- And perhaps most importantly, remove the last vowel from the name of your website - see Flickr.
Features typical of Web 2.0
- Social Networking
- Java applets that work like any other open source software, except slower and more OTI
- More features that allow camwhores and Tawneelynne to share photos a lot easier
- More backdoors for viruses
- Interactivity via wireless LAN to control web-enabled sex slaves
- Un-wanted Spam
- More serious business
- People getting the idea that their retarded fucking opinion actually means something because it's on YouTube
- Unnecessarily shiny graphics giving it a shitty vista appearance.
How to sabotage Web 2.0
- Annoyed by CSS layouts that still don't work on IE?
- Irritated by browser-consuming useless "addons" that don't really add 1 atom of usefulness to sites?
- Tired of fucking neckbearded, overweight Linux users making their sites "open source" and not letting you actually read anything?
Don't get mad, SABOTAGE WEB 2.0 SITES TODAY!:
- Search "geocities metal black metal" on Google.
- Click fucking everything
- Save all .gif animations
- Make own site with stolen images
- Sell adspace
- ?????
- MOTHERFUCKING PROFIT!!!
(If you're French, you can also vote for Web 2.0 MAN the French minister of Digital Economy)
Sites that are totally 2.0
On December 6, 2007, mootle was bored and decided 4chan wasn't looking ENTERPRISE enough. That made him upgrade to Web 2.0, hoping that might attract some advertisers (fat chance, moot, even the dumbest ad network knows your site is completely unmarketable to anyone). /b/tards, like the 13 year old boys they are with nothing better to do, decided to throw a tantrum over a pointless main page layout change. In "retaliation," those same brain damaged kids decided to start spreading rumors of needing 4chan Gold/Platinum/Diamond accounts via image macros, which was humorous for a while, until everyone but the most humorless /b/tards got bored of the forced gimmick. It eventually forced moot and the mods to start banning anyone who posted them.
See Also
External links
- A web 2.0 browser - OMGWTFBBQ
- Wikipedia's article - The fact that people take this seriously is funny enough
- An instructional video describing how to use Web 2.0
- A general user's view of Web 2.0
- Web 2.0 may result in compatibility issues
- Anyone can make a Web 2.0 website
Web 2.0 is part of a series on Web 2.0 | Web 2.0 • Social networking • Social networking sites • Blogging • Blogosphere • PHP • Hypercube • Podcasting • Wikiing • Ajax • Ruby on Rails • Internet Humanitarianism • X is not your personal army • User-generated content • ITunes Store
Web 2.0 Sites People of Web 2.0 |
|---|
|
Web 2.0 is part of a series on Language & Communication. |
||
